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Most of the mamas I hang out with, I hang with because I like them, not because DD/DS have any particular friendship with their kids. But now that DD is starting to make friends of her own, how do I handle playdates where I have very little in common with the mom?<br><br>
Most of the moms in my area are in their mid-late thirties, while I'm 26, and SAHM's while I work part-time (not that I'm age-ist, one of my best friends is 10 years older than me) But when all we have in common is that our kids are the same age, how do I get thru an hour + hanging with them? And if I really can't stand the mom, how do I avoid her while still letting the kids play? (I don't picture ever having that happen; just for the sake of discussion.....)<br><br><br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/coolshine.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="sunshine">
 

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Hmmm, I really haven't had this happen - DS is 4 1/2. But he's always with me when we're out so he hasn't had much chance to form friendships on his own. He does go to pre-school 2 days a week (we thought we were going to PS and hoped this would help with transition and once we decided we weren't going to he wanted to stay in for the rest of the year), but he just thinks of the kids there as his school friends, which I am grateful for, cause I can't stand the pack of moms and their chatter while waiting to pick the kids up, LOL. Nothing in common.<br><br>
There was a birthday party invitation, but I just declined. Ds is of the age now, though, that playdates are more without one of the moms or sets of parents. So I'll often drop him at a friends house to play with her kids (they all get along well and have been hanging together for 4 years) or she'll drop her son here and then one of us gets a couple of hours free. My guess is this is how it'll continue to work as he gets older.
 

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do any of these moms have hobbies similar to yours? say knitting. very common around here. So even if you don't want to chat about day to day stuff you could chat about knitting.
 

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Hi Monica!<br><br>
I'm one of the "oldies" you're having trouble with. :LOL<br><br>
Do any of the other mothers use a sling or CD or is there *anything* you have in common with one (or more hopefully) mom in the groups?<br><br>
There's a mom in one of our playgroups that drives me insane. Her kid reeks. He just stinks from disposies but the smell of it makes me want to vomit right now. And the mom has a funky smell of her own. Sure enough, like clockwork, this mom and kid want to play with us every time. I haven't found a way to avoid them yet. And I've challenged myself to find something marvelous about the mom but I entended my challenge mentally for a few months... <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/eyesroll.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="roll"><br>
So good luck on that one! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/winky.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Wink"><br><br>
Jen
 

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Uh, drop off playdates?<br><br>
My dd's all began drop-off playdates at age 4. In fact, they would have been really annoyed at me if I tried to hang around at their play dates at that age. In fact I remember once trying to stay and talk to the mom who was nice and my dd was like "Mommy?.....Aren't you going already!"<br><br>
Seriously though if your dd does not want to be dropped off now and these kids won't play without their moms either, you could try to do things together once in a while only.<br><br>
By 5 she probobly will be ready to play by herself.
 

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I don't know if I could drop off my 4 1/2 year old if I can't stand the mother of his/her friend. If I really can't stand a person, I really don't think I would feel comfortable leaving my DS for a play-date. I haven't encountered that situation so far though. I leave him with good friends and those friends come over too (with or without their mother). But I know the mothers and we like each other.<br><br>
I can see how this could change though. The other day, my son told me he wanted to have so and so over (someone from pre-school), and the little boy even asked me if he could come over soon. I have seen their parents, and they seem nice enough....next time I see them I might mention that the boys want to get together, and I will invite him over, and see how they handle it? Will the mother/father come with him? Will they drop him off? We'll see...<br><br>
We tend to go to play-dates together though because I have a 4 1/2 and a 2 1/2 yo so...most of the mothers I get together with have two kids who are the same age/or around the same age as my kids.
 
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