Mothering Forum banner

1 - 3 of 3 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
537 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
A little background . . I have twins boys that will be five in June. They were born at 38 weeks and both weighed about 6 pounds (i.e., they were not premature or particularly small).<br><br>
The two boys are vastly different. H has always been very comfortable in his own skin and is very easy to parent. O has always had a harder time of it and has seemed to be more sensitive and easily pushed into disequilibrium. I've considered in the past that perhaps O has some form of SID, but when I've flipped through the books on this topic, I've put them down thinking, that's just not it. But I'm not so sure. At a parent-teacher preschool conference at their Waldorf school, the teacher referred to him as having "sensory issues". I'll explain further . . .<br><br>
O really doesn't enjoy his Waldorf preschool that much, he tells me, because of all the kids and commotion. Last year, as a three-year-old, he didn't have any problems in the same program (although the space is different and a lot tighter). Now, when I come to pick him up, he always acts pissed off at me until we are in the car driving away. The teacher told us that when the room that the kids are playing in gets loud and crazy, that he starts to act up (gets loud), and then when they shuffle everyone outside, he comes back in to play by himself. He's always enjoyed playing by himself, and with his brother - they do great together, but O can be very physical with him (not with any other kids though) and really acts out in this way when tired or angry. In general, his senses just seem to overload more quickly than other kids. When he starts to get tired and overwhelmed, he'll collapse into my lap and feign sleep - he just needs to shut down. And while he often says heart-meltingly sweet things to me, if he's tired, I'm going to hear some hateful things out of his little mouth. It doesn't really bother me personally, it just makes me sad that he's feeling that frustrated and negative.<br><br>
O hit all of his developmental milestones on time, but was not early (e.g., crawling by 10 months, walking by 14 months). Potty learning was not easy, but resolved by age 3.75 on all counts. He bit his brother often as a toddler, and now hits, but we're working with him on that and its getting better. He has always been very verbal and doesn't have any issues with communication or expression. Also, he doesn't have any sensitivity to things like clothing or food. He is in a gymnastics class now, and while he is almost always the last one to walk across the balance beam, etc., he enjoys it a lot and seems to be doing fine. We are also in the middle of rehearsals for a dance performance that he and his brother are in, and it is really difficult for him. The rehearsals are two hours, and he fidgets a lot and sucks on his arm during the down time, has a hard time sitting still (who wouldn't, I know . . . .), but he is hanging in there. In retrospect I should have skipped this activity (*sigh*).<br><br>
I guess I'm less concerned with labelling my son than I am about making sure that we are doing everything we can to make things easier for him, whether he has SID or is just sensitive in general. If anyone has any advice about what steps I should be taking, or whether you think I should have him evaluated based on what I've said here, please let me know.<br><br>
Thanks if you've read this far!<br><br>
Sue
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
12,445 Posts
I would sit down with the book "The Out of Sync Child" (or possibly Sensational Kids) and see how much 'fits'.<br><br>
I was very much like you were - it was clear from the start that our ds was sensitive. And I found (and still find) the book "The Highly Sensitive Child" is very helpful in dealing with him.<br><br>
At the same time, there's always been a bit nagging me that his reactions are more than just 'sensitive' - he couldn't recover from being startled for example, and he'd 'freeze' in situations where other kids (even sensitive ones) would be OK. I finally had him assessed because of the things that he was avoiding - mainly fine motor stuff. I could tell it was affecting his developing because he was at a point where he 'should' have been doing representational drawings, and he didn't/couldn't. And it's because he never drew. That and the tactile issues were not getting any better - he was refusing to wear short sleeves or shorts, no matter how hot the weather. At 3, that's within the range of normal, 4 possibly, but at nearly 5, I just had this feeling that it wasn't going to go away.<br><br>
And, I confess, I was thinking ahead to school. I see a lot of parallels between my ds and my brother. My brother had a lot of difficulty in school, mostly paying attention, and I wanted to see if we could spare him that if we could.<br><br>
So, we had him assessed. What the OT found was that (a) he had definite tactile and sound defensiveness, (b) some fine motor delays and what I hadn't even noticed: (c) rotten bilateral coordination, (d) poor core strength and (e) vestibular issues that made it difficult for him to locate his body or sounds in space - which led to the sound defensiveness because he couldn't figure out where a sound was in relation to him.<br><br>
He's been in OT for a year, and we've seen big gains in fine motor coordination (he's nearly at age level now), tactile defensiveness and core strength. We're still working on bilateral coordination and the vestibular issues, and sounds. But they're better.<br><br>
Ds is much more comfortable in his skin these days. He's less overwhelmed, and better able to interact. He's still quiet in group settings. He's still an introvert. But he doesn't freeze into inaction so often.<br><br>
So, all of this is a long of way of saying - it's possible that your son has sensory issues. Once the vestibular and bilateral coordination stuff was pointed out to me, I noticed how it was impacting his life in subtle, but definite ways.<br><br>
It's also possible that our ds would have outgrown these sensitivities/issues without therapy. Both my dh and my brother have sensory issues and learned to cope. But, what I do know is that because of therapy, he's had to worry less about them and can focus more on things like social skills and just enjoying himself!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
537 Posts
Discussion Starter #3
Thanks for your response! I guess it really couldn't hurt to have him evaluated. I would need to think about what to tell him regarding why he's being brought to an OT, and not his brother . . . Also, I'm not really sure about how to go about finding an OT who can do this - I guess I'll start with some sleuthing on the web. . .<br><br>
S.
 
1 - 3 of 3 Posts
Top