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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hi working mamas. I'm looking for some advice. I'm an attorney at a big manhattan lawfirm and am VERY ready for a new job. I've just had it all around. That, and I fear that the longer I stay at this big firm and the more senior I get, the less marketable I will become.

I've been in the process of looking for a new job since before I found out that I was pregnant. Since I had already started looking, and I've wanted options, I've even started the process with a couple of places over the past couple of weeks. Now that I'm getting close to the end of the first trimester, and I still have yet to complete the process with a couple of places, I'm starting to get anxious. I had plan to tell all prospective employers that I am pregnant at a certain point. I know I don't have to under the law (I am a lawyer!), but I want to gain the trust of a future employer and not have them think I am trying to put one over on them. However, I am starting to feel skiddish and fearful that I will end up without any offers and have to stay where I am.

I know there are issues with maternity leave and health insurance (I'm pretty sure I can get covered through my husband), but I am willing to make some sacrifices (such as unpaid leave, maybe shorter than I would have at my current job). Also, I'm not fearful that none of the places I've applied will pan out, and that I could get stuck where I am. Should I start applying to additional places now?

Any advice on these issues, and anecdotes from experience, would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!!
 

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I wish I knew the right answer for this!
I have been applying on and off for jobs for a long time now (I was at my job for 3yrs and hated every minute) and got a job offer on thurs 2 weeks ago, then was fired friday from the old job. I'm 99.9% sure they found out I was looking seriously.
:

I'm now 23w pregnant, and start the new job next week, and I have NO idea whom I should even tell!
I got my "soft offer letter" today finially, so now would be a good time, but do I tell HR? the guy who hired me who I *think* would be my supervisor?

I feel like i'm pulling something over on them, but in all honesty...this is the job i've been DREAMING of for years now....I've had the most incredible bad luck for the last 6yrs as far as jobs go. Verbal abuse, bad pay, etc.

I can't think of much I could wear monday when I start either, that won't seem like i'm pregnant....i've got a little basketball tummy now
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Thanks, Shan.

As an attorney, I do know that you did not have to tell the employer that you are pregnant. If I was in your shoes, I would tell both HR and the person you think you are going to work for. The person who hired you is going to find out eventually, and I would want to be the person to tell him. And, no need to apologize for it -- I would tell him matter of fact and let him know that you have thought about your situation and that you are committed to your new job. I think he'll appreciate that. Talking to HR simultaneously will allow you to work out logistics.

All of this being said, I think how you want to treat this is a very personal decision. You are the one who is going to be in this job for the rest of your pregnancy and probably longer. I'm in a slightly different boat in that: (1) I don't have an offer yet; and (2) particularly with prosecutorial type work (which I'm looking for), I think it is important for me to be as upfront as possible in order to demonstrate my character, which I think is important for the positions.

Re: wardrobe issues, I'm having them all the time these days, particularly with the heat wave we're having in NYC. I would wear something you feel comfortable in and good about yourself, regardless of whether you "show" or not. Afterall, it is your first day of work and you want to feel your best.

Good luck -- please keep me posted with how it goes!
 

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I had a horrible job that I just HAD to get out of when I was pregnant with DS. I also work in a professional field and had been promoted to a senior position and knew that if I stayed too long there it would be hard to get another job. There just weren't that many comparable jobs out there and if you want to take a step down, people really start to ask questions, you know? Plus, the job was just horrible for a lot of other reasons that I won't go into. When I found out I was pregnant I first figured that I would just stay until I was back from maternity leave, then start looking. A couple months into the pregnancy, though, and I knew I had to start right away.

I was up front about being pregnant right away. It wasn't always appropriate in the first interviews, but by the time I was in second or subsequent interviews and talking with the person who would be my boss I felt that it was something I needed to discuss. Part of it was making sure the environment was good for me and would be flexible as I neeeded it to be. DH is a SAHD, so I don't need as much flexibility as some WOHMs, but I still wanted to make sure I had the flexibility in the areas that I needed it. The people I interviewed with appreciated it- as I got farther along in my pregnancy it became obvious that I was, in fact, pregnant, but by law they couldn't ask me about it. (I did a third interview the week before my due date and another third interview at 3 days postpartum). I think being upfront about it was good in building trust and for being able to talk openly about expectations.

I am working now in a job I interviewed for then. It is a great job and I am so glad I went about things the way I did. Good luck to you.
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
G&B'sMama said:
I also work in a professional field and had been promoted to a senior position and knew that if I stayed too long there it would be hard to get another job. There just weren't that many comparable jobs out there and if you want to take a step down, people really start to ask questions, you know?

Thanks, Erika -- Your reply makes a lot of sense to me -- in particular, I am in a very similar position to what you describe above. I too feel that the longer I am here, the less marketable I become.

My current plan is to take the exact same tact -- not divulge on a first interview, but share the information before the employer is about to extend an offer. In the case of a prosecutorial job, I already disclosed in my second interview. I thought it was important for building trust. I still have more rounds to go (hopefully, if I advance), but I think the honesty actually earned me points. I don't know if private sector jobs are going to be as understanding.

Did places make you feel bad about applying while pregnant? I fear that places are going to discount me or somehow hold it against me.
 
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