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We are expecting our 5th child, a son in August.<br><br>
My older 2 boys are circ'ed, and my dh is not.<br><br>
We are really debating having the baby done... but I am leaning on the 'against' it side.<br><br>
Here are my ?'s:<br><br>
How will the child will be treated in school (Has anyone noticed a problem with this? (Showering, etc.))<br><br>
What about him feeling 'different' from his brothers? (Who are much older than he is anyway, They will be 12 & 8.5 when he enters this world)<br><br>
Is it hard to take care of? (Ok, no laughing!) I don't have a clue how I could/would clean around the head of the penis with the foreskin there. Dh is a twit sometimes, so he's no help, and he laughs at me everytime I ask him. (Think smack the hubby! LOL)<br><br>
If we decide to do it, I wouldn't want it done until baby is at least 8days old, and our hospital says they will only do it within the first 24hrs, or after 1yr old.... so where can I get it done after the 8days? (Without waiting until baby is 1yr old?)<br><br>
TIA~ Jodi
 

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<i>How will the child will be treated in school (Has anyone noticed a problem with this? (Showering, etc.))</i><br><br>
My eldest is ending first grade and I've yet to hear of a problem. He goes to the Y to do judo and nobody's said anything - he does shower there. (Not at school.) He knows that some boys have their penis circumcised as babies and some don't. Its really not been an issue at all.<br><br><br><br><i>What about him feeling 'different' from his brothers? (Who are much older than he is anyway, They will be 12 & 8.5 when he enters this world)</i><br><br>
I would explain to the older brothers. The youngest probably won't think anything of it mainly because he'll be so much younger. Either way, you can tell them that when the eldests were born, you believed one way but now you know its not necessary so you opted not to.<br><br><br><i>Is it hard to take care of? (Ok, no laughing!) I don't have a clue how I could/would clean around the head of the penis with the foreskin there. Dh is a twit sometimes, so he's How will the child will be treated in school (Has anyone noticed a problem with this? (Showering, etc.))</i><br><br>
You don't clean around the head of the penis with the foreskin there! You wipe the outside and that's it. Never try to retract it. The glans is dark red or purple-ish and shiney. Its supposed to be an internal part of the body. It won't like being "exposed" really. There isn't anything to clean anyway. Any smegma that DOES accumulate there will be part of the natural separation process. Boys don't need to retract and rinse until puberty! Please see my website (link in my sig) and look in the blue menu bar for "Caring for the penis".<br><br><br><br><i>If we decide to do it, I wouldn't want it done until baby is at least 8days old, and our hospital says they will only do it within the first 24hrs, or after 1yr old.... so where can I get it done after the 8days? (Without waiting until baby is 1yr old?)</i><br><br>
You'd probably have to find a pediatrician who would do it. There are disadvantages to doing it at ANY age. Eight days has nothing over any other age, except supposedly the clotting of the blood is a little better "established" but I wouldn't see that as a major reason to do it. Why not have a read of the Mothers Stories at my site before you decide to go ahead with it? I'd hate to have you come BACK here writing your own! (Its under "Mothers: Mothers Stories" in the blue menu bar.)
 

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My son was just born 6 weeks ago, and I, too AGONIZED over the decision. I made myself crazy doing research online, at the library and making phone calls to doctors/hospitals and friends.<br><br>
In a nutshell, what I found out is that WE make a much bigger deal out of it than the kids ever do! My friend has 4 sons, and she said she just explained that some babies do, and some babies don't, and that was that-- "OK, mommy, can I have a cookie?"<br><br>
I also found out that I obsessed with the decision before the delivery, but once he was here, and I saw his sweet face, and adorable (if I do say so myself!) intact penis, I couldn't imagine changing him, let alone <i>hurting</i> him! There was no decision to be made... we'd leave him as perfect as he already was.<br><br>
Lastly, I haven't really given it much thought since. His little penis is low maintenance, and I've decided that if there is any social problems later, we will deal with them then. Worst case scenario, when he's old enough, if he really wants to be circed, we'll do it then. At least he'll have the option to make the decision for himself. For now, I'm just enjoying my beautiful baby, and feeling pretty great about our decision. (and finding new things to obsess about! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol">: )
 

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Jodi:<br><br>
Only the last question is stupid so we'll answer all of the rest.<br><br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>JodiM</strong></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">We are expecting our 5th child, a son in August.<br><br>
My older 2 boys are circ'ed, and my dh is not.<br><br>
We are really debating having the baby done... but I am leaning on the 'against' it side.</div>
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<b>Good for you!</b><br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">Here are my ?'s:<br><br>
How will the child will be treated in school (Has anyone noticed a problem with this? (Showering, etc.))</td>
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This year, the intact/circumcised ratio is almost exactly 50/50. It would be a really stupid kid that would say anything. He would have half of his classmates on him like a coat of paint and the other half would be saying "How can he be so stupid?"<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">What about him feeling 'different' from his brothers? (Who are much older than he is anyway, They will be 12 & 8.5 when he enters this world)</td>
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My Father was the only one in the family of 7 brothers who was circumcised and the only problem he had with it is that he was impotent 20 years younger than all of the others. If there is a problem, it will be with your older sons and that should be addressed. Just explain how medicine has changed over the last two years. Never minimize their loss. That is more damaging than full-in-your-face honesty about what happened.<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">Is it hard to take care of? (Ok, no laughing!) I don't have a clue how I could/would clean around the head of the penis with the foreskin there. Dh is a twit sometimes, so he's no help, and he laughs at me everytime I ask him. (Think smack the hubby! LOL)</td>
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It's exactly as hard to take care of as a finger. You just wash the outside and let the inside take care of itself exactly as you did with your daughters.<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">If we decide to do it, I wouldn't want it done until baby is at least 8days old, and our hospital says they will only do it within the first 24hrs, or after 1yr old.... so where can I get it done after the 8days? (Without waiting until baby is 1yr old?)<br><br>
TIA~ Jodi</td>
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Don't even go there! Don't even think about it! Why would you want to hurt your son? Why would you want him to be less than he can be? Why is it only important to look like Daddy when Daddy is circumcised? Let this son look like Daddy (As if it would be important to him.)<br><br><br><br><br>
Frank
 

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It's incredibly easy to care for an intact penis--nature made it that way. You just wipe around the outside--you don't (and shouldn't) retract it at all. Some point in time before puberty, your son's foreskin will become retractable on its own. Then you can teach your son to gently pull back his foreskin, wash with warm water (no soap on the inside), and then put his foreskin back in place.<br><br><br>
As for the "school" thing, I don't know because my son isn't that old yet. But, as I said to my sis, I absolutely refuse to let potential future high school bullies dictate how I will raise my son. What if he gets picked on for not having a tatoo? Should we get him one now, just in case? Should we even get him one then, just for that reason? It really does get silly, if you start to think about it. Kids will always be teased for something, unfortunately. That's not enough reason to circumcise.<br><br>
"When you know better, you do better." --Maya Angelou
 

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I just wanted to point out that your baby's penis is not supposed to be cleaned like your dh cleans his. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/nono.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="nono"><br><br>
With an infant, the foreskin is fused to the head of the penis...much like your fingernail is fused to your finger. Its like that for a reason...to keep poop and other yucky stuff out...which is why there is no need for you to clean beneath it. All you do is wipe the outside.<br><br>
Over time those natural bonds between the foreskin and glans will breakdown, and the foreskin will become retractable...like your dhs. At that point, your ds, and ONLY your ds should start to gently pull it back and rinse it with water. He will be the one to figure it out, and trust me, when little boys get in the tub, sometimes the only thing that gets clean is their penis LOL. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/banana.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="banana"><br><br>
Premature retraction is probably the #1 cause of foreskin problems. If you have a doc who tells you to retract your baby's foreskin then pick up your baby and run away! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/Bolt.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="bolt"><br><br>
So anyway, don't sweat the hygine stuff its no big deal.<br><br>
Take the WHOLE baby home and enjoy him!<br><br>
Good luck to ya! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/biggrinbounce.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="bgbounce"><br><br>
Christina mom to 2 happy healthy intact boys and 2 happy healthy intact girls! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hide.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hide">:
 

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Jodi-<br><br>
Congrats on thinking about leaving him intact.<br><br>
How will the child will be treated in school (Has anyone noticed a problem with this? (Showering, etc.))<br>
My dh said more problems would come up from admitting you were checking out the guys in the shower, yk?<br><br>
What about him feeling 'different' from his brothers? (Who are much older than he is anyway, They will be 12 & 8.5 when he enters this world)<br><br>
Admit you didn't know then what you know now. Your older sons will prolly say ok and that's it.<br><br>
Is it hard to take care of? (Ok, no laughing!) I don't have a clue how I could/would clean around the head of the penis with the foreskin there. Dh is a twit sometimes, so he's no help, and he laughs at me everytime I ask him. (Think smack the hubby! LOL)<br><br>
I honestly do not see how the intact penis could be easier to care for. Leave it alone. that's it. You don't retract because that will hurt and cause problems. The foreskin will retract by itself when he's older.<br><br>
If we decide to do it, I wouldn't want it done until baby is at least 8days old, and our hospital says they will only do it within the first 24hrs, or after 1yr old.... so where can I get it done after the 8days? (Without waiting until baby is 1yr old?)<br><br>
Any dr. should do it. But ( I'm not trying to snarky! I swear.) have you watched a circ? Watching a video of a circ changes many parents minds. All I had to do was describe a circ to my dh and he was saying 'no way!' Again, I'm not trying to be snotty, please don't be offended.
 

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<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>JodiM</strong></div>
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How will the child will be treated in school (Has anyone noticed a problem with this? (Showering, etc.))</div>
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My dp is not circumcized, and he was never treated any differently in school because of that. I have specifically asked him about locker room situations, etc., and he said that it was never once an issue.<br><br>
Circumcision rates are down to 50% now and still falling. By the time your son gets to school, circumcized boys will be in the minority.<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>JodiM</strong></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">What about him feeling 'different' from his brothers? (Who are much older than he is anyway, They will be 12 & 8.5 when he enters this world)</div>
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I can absolutely promise you that he would rather have his foreskin than be like his brothers.<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>JodiM</strong></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Is it hard to take care of?</div>
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Absolutely not. A penis that has not been circumcized requires NO special care.<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>JodiM</strong></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I don't have a clue how I could/would clean around the head of the penis with the foreskin there.</div>
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A penis that has not been circumcized requires NO special care. You don't have to clean around the head of the penis. The foreskin does it for you. That's its job.<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>JodiM</strong></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">If we decide to do it, I wouldn't want it done until baby is at least 8days old, and our hospital says they will only do it within the first 24hrs, or after 1yr old.... so where can I get it done after the 8days? (Without waiting until baby is 1yr old?)</div>
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There are people who will do it after 8 days but before a year, but please please please I'm begging you, don't have it done at all. Please read this article:<br><a href="http://www.mothering.com/10-0-0/html/10-1-0/10-1-circumcision85.shtml" target="_blank">http://www.mothering.com/10-0-0/html...cision85.shtml</a><br>
and come back here if you have any questions.
 
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