[moongloe]

hey girlies~

romm...when ds was a baby he never wanted to be put down, would scream if we tried. he wouldn't even tolerate swings, carriers, etc. basically we had to live in filth until he was almost one, when he began walking. it still took me a few years to get into a routine. since dh's family had never visited us pre-ds, they just assumed that i was a slob. i was mortified when i was very ill, and emil had to come over to take care of ds and me. the place was disgusting. since one embarrassing moment is never enough for me...i didn't get my act together. in mn sbil would pick dh up for work. one time he came in to get him...the place was a wreck. not just messy, but two bags of trash, sink full of dishes, house really dirty and smelled funky. the lovely man that he is, sbil pointed out the filth and aroma. that fun moment did it for me. don't get me wrong, my house is never totally clean. i keep the bedroom a horrid mess, because i don't care about it. containers, baskets and boxes are my passion lol. they are like spaces of tiny messes. i can just toss whatever belongs into them, and know where it is without having to put it away neatly. just figure out what areas of your home you personally need to have clean, and let the rest go without feeling badly about it.

rube...i'm sorry you're feeling crummy. did you get the candies yet? go to whole foods and get those, they also have candied ginger, and essential oils. a dab of peppermint on your wrist is helpful.

liss...oh no! i have read that witch hazel (kept in the fridge) on pads tucked into yer bottom is helpful for rhoids. sitz bath too. i didn't have them, so i've not tried either remedey.

pom...how did last night go?

gotta go. today we begin a new lesson, so i need to get the miscellaneous coloring printouts to go along with it.
~peace and love, mg

 

[Amoreena]

Hi everybody! Welcome to October . I was surprised to actually see some *color* in some leaves yesterday!

Cleaning -- two thoughts -- Flylady's wonderful philosophy of you're never behind, jump in where you are, etc. My take on Flylady is that it's totally flexible and there's no guilt, do what you can, while gently pushing yourself (not forcing, there's a difference) to do little things and be happy with the little things. The other thought is to check out www.packababy.com. It's a carrier for infants up to 45-pounders, and I know people who swear by it. THere are many carriers out there, of course. THey work for some people and not others. But I know for a fact there are many who manage to get some cleaning done while using carriers.

Sleeping -- fwiw, here's our experience. I'm not sure who posted and what the situation was, just have seen mention of cosleeping and getting enough sleep. At the moment we're in temp housing and our usual setup is in storage. Our usual setup is a king-size waterbed and a full-size bunkbed alongside. Even though there's the bunkbed the 4 of us sleep mostly in the waterbed -- that's me, dh, 4yo and 1.5yo. We imagine that gradually the boys will transition to the bunk bed and it will eventually migrate to a room for them. What we're doing now is sleeping in a regular queen size bed with a single scootched up alongside, and it's working well enough for the time being.

I have to say that co-sleeping has been the answer for us as far as getting enough sleep. It's not for everybody, that's for sure. With our first, we coslept, and I rarely felt sleep-deprived in the first three years even though my ds1 nursed every 2 hours or less around the clock for the first couple years of his life before he finally began tapering a bit. I've felt more sleep deprived since introducing nighttime EC into our lives with ds2 around a year old, but that's another story. Ds2 nurses way less than ds1. If we weren't ECing, and I'm not complaining because it's a choice we've made intentionally, we'd be getting good nights of sleep with the four of us in the bed. The factors that prevent our getting enough sleep these days, other than EC, which doesn't *always* deprive, but it is a less restful night, are mostly our own un-disciplined lifestyle as far as getting ourselves to bed at a decent hour. We have only ourselves to blame

Hope any of this helps...it's just our experience.

Ninette

 

[Pom]

Romm - I am a neat freak and am trying to deal with my new life as a slob. I occaissionaly have panic attacks where I make everyone around me stop and clean. It can get ugly. DH is a pack rat and piles of paper on our desk (in our living room) is what kills me the most. I'd love big hidden cabinets My major goal is to just keep things NEAT and the kitchen, bathrooms, laundry sanitary. It's horrifying to me, espec now that we have wall to wall carpet. Becuase our place is so small it gets so dirty so fast --that little Barbie kitchen floor of ours looks disgusting within minutes of walking through it. Sigh.

I focus on one big thing a day. Today is vaccuuming. Tomorrow probably laundry. The bathrooms wait for weekends when DH is home.

One approach you can try with babe is "sandwiching" cleaning in between play times -- and teaching him to wait...eg., "we'll read a book, then momma's goning to clean the kitchen, and then we'll read another book." Or get them to help as much as possible = hard I know, depending on the age and what chemicals you might use. But DD loves to help vaccuum, and sometimes dust. I let her squirt a water bottle on the fridge and dry it up.

PS MG's place always looks spotless to me, don't believe her!

MG - DD slept through the whole night AGAIN!! I thought she was going to wake up at 3 -- she was tossing and called out once, but got herself in a weird position and crashed back down. Hope it keeps up! Now if only I could get to bed earlier I'd notice the difference, LOL! So strange...it's as if she just wanted to know she COULD have it if she wanted. I mean, 2 days after we gave up? Coincidence?

 

[Pom]

Arrrrgh....DD was up last night from 3:20 - 5:30 practicing her Spanish ("A-qui! A-qui!" -- WTF?)!! She was perfectly happy and content -- no asking for books or tv, let me leave the room to go for water and the bathroom...she just lay there and waited. Pet the kitty. Stared at the ceiling. But would tap me or DH on the face every so often to make sure we weren't sleeping. And I nursed her!!! Right away!!! And later!!! At a certain point I may have even been forcing her, LOL, cuz I was just like -- You. Must. Sleep!

Sigh. Hopefully, this was just a weird brain working overtime thing and not the end of a new happy sleep pattern.

We finally got her back to sleep, but only until 6:45am. DH, I think, is gonna be late for work...

:

Hope y'all are sleeping!!

PS Romm - I never did vaccuum yesterday, and I doubt I'll be doing laundry today!

 

[moongloe]

hey now~

nin...i like flylady too (except she wears shoes to clean, and i have a no shoes in the house rule). i also dig organizedhome.com.
we used to have a queen and a full together. now we just scoot ds' toddler bed (he's small so still fits well) up to our queen each night.

pom...yay and then oh no. i think you gotta just say no to any night time play. just keep her in the bed, tell her 'shhhh sleep time' when she taps you or asks to go play, and pretend you're asleep for the rest of it. maybe she doesn't have a set internal clock, thinks that anytime she's up is time for books, movies, play??? help her to learn that this time is just for sleeping. no my house is not clean...it just plays clean on tv.

gotta get ready for my day. hope all the non posters are feeling terrible for not posting, err i mean i hope they're having fun.
~peace and love, mg

 

[Pom]

It's hard to pretend to sleep when someone is smacking your face!

She wasn't doing anything but lying in bed and petting the kitty and chatting to herself. I'm hoping it's just a freak.

 

[moongloe]

lol i've become a pro at it! you make that annoyed sleeping face like when someone is trying to wake you for school and you don't wanna get up. and you do the noise mmmmmmmmm. you know the one. and brush your face like you're swattting something. lol

 

[Turtle Woman]

Rube-I swear by papaya enzyme! Do you need any maternity clothes? I am 5'6" and 150lbs before pg and now. I was 180 when I delivered. Most are just comfy, plain and cotton and all are in good condition. You can have them. Hope you feel better.

Moongloe-I also love baskets and boxes. I am a packrat. We moved to a new place last december and got all new furniture. Our 2 car garage is full of crap that I keep promising to go through. dh wants to strangle me. I love having a garage to take stuff to that I don't know what to do with.

Ninnette-thanks for all the info. I looked at the carrier and I think I will order it. If you have one what material did you get and why?I have an ultimate baby wrap and like it because it goes on both shoulders. I can not use a sling because it only goes on one. I ruptured two discs in my low back in my first birth and had to have surgery when dd2 was one. My back is better but still hurts most days. I have to be very careful. my wrap has so much material it bugs sometimes especially in hot weather. How do you do EC?

Pom-I wish you the best. I tandem nursed my girls and dd2 nursed until she was 4. I remember those sleepless nights. ds is easy. he eats and goes right back to sleep.

Liss hope your doing well

Everyone-Thanks for all the sharing about cleaning. I am having someone come to clean my bathrooms and kitchen and vacuum my stairs. I have never done this before. I feel silly because I'm cleaning to have someone come clean the grossest part. Now I need to figure out how to maintain the clean as long as possible. I have flylady and organizedhome.com (thanks moongloe) bookmarked so i can read later. my typing is horrible ds is wrestling me.

I have to go. I'm procrastinating. I will do a reintro later cause I never did.

Hey are we going to make a plan to meet up?????????????

 

[SadiesMama]

All this talk about cleaning is depressing. I haven't been able to sit on my couch for weeks, thanks to the ever growing pil eof laundry that needs to be folded and put away.

My Mom may be coming for a week at the end of the month, little does she know she is going to help me get the house clean.

I would love to meet up with everyone. The only days that are completely bad for us are Mondays and Wednesdays.

Michele

 

[mary ann]

i agree about cleaning talk being depressing!!! i truly can't remember the last time our house was mopped, and every weekend dh says he is going to do it, and every weekend he gets busy with work or whatever and it goes unmopped. granted, we have a dog who cleans up all spills thoroughly, but STILL it is making me want to puke. at least dh sweeps regularly, and does the dishes a few times a week... i get SO ANNOYED when i think about my mom, who was a SAHM with 5 kids, and kept the house SPOTLESS and also had a perfect little vegetable garden, and rose bushes, etc. AND cooked meals, AND packed all our lunches... all i can manage to do is keep dd from killing herself!! aaaaaaaaarh!!!!!!!!

until dd was about 5 or 6 months old, i could never put her down, so i just kept her in the sling and tried to clean the best i could, but mainly dh did the cleaning, or when he came home, he'd hold dd or take her on a walk, and i'd race around the house like a crazy person just to keep the filth from overflowing down the stairs onto the street!!!

newbies: don't be fooled by MG--her house is totally perfect, except she is right about her bedroom, which is a complete pigsty!!!

rube, sorry to hear about your pukies!!!! hopefully they will pass soon!

big e (dd's adopted gramma) has been here since monday and just left this morning. i always feel so sad when she leaves.

she loves dd so much, and has so much fun with her, loves to hang out with my friends, loves to shop, eat, have happy hour, is a great conversationalist, gets along great with dh--basically just a delight to be with! i'm sad we don't live in the same town.

i have an idea for our get together, something we haven't done yet: an afternoon playdate during the week. it seems this might work, since i think we are all SAHMs, right? and many of us have dh's who don't want to sacrifice precious weekend family time... or dh's who work weekends. we could have this at someone's house, or at a park. what do you think?

 

[SadiesMama]

That sounds like a great idea.

(I wish I were a SAHM, but alas I'm a workin' woman)

 

[Turtle Woman]

Sorry to bring this up again but......My dh does not help me at home at all as far as cleaning but he also doesn't complain very much. Before we had ds I worked and went to school and we cleaned everything on Saturdays together. He would even cook sometimes and he had 2 jobs then. Now it's my job he says. He does help with the kids like getting them ready for school, baths, and stories. He works a lot so I guess it's ok. My question is do your dh's help you willingly or do you have to beg like me? I don't even know if I should expect the help. He works about 12 hours a day 5 days a week and some Saturdays. I really can't believe I brought this up but I'm really curious about others distribution practices

 

[Turtle Woman]

Ok I swear I won't bring cleaning up again after this. The woman who was going to help me clean today did not show up.

So I cleaned most of it myself because ds wants to sleep all day today. What a miracle. I saved $50 bucks so now I'm going to buy a packababy. Isn't it funny how nothing ever goes the way you think it will and actually I think my day worked out for the best this time. I have been so distraught over my house lately. I swear it's out of my system now. Thanks for being here so I can vent.

We are going to the Avocado Festival in Carpinteria this weekend. I grew up there and my mom helped run it for years. It's small but fun and I always run in to my friends from high school and their families.

OK here's my intro-
I was born in LA at home and lived here for six months. My parents were very natural and I am thankful for all they taught me about eating, nature, parenting, gardening, etc. I have always been a small town girl until two years ago I moved to Santa Monica to live with DH. Boy was that culture shock. My kids kept asking me what the billboards were and I would start crying. DH and I met in band camp when I was going into 9th grade in Carpinteria and were best friends all year. I moved away and we always remained friends. He used to bring me to see Phantom and Secret Garden and other shows in LA. I was married after high school and had my girls and we didn't see eachother for a few years. I moved back to Santa Barbara and as a single mom worked at the college as a peer advisor to other single moms going to school. (Any single moms I am a great resource.) I saw DH's mom at the market one day and he called me and we've been together ever since. I never thought I would ever live in LA in my life but I think I have adjusted well. I miss going for hikes and having beautiful beach sunsets every night but I visit SB often. Last summer we decided to make Parker and he is the sweetest thing. I had him at home which was my dream birth. I tried to have my first at home but had severe toxemia and then was too afraid to have dd2 at home because of my back so I had a nurse midwife in the hospital. DH works for a Custom Audio and Home Theatre Business. He loves his job. He is an amazing friend, hubby and father (except the cleaning part).

Enough book writing. I'm just lonely today. My neighbor got a job so I am missing her and her kids terribly and my other friend has sick kids and Parker well he's snoozing today. The girls are doing projects.

I hope you all are doing well and have great reasons for not posting and reading my crazy cleaning posts. I swear I'm done. I'm sending this before I write any more.

 

[rubelin]

Rommi (sorry 'bout the typo yesterday! I love your name, had a friend who spelled it with one M) Thanx for the mat. clothes offer. I don't know if I'd fit any of them, I'm ummm, a bit bigger than that

But I did do OK in some XL's from Motherhood with Ben and I'm about the same size now. I'll let you know when I start to need things that fit. Luckily I got a bunch of casual pants and shorts this year that are a bit big in the waist, so I hope not to be too desperate at least until Christmas.

As for division of labor... When we moved in, we decided the kitchen was DH's territory and the laundry was mine. As for everything else, well, I mostly do it when it bugs me and otherwise I've gotten good at ignoring it. We both slack on our perspective jobs sometimes, he more so cause he spends so much time out of the house. Oh and he's a bit of a slob so I try at least organizing the mess but he just piles stuff wherever.

An afternoon playdate would be cool, though Ben gets progressively more wound up after noon, so we'd have to not make it too late. Plus, since it is Halloween time, we could plan lots of little excursions to cool, autumny places culminating at the Pumpkin Patch the weekend of the 25th?

gotta run, 'night all!!

 

[Pom]

Hey all -

DH does a lot of the housework...(or at least, as much as I ask him to - since I've been home I've been trying to do more of it). He's great at cooking and kitchen cleaning and general tidying up and laundry...he stinks at bathrooms, paper piles ; overall I'm more a stickler about things then he is.

Um...I've forgotten everything else I was going to say. Duh.

 

[Amoreena]

Moongloe -- re Flylady, I don't believe in shoes either ...at most I might slide on a pair of slip-on sandals, but that's it.

Sleeping -- we're about to move (again) Monday, this time just within our city, and our sleep arrangemetns will again be fluctuating somewhat. In temp housing now we've had a queen and double scootched together. In our new place (rental house) we'll have to buy a queen size for my old bedframe (we didn't want to pay additional $500 deposit to use our king-size waterbed!), and then decide how to use the bunk bed mattresses ... one double we already have, and we'll buy a single for the top (have always used a futon folded in half...old futon!)....and my mother's coming to visit which complicates it a bit, but somehow it will all work out!

Rommamomma - packababy -- I was one of the trial testers when the packababy was in development. My ds was too far along and unaccustomed to anything but the one-should sling style, so he didn't go for the packababy, though I would have, conceptually. I passed my tester along to someone IRL who subsequently went gaga for it, because her months-old infant slept like crazy in the thing and she was able to get lots done. I haven't looked at the site for a while, but know there are numerous people who are loving it (the carrier). I was on a list for people who were testing/using the packababy, and there was lots of discussion along the way about adjustments, and that's part of how it came to be. So, to finally get back to your question ... I didn't actually order any particular fabric, because at the time there were no options! I don't even know what all is available now. I can say that I love the idea of two-shoulder carriers, but I've just gotten so accustomed to my old one-shoulder sling that I used with Ds1 that I've never spent the money to get something different. I would LOVE to try a Maya wrap and a Didymos, but don't want to shell out the bucks for new ones. I know of a way to make a pseudo-didy, but I'm no seamstress and have no sewing machine.

Tandem nursing -- BTDT! Still doing it actually, but not at night, and less and less at all, for that matter. The light at the end of the tunnel is getting brighter. But how well I remember those awful nights in the first year of TN when ds1 was still night nursing. Still, because we were in the same bed, at least I didn't have to move out of horizontal! There's a great new book by LLL on Tandem Nursing --- The Adventures of Tandem Nursing by Hilary Flower -- http://www.kellymom.com/reviews/review_tandem.html

Cleaning -- remember, baby steps! Do just one little thing at a time. Every tiny thing makes you feel better.

Meeting -- I'm game! Afternoons should be fine for me, even though ds2 often naps afternoons, but no matter, we go where/when we need to. This next week is going to be hectic with moving again, and my mother arrives for a 3-week visit on the 8th, but I'm sure she'd love coming along ...can't wait for her to see her grandsons!!!!! She hasn't seen them for over a year!!!!

Morning sickness --- have you ever tried seabands?

Rommi - thanks for the intro ))

Ninette
who's busy switching utilities into her family's name...

 

[moongloe]

hey girls~

sm...i can help with the laundry on the sofa. put it in a huge pile elsewhere, then you have a place to sit. if you saw how big my piles of laundry were (clean getting smaller as dirty gets larger, and oh what is that smell), you would be shocked.

pom...that man is a keeper. great to run into you and beanie yesterday!

ma...i'm sorry big e had to go home. totally sucks. thanks for backing me up on the bedroom/pigsty thing. don't compare yourself to your bio mom.

rube...nibbling on dry frosted shredded wheat helped a bit with the oogies. how are you doing?

rommi...you can talk about an issue as often as you like.

weekdays...sounds good to me. my schedule is very hectic right now, but i will rearrange to do a gathering. i miss those of you i haven't seen lately, and really wanna meet our sassy newbies!

halloween...what is everyone doing on halloween? should we have a costume party for the kids? i've been finding things to do with ds on other days (where he can wear his costume), but so far nothing i want to go to on the actual day...it's a friday btw. i will offer my place if people are interested.

update...dh and i are finally talking (thanks ma for pushing me). we made some huge leaps in our first talk, and dealt with even more stuff last night. we're gonna go to counseling, and we bought dr phil's relationship book and workbook. he even is going to go to solo sessions to help him finally let go of horrible things from childhood.
more importantly....i went down another pant size!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

cleaning...dh does his own laundry, i do the rest. ds is in charge of putting away his toys. containters and slipcovers are my biggest aids...and a door on my bedroom lol.

early i know, but i want to give enough notice...i want us to have a tribal thanksgiving next month. start emailing me with dates that are good for you.

~peace and love, chatty mg

 

[rubelin]

'mornin! Dan had to be at work at the butt-crack of dawn, so I was up for momma duty

I got a good night's sleep, but am still so tired. Geez, I can't wait for the 1st trimester to be over! Nothing much is helping the oogies, but at least it's not too severe, it was much worse with Ben. I am trying to eat regularly and get enough protein and I think that's helping. I also seem to have caught some freaky Moongloe sickness... I have the WORST fry craving, lol!!!

MG - so glad to hear that you & Dh are working things out. And you do know that your mess of a bedroom is the only reason I can be your friend

A Halloween Party sounds cool. We usually go Trick or Treating on my parent's street, just to the neighbors we've known forever, but an afternoon thing would be fun.

Unfortunately, Thanksgiving (and most every major holiday) is a family thing for us, we'll be visiting Dan's dad. The holidays are so frustrating for me, we travel so much to see all of Dan's extended families.

OK, gotta go, hope you all have a lovely weekend!

 

[moongloe]

hey now~

rube...not ON thanksgiving silly.

ds and i went thrift shopping again today. i bought two sassy linen skirts one in size 6 and the other a 4!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i was so thrilled that i had a soda and bbq chips to celebrate. i know it is not a big deal, but to finally be nearing my pre-pg size after all these years really feels good. on that note....
heeheehee
yesterday i went to wf alone for some groceries. when i got back to the front gate, i put my bags down to get my keys. out of the corner of my eye i saw a very hot guy (i'd guess in 20s) coming toward the building. i picked up my stuff and went to unlock the gate. he ran up and put his hand over mine on the doorknob. i looked up at him and he just smiled. i swear i felt my insides turn to jello. he opened the door for me and i squeaked out a pathetic 'thanks'. he said 'my pleasure' and smiled again. oh maaaaaaaan he was yummy. what a fricking ego boost that was. *sigh*

~peace and love, mg

 

[SadiesMama]

Oh to be able to fit into my pre-pg clothes........ (personally - I don't think my hips will ever be the same again.)