Wow that is a lot of sex. It hurts to have that much sex and still feel lonely doesn't it? I know where you are coming from. DH and I don't have sex nearly that much but we do have sex quite a bit and other than that I feel like I have to beg for attention, praise, hugs, kisses, cuddles, etc. It feels so frustrating. Hang in there and I hope things get better for you. Have you tried counseling? I know everyone suggests that but sometimes I think it is really the only thing that can help a marriage. Good luck to you and let us all know how things are going!
You may get past this... but how, exactly, if he doesn't change? It's messed up that on top of doing this when you don't feel like it (which I have really strong opinions about in the first place), you need to initiate it and do all the "work" as well? This isn't just about sex, it's about a really unhealthy dynamic.
I get that it's the closest you get to an emotional connection. But since it really isn't giving you that either, I simply would not do it. Because as long as you do, he has no reason to acknowledge or meet your needs. He sounds very selfish. Sometimes you need to put your foot down and make choices.