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~March Mama Chat: March 29th - April 4th~

1K views 17 replies 14 participants last post by  lanielayne 
#1 ·
How is it going mamas? Who is still waiting? How are all the PP mamas and their new little ones? It seems everyone is so busy and I am the only bored one checking in all the time!
 
#2 ·
things are going pretty well over at our house. dd2 sleeps 2-3 hours at a time during the day and 3-4 hours at a time at night. dd1 is loving having a baby around; she always wants to give "lovies" by laying her cheek against dd2's and likes to hold dd2 a lot.
just when i was getting used to things around home with the new little one, everything has changed. dh left yesterday morning for india, leaving me a single parent for the next two weeks. fortunately my parents live close by and my church community is planning meals for me for the next couple of weeks.
anyway, dd1 is getting restless. better run!
 
#3 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by galincognito View Post
things are going pretty well over at our house. dd2 sleeps 2-3 hours at a time during the day and 3-4 hours at a time at night. dd1 is loving having a baby around; she always wants to give "lovies" by laying her cheek against dd2's and likes to hold dd2 a lot.
i could have written that same exact thing except replace DD2 with DS!!!

At 6 days PP, we are doing well. so far, adjusting from 1 to 2 has been great...not too hard but, then again, dh is home and basically keeping DD totally entertained while I am with the new babe. Also, it's only been 6 days and we are hardly back to our normal day to day life. It's hard to believe that its been almost a week since the birth...but, at the same time, it feels like he has been around for ages. How does time do that? The hardest thing for me so far have been the baby blues (other post on those) though they seem to be better today. yesterday though, i was really regretting freezing my placenta without eating any of it first. I am loving having a new little boy in the house - it is so sweet how much DD loves him. Today we went out for a walk -the first time DS has been out of the house and the first time I have been out of bed since the birth. I was tired afterwards but I feel pretty good all things considered. I am not really able to stay in bed for super long - it is hard on me to just sit there. But, this time is so precious - they are only newborns for a short while so i am trying to love this guy up as much as I can!!

Hope all you other mama's are doing well. How many of you are still waiting? I love reading about the new ones who are joining us
 
#4 ·
I'm still waiting... My first due date was March 15 and I managed to get it switched to March 21st to keep the threat of induction at bay. It was a good move.

I have had a really bad cold since Thursday so if I'm glad the baby is choosing to wait until I feel better. I was thinking I'd get a sweep when I see the midwife on Tuesday but if I'm not better, I'll postpone my app't to the end of the week.
 
#5 ·
Still waiting here too - and feeling a tiny bit lonely too, I miss the flurry of activity of just a few weeks ago.

My due date was March 25, so I'm 5 days past due now, hard to say where things are at. My MW does not do internal examinations. I lost a bit of my plug on Friday at the gym, and have felt lots of low backache and quite a few contractions, but they're not getting more painful and I hardly slow down through them, so I'm thinking I'm a ways away yet.

DH and I DTD tonight, though not specifically to encourage baby - we really want baby to come 100% on its own time if at all possible.

I have a job interview on Tuesday (LOL - I know, it's a long story), so I'm kind of hoping baby waits until at least Wednesday. And if I have to wait that long, I'd like to wait until my ex is back in town with my two olders kids, which is Saturday - and that's only 6 days away, I can wait.
 
#6 ·
2 weeks and 2 days PP and we're starting to get the hang of each other's schedules. SO goes back to work tomorrow, so I'm kinda dreading that. I'm hoping I can keep myself busy by catching up on house cleaning and various other activities. I've also got DD's 2wk exam to keep me busy tomorrow, hopefully.

She's sleeping about 2 hours each nap during the day and around 4 hours at night. Her times vary, it seems, every 2 days, though. Just like in the womb, she's really active (and fussy and wanting to eat every hour in the evenings) for 2 days, then she has 2 days where she mostly sleeps in between feedings.

Her poop started to get a little green-tinged last night, so I'm trying the block feeding technique. Methinks it's due to a slight fore/hindmilk imbalance from A) initially worrying too much about the clock and feeding her for 10 minutes on each boob instead of letting her pull herself off when she's done and B) I have a really, really slow letdown (thus, by sticking to only 10 minutes, who knows how much of that she was really getting milk for). I know it's not a huge issue, but hopefully her poop will go back to orange soon.

Dealing with The Blues, but they're getting better. I'm hoping my MW will clear me for more exercise this week. I'm dying to get back into a regular workout schedule again.
 
#7 ·
DD is 8 days old now. This week has actually seemed to be a long one. I love her dearly, but she tends to be very fussy, and it's frustrating for the whole family. I don't know if it's just a newborn thing, if we're doing something wrong, or if it's just her personality, but she cries a LOT.

She wants to be on my boob almost 24/7, and she often needs it to fall asleep. She won't sleep in her Pack N Play, but she will sleep in her swing and car seat. I think it's because those make her feel cuddled, and the Pack N Play is like a big, giant, scary space for her. She's the most adorable thing ever when she's in a good mood, and she makes the funniest noises! She snorts, snores, makes noises that sound like a dinosaur (I kid you not), squeals, etc.

Anyway, she often cries when we change her diaper, change her clothes, and many other random times after she's been fed and changed and cuddled.
She will calm down several ways at various times, but the boob is the only thing that is 100% guaranteed. I really hope she grows out of this, because it's causing a lot of stress on everyone, and I feel like I can never get up to pee, shower, eat, etc, without her crying (unless she is asleep). DH has gone back to work as of this evening, so it's going to be double duty for me just trying to make sure I can take care of BOTH (DD & I) of our basic needs.

Also, I think I may have overactive letdown, b/c the last two days DD has been spitting up a lot, spitting out my nipple sometimes, crying, and coughing when at the breast.
I guess I need to ask more q's about that in the Breastfeeding forum.

Lastly, I've had the baby blues a bit, too. The biggest thing has been realizing that my relationship with DH will never be the same. We are parents now, and Isobel has to come first. It's tough getting used to that, and couple time is pretty much non-existent now, let alone time for ourselves. I know things will get better, but I just don't know when. I've been really, really weepy at times: sometimes because I was happy & looking at DD, realizing how beautiful and amazing she is, other times because DH and I got into arguments about how to respond to her crying, or about how he feels left out of the process since he can't feed her right now. *sigh* My baby means the world to me, and so does my husband... honestly you have no idea how much of an emotional roller coaster being a parent can be until you actually are one.
 
#8 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by filiadeluna View Post
She wants to be on my boob almost 24/7, and she often needs it to fall asleep. She won't sleep in her Pack N Play, but she will sleep in her swing and car seat. I think it's because those make her feel cuddled, and the Pack N Play is like a big, giant, scary space for her.

Also, I think I may have overactive letdown, b/c the last two days DD has been spitting up a lot, spitting out my nipple sometimes, crying, and coughing when at the breast.
I guess I need to ask more q's about that in the Breastfeeding forum.

Lastly, I've had the baby blues a bit, too. The biggest thing has been realizing that my relationship with DH will never be the same. We are parents now, and Isobel has to come first. It's tough getting used to that, and couple time is pretty much non-existent now, let alone time for ourselves. I know things will get better, but I just don't know when. I've been really, really weepy at times: sometimes because I was happy & looking at DD, realizing how beautiful and amazing she is, other times because DH and I got into arguments about how to respond to her crying, or about how he feels left out of the process since he can't feed her right now. *sigh* My baby means the world to me, and so does my husband... honestly you have no idea how much of an emotional roller coaster being a parent can be until you actually are one.

The first few weeks are really, really hard. It will get easier, I promise! Plan to give yourself a date night every so often, knowing that other people are perfectly capable of looking after your baby. It is important for your relationship!

Do you swaddle your baby? It took me a while to realize with my son that although he fought being swaddled, it's what helped him sleep.

For the breastfeeding, try holding baby so that her body is down towards your legs and she's in a more upright position when drinking. She may just be getting used to your milk as it comes in in more quantity.

It's so hard when babies are fussy, but it passes! We also found that if we wore Aidan and went for a walk, he'd calm right down. Then we could have some peaceful together time.
 
#9 ·
I could have written luna's post.

Nathan is ten days old. He does not really nap. I kept track yesterday because I thought for sure I was exaggerating, and he slept an hour from 7pm til 8pm, then from 6am this morning til 7am, and from 1pm til 2pm. He will fall asleep nursing, but if you take him off, he wakes up furious. He honestly is nursing the rest of the time (he's nursing right this second, in fact, balanced on my lap with the keyboard on the bed in front of me) Great news is that he will nurse laying down, so we can cosleep and I can get about twenty minutes of sleep before we have to flip over and nurse the other side.

He despises diaper changes, clothes changes, although he loves warm baths, and he's starting to love his massages.

Thank goodness my dh was able to stay home for two weeks. The other kids definitely have been a huge help, but I don't know how things will go once he goes back to work. I don't know if I've had baby blues, per se...I have had ppd before. Right now just some frustration from not being in control of situations like I normally am. Esp since I can't get up and down the stairs like normal, so I'm kind of trapped up in the master bedroom OR downstairs. def don't like that feeling.
 
#10 ·
I'm still admittedly very new to this, but I wanted to chime in here...

My son is a month and 2 days old. I feel SO MUCH BETTER now than I did even a week or so ago. He has really "come around" recently, letting us get to know him better (his cues and such) and getting to know us better, too (for example, he knows now that when my husband hands him to me, he will be nursed, and there's no need to keep screaming). The first week was so hard, I felt sad and scared and frustrated all the time. The second week was hard, but I had resigned myself to it, and was feeling a bit better physically myself, which helped. We had some trouble with nursing and that frustrated me, but I also just accepted that things would always suck. But around the third week, I started to feel more hopeful. I wore him in the sling for the first time and it helped so much. I saw a midwife about my nipple soreness and got some ointment. I still had some really bad moments, but we started to figure each other out around then. In his fourth week, I feel like things really started to change and I think my son is feeling better, too. I still feel frustrated with my husband over little things (like, if I have to get up to nurse several times a night, he should at least deal with diapers), but I no longer feel hopeless.

Anyway, I think we've overcome a hurdle, and I have hope for you all, too. It's an important stage and enjoy what you can, but also know that babies are so dynamic and they're learning and growing and changing everyday, and your relationship will change and improve, too.
 
#11 ·
I am 1 week 1 day postpartum. We are doing awesome! I am overjoyed at how easy this baby is. He sleeps all the time...so well in fact that we are well rested and actually have to wake him up to feed him. My nipples are doing great, but starting to spring leaks every now and then. I have been in total bliss since the birth...maybe because I am eating the encapsulated placenta. And I am so in love with my partners. Last night pappa and I had a good cry together about how in love we are with each other and this baby.

My stitches have already dissolved and I went for a hike a few days ago. I look forward to being able to get on an exercise routine and loose the 50 pounds I gained. Overall though I am happy with my pp body...I managed to get by without any stretch marks. Now if I could just get the bleeding to let up...

I love this little boy. He is happy, calm and barely ever cries. Sometimes he fusses at my boobs at night and my DP has to take him for a little bit to get him to calm down. Overall though we are doing really well. I am so happy to be a mom, never thought I would say that.
 
#12 ·
I am glad to hear I'm not the only one feeling stressed out right now. I love my baby more than anything in the world, but I feel so guilty because I am not able to spend as much quality time with my husband now, let alone do much of anything for myself. Being a parent really does change your life in so many ways. I am supposed to be so 100% elated and joyous right now, but I'm only maybe 80%, and it makes me feel like a bad mom. I know she is still just a newborn, and that she won't be quite as needy later on.

However, when she is nursing almost constantly it is hard to even get sleep, eat, shower, pee... all those basic things, let alone find cuddle time with my husband. Hell, I've had a few days since being home from the hospital where I didn't eat enough (having to hold/nurse her all the time), and was pale as a ghost. It's a delicate balance to take care of myself enough to make sure I can take care of her.

My husband has been amazing in helping me, as much as he can considering he's back at work as of this week, but I feel like he needs to be pampered in some way too. We are going through this together, you know? *sigh* All I can say is that going through labor with my husband by my side made me love him more than I ever have before. He was my rock. He showed as much strength as I did, I think, and now I feel like I need to be SuperMom/Wife and take care of both of them.

What do I possibly have time to do that will let my husband know that he still means the world to me?
 
#13 ·
My little one is 4 weeks tomorrow. I am doing ok adjusting to 3 little ones. My ds has been acting out a bit so I am trying to spend more time with him. My dd is like a little mama so she is good. DD2 is doing good except she caught my cold this week so the nights haven't been fun. She sleeps 3-4 hours and then she is stuffed up and isn't the happiest. She has lots of gas too at night which doesn't wake her up but she is stirring so much to get it out that it wakes me up. DD2 is a very good nurser. She is always wanting to nurse which is probably why she is getting so big. She has just started to puke up but that doesn't happen very often. I am doing good emotional. It only seems to be on the weekends that I have my meltdowns. I am not sure why that is.
That is all for now b/c DD2 is waking up.
 
#14 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by filiadeluna View Post
What do I possibly have time to do that will let my husband know that he still means the world to me?

Totally understand that! We're both such huge cuddlers that it's really put a strain on us to have to do things in shifts - like eat, relax, etc. Three things that I did to show my SO that he's appreciated:

- His birthday was this past Wednesday. I told him he wasn't allowed to lift a finger and that he was to do whatever he wanted the whole day. I did all the diaper changes, baby chores, cleaning and cooking while he played video games and watched Bond movies (he did help with baby stuff, but it was because he wanted to, not because he felt he had to give me a break). It was hard, but it was the least I could do because he's been there so much for me through all of this.

- Once DD gets put down for the night, I try to give him a back massage for a while. It's about the only time we have where both of us can do something for ourselves.

- I let him know each and every day how much of a great father and partner he is and try to use examples from the day to reiterate my point and make it less generic and more sincere.

I don't know if those are plausible for your situation, but that's what we've been doing.
 
#15 ·
DD is 2 and a half weeks old now, give or take and really really easy well as long as someone is holding her. She is a snacker while breastfeeding which is weird since DS likes to nurse for hours straight if possible and she is quite happy to nurse for 5 to 10 minutes and be done for 30 to 45 minutes. I'm not sure if I prefer that or the nursing for 45+ minutes every 2 hours things that DS did. She is in the pouch a lot, but as long as she is against a warm body she is happy when her tummy has milk in it. She does seem to hate the car seat, but we're thinking it is because she is so little and the fact that she doesn't have someone holding her when she is in it. We'll have to wait and see how she likes it as she gets bigger, it is a bit weird to us that she doesn't like it since DS has always loved the car.

This week is my first week alone, though I am not really alone even there, today was the first day I had to deal with both DS and DD all day, yesterday my in-laws came over and they will be back tomorrow and Friday. It is nice that they are willing to come over since it lets DS have people focused entirely on him for awhile.

That being said, while DD is easy as long as she is being held, the almost 2 year old is a different story. He has decided that he needs to nurse all the time just like the baby, and is quite unhappy when Mommy says no. He also has not napped in the past two days. Today he nursed for almost an hour before deciding on no nap, which was just joy. I'm hoping that he gets a bit better as he gets more use to his sister. We do have our morning routine down though, which is nice, he comes into the bedroom when he wakes up and nurses and then I turn on Word World for him while nursing DD and once his show is over we head downstairs. Now we just need to work on the rest of the day past 9:30/10am.
 
#16 ·
It's so funny! About 2 hours after I started this thread, I was in labor. 2 hours after that, I had a new baby!

This will be my 3rd day PP and it is going by so fast! I am so glad she was born on Sunday because dh had just enough time to participate in her birth before he went to work. He hasn't even held her since then because he hasn't been here except to sleep short stretches
It has been difficult having all 5 alone with no help and my oldest has been sick when normally he could help out but we are faring well. So far still nameless baby (!) is very easy. Two nights she slept 6 hour stretches and last night I was able to sleep 5 hours straight waking to only stick my boob in her mouth! She hardly ever fusses but she does want to nurse a lot which is fine by me.

I definitely recommend ingesting some placenta, if you can. I feel amazing besides the excrutiating afterpains I have been having and already I am hardly bleeding. I think I could definitely fall prey to PPD or baby blues right now if it weren't for the placenta.

The kids are truly in love with her and falling all over themselves to hold her. The first 2 days my 2 yr old was quite a handful, all over her all the time and insisting baby sleep beside her for bedtime and naps but I think she is starting to adjust better now. I am trying to let her get her fill of baby when she wants it so it won't be a big deal to her after a while.

Thinking about all you still preggo mamas! It will be like flipping a switch when it is your turn, so quickly you are on the other side holding your sweet smelling newborn
 
#17 ·
eden and i are doing great, 5.5 weeks pp. the first few were really tough - we had a bad case of jaundice - her bili levels were up to 19 and i had to put her under the lights. coupled with crashing hormones, the reality of my situation (single mom-dom), and milk coming in late - so late that we had to supplement for the jaundice (thus sabotaging our bf relations from the very beginning), i lost it quite a few times. i think we started to hit our stride at around week 3.

the truth is, i couldn't have been blessed with a sweeter baby. we sleep well, and she fits perfectly into my lifestyle. if she fusses, we take her onto the deck and she's happy. loves riding in the car (mommy LOVES roadtrips). loves being outdoors. loves being worn. isn't a huge fan of bath time though...that might be due to my inexperience, so my mom has sort of made that her nana thing.

funny aside - i took her out 2 weeks ago in the sling and was walking around the reservoir and i saw another mom wearing her baby and got excited - don't see that too often around here. yeah, it was marilyn, known here on mdc as texanatheart, with her boys. she was checking me out for the same reason


admittedly, after reading some of the previous posts regarding partners, i'm kinda glad that the only relationship that i have to "figure out" right now is the one i have with my daughter. i still struggle with the abandonment, but i guess the universe has different plans for us. if we were meant to have a partnership through this, then we would. we don't. being a single mom is lonely but wonderful, and i'm starting to see endless possibilities opening up to me. the hardest part is letting go of my ego and letting him be her dad without the strings tethering him to me as well. the other part that i hate is dealing with his family. that's another thread though...


i healed up immediately - no tears (but i did have an epidural - not what i wanted but what i needed at the time - 14 hours of back labor and 3 hours of pushing!), i walked myself to my pp recovery room and had lost 27 of the 40 lbs i'd gained by the end of the 2nd week. just this week i am able to fit into 2 pairs of pp pants which excites me!! hormonally, i am officially not crazy anymore! totally back to my normal self, which excites me even more than fitting into my fav jeans.

i am so
:
:
over my baby. she's such a joy. she's smiling at me and really focusing on things. i laid her down on my bed facing an open window the other day and she just laid there staring at a tree for an hour and a half, cooing. i love being her mom...i needed her so much. i wake up in the morning and i'm always so glad to see her.

so i've learned a lot of lessons about letting go - i was devastated about our bf relationship, but came to terms with the fact that she's getting the best of both worlds. we nurse all night, and a few times during the day, but i just can't increase my supply enough to be her sole source. after awhile she fights me at the breast and screams. i can't let that happen - the time that we do spend nursing is really special and i don't want either of us to associate negative things with it. (i take fenugreek by the handful, have been to see a lc, tried pumping, latch her on constantly, but to no avail. and i'm ok with it). my birth didn't go at all how i wanted. there are so many things that i turned my nose up at while pregnant that i caved and obtained because they make sense for us. "whatever works" is what has been drilled into my head by my aunt and mom, and it's so true.

we're happy and thriving, and as far as i'm concerned, that's all that matters.
 
#18 ·
Jenny - That is so funny you ran into another mama from our DDC! I totally understand where you are coming from when having to make compromises. It was very much like that for me when I became a parent. Sometimes you feel or things happen differently than you expect.
 
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