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4 Posts
Hi moms, I'm new here but am hoping to find a like minded community of new mamas! I'm due in 6 weeks, and ever since I found out I was expecting I have been nervous about letting my expectations as a new mom be known to friends and family. I tend to always be the "helper" but never one who gets help or respect back. Also, my hubby and I like to do things a bit differently than mainstream...
Long story short, after taking a month to carefully write and rewrite a loving but firm email to all friends and family who will want to be involved with baby, the guilt tripping began only 30 minutes after hitting "send".
I firmly and proudly stand by the guidelines my hubby and I have come up with after much deliberation. No visitors for the first 2 weeks after our home birth. His family is traveling to many international airports (for vacation, by choice) around the time baby will be born, so we have asked them to give us another 2 weeks after their return to the country to make sure no illness manifests. I think they were going to hop off an international flight and come straight to our house!
MIL, SIL, and my youngest sister have all since made me feel bad, guilty, rude, selfish, and stupid for our choice. They say "we understand but understanding doesn't mean our feelings aren't hurt". Well too damn bad. Sorry I didn't consider your grown up "feelings" when getting pregnant and deciding to begin a family!
Anyone else have this problem? I need the strength and assurance that as the new mama, its my baby, my home, my choices.
Any tips on how to handle the guilt that always seems to come from the in-laws? Sorry for the rant, it can be lonely being pregnant. Thanks in advance! Much love!
Long story short, after taking a month to carefully write and rewrite a loving but firm email to all friends and family who will want to be involved with baby, the guilt tripping began only 30 minutes after hitting "send".
I firmly and proudly stand by the guidelines my hubby and I have come up with after much deliberation. No visitors for the first 2 weeks after our home birth. His family is traveling to many international airports (for vacation, by choice) around the time baby will be born, so we have asked them to give us another 2 weeks after their return to the country to make sure no illness manifests. I think they were going to hop off an international flight and come straight to our house!
MIL, SIL, and my youngest sister have all since made me feel bad, guilty, rude, selfish, and stupid for our choice. They say "we understand but understanding doesn't mean our feelings aren't hurt". Well too damn bad. Sorry I didn't consider your grown up "feelings" when getting pregnant and deciding to begin a family!
Anyone else have this problem? I need the strength and assurance that as the new mama, its my baby, my home, my choices.
Any tips on how to handle the guilt that always seems to come from the in-laws? Sorry for the rant, it can be lonely being pregnant. Thanks in advance! Much love!