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Hello! I just thought I'd share this gem from my mother. She is definitely not on board with the gentle discipline thing. In fact I think she thinks I'm a little nutty. Anyway, I was venting to her the other day that I'm having trouble doing anything at all in the house because the kids are always wanting my attention and as long as I'm on the floor playing with them, everything is fine, but if I get up to do something all heck breaks lose.<br>
She says "well, I would set them on the floor and let them cry until their eyes fall out"<br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/yikes.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="EEK!"><br><br>
I find it hard to believe that someone would say such a thing about their own grandchildren.<br>
oh well, just thought I'd share.<br>
Amy <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile">
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/yikes2.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="yikes">:<br><br>
Oh well, guess why you're raising 'em and not your mama. You just listen to yourself and tune out the others.<br><br>
Cheers!
 

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Ugh. My MIL said that DH's nieces will throw temper tantrums when they're with their mother, but not with her because they "know better", they know she'll "beat their butts". And my SIL has no problem with her mother hitting her kids. She has no problem with her mother making them sit at the dinner table until bedtime if they refuse to try broccoli, then sending them to bed hungry. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad">
 

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that is both sad, and scary.<br><br>
i hear you. my mother is not on-board,either, and she sadly, doesn't realize that unless she stops scoffing, sighing, 'ooooo'ing (nastily) etc, when dd does something she disapproves of (like-gasp-expressing her opinion), my mother will not be seeing my kids. they're her only grandkids,but she is having a very hard time admitting that she does not have control of this situation, and that i don't care what she thinks.<br><br>
i think our moms need to realize they had their turn to be the parents, and now it's our turn!<br><br>
hang in there, mama! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/orngbiggrin.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="orange big grin">
 

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My mother did all those nasty things to me when I was little, but now she swears she never did any such thing, and is an angel with my own children.<br><br>
I am very glad she's changed her ways, but I wish she'd admit to being a wench during my own childhood!!
 

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that sounds exactly like my MIL!!! And she wonders why I won't leave DD over there. hmmmmmmm....I dunno..... <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/angry.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="angry">
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Proudly AP</strong></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">when dd does something she disapproves of (like-gasp-expressing her opinion),</div>
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Oh, I hate it so much when a kid tries to give an opinion and the parent starts having a fit about "back talk". Once I was standing in line at some burger joint and the person in front of me ordered a vanilla ice cream cone for her daughter. The little girl--probably about 7--looked up and very calmly said, "I want chocolate." The mom had a fit about "back talk." Gee whiz, I just wanted to scream at her. Why on earth can't kids have a freakin' opinion!<br><br>
Sorry, back to topic. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/orngtongue.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Stick Out Tongue"><br><br>
~Nay
 

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Uggh. My mom too. . . . I wonder how she'd feel if I were mean enough to tell her that from my childhood I have not one memory of her reading to me, playing with me or taking me to a park? She was a SAHM who obsessed on cleaning her house. It was spotless! How depressed would I be if I looked back on my life and realized all I did was clean the same house over and over and over and over and over again!
 

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Dh's mother said basically the same thing to us when we spent last weekend with her. Any time DH or I picked up our 14 month old daughter (who would generally just come over to us and hold her arms up to make her point), MIL says "you don't have to hold her, it's fine to let her cry." At one point she said to me, "when my boys were babies, the pediatrician told me that it's fine to let them sit on the floor and cry."<br><br>
I bit my lip, my tongue (whatever it took to avoid biting her head off!), and just did things my way, but finally DH said to her "We know we don't HAVE to hold her. We hold her because we want to. We want to comfort her. It's our choice, and this is how we choose to handle it." Yeah, DH!
 

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<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">She says "well, I would set them on the floor and let them cry until their eyes fall out"</td>
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Wowza! That's...frightening. I say, next time your mom comes over, have your kids put on pirate eye-patches before hand, and just tell your mom, "Well, we took your advice..." <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/nut.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="nut">
 

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Yikes, I'm sorry you have to deal with that! My mom was pretty punitive with my one brother and I, paddle with holes drilled in it (to eliminate wind resistance) anyone? But, thankfully she's done an about face, my youngest brother has NEVER been spanked, she didn't really even enforce time out. He looses privlages now that he's older (no tv or video games for bad grades, he has to read or something) but thats about it.
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>~Nikki~</strong></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Wowza! That's...frightening. I say, next time your mom comes over, have your kids put on pirate eye-patches before hand, and just tell your mom, "Well, we took your advice..." <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/nut.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="nut"></div>
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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/biglaugh.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="laugh">:
 

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Lovely. Let her know if she gets old and requires personal care from one of her grandchildren that she'll be damn glad that you raised them with compassion and respect, otherwise she might have to "Cry until *her* eyes fall out" before she gets her diaper changed <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/mischievous.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="mischief"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/mischievous.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="mischief"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/mischievous.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="mischief">
 

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We were recently visiting my mom and my dd, who was totally exhausted, had a temper tantrum while we were in a store so I said we needed to leave. In fact it was less of a temper tantrum than a breakdown from being so tired. We went to the car and were waiting for my mom to finish buying her stuff and I was sitting there comforting my dd and feeling so guilty for trying to make her go to the store. But when my mom got in the car she turned around and said to her, "Ramona, don't ever throw a fit again." To my 2.5 year old daughter. If I hadn't been so pissed off, I would have laughed it was so ridiculous. What a stupid thing to say to a toddler!<br><br>
Anyway, my dd is less than friendly with her, and my mom just laughs and says she's such a "prickly pear". I think she really knows it's because of the way she treats her, but doesn't want to admit it. Maybe.
 
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