Many hugs, mama! Your story has touched me - it is almost exactly what my mom has been going through with my dad for years and years - I'll pray for your strength in getting the help and attention that you so deserve - I'm so sorry that you've had to go through all of this.
You are a wonderful person, and deserve so much better - the most simple things in life are love and safety from another person, and what you have been deprived of from your husband is a terrible loss.
Please, please keep yourself safe. Your voice is heard here, and you will never be manipulated here like you have been before. Stay strong, mama!