Mothering Forum banner

1 - 4 of 4 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
512 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
How do all of you that SAHM manage your time? I feel lost and almost disoriented, and also feel down about the fact that dd is 1 year old already and I don't have any sort of system/routine for keeping things balanced. DD only naps for about 40minutes-1 hour a day<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/dizzy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Dizzy">: , and I feel like that amount of time isn't even time enough for me to breathe and drink a cup of tea, much less put a dent in the mental clutter. I have so many creative inclinations and organizational impulses, along with the constant list of "to dos" running through my head.<br>
Help. I truly want to ENJOY every minute of dd's childhood and feel so blessed to be at home with her, but feel so much of the time is spent thinking about what has to be done, what I'd really like to do if I had time, what I really should be doing...
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
439 Posts
I felt exactly the same way when my babies were small. I am a very spontaneous person and recoil at schedules. I reframed *schedule* into *rhythm*. I needed to create a loose structure for myself. I decided to choose what was most important for me to get done each day and go from there. For me it was meals, a shower, a clean kitchen and laundry. There were other things that needed to get done too, so I would give them a day.For example, cleaning the bathroom was Wed. I would not even let myself think about how messy the bathroom was unless it was Wed. This relieved so much mental stress for me. I knew what my priorities were, so everything flowed so much easier. At first I kept a list but after a while it flowed much more organically.<br>
I read somewhere that it only took 3 minutes to empty the dishwasher. That information was a lifeline, I knew I could carve out 3 minutes several times a day to keep my house from owning me.<br><br>
I found that getting out of the house each day was key to enjoying my babies. I guess we all needed a change of scenery as well as relief from the constant *shoulds*.<br><br>
I tried to do most of my homecaring with baby in the sling so that if I was able to lay him down for a nap I could nurture myself during that time. I almost always (still do) keep the tea kettle on low so that I can have a cup of tea whenever the moment presents itself.<br><br>
Sometimes when I got overwhelmed I would ask myself if I wished I were somewhere else, the answer was always- This is exactly where I want to be.<br>
Just that small shift in perspective could change my day.<br><br>
I am also a big fan of the gratitude journal. The act of writing down my blessings always brings me clarity.<br><br>
They do grow so fast...<br><br>
Many Blessings,
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
10,553 Posts
It gets better when they get older. I can't even get organized enough to remember to set my alarm clock or wash myself clothes. I have just resigned myself to floating in limbo-scatter-brained-land until my youngest is about 4 <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol">
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,403 Posts
<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Synthea™</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7893383"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">It gets better when they get older. I can't even get organized enough to remember to set my alarm clock or wash myself clothes. I have just resigned myself to floating in limbo-scatter-brained-land until my youngest is about 4 <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"></div>
</td>
</tr></table></div>
Yes, I think 4 is a "magic" age of sorts. Though 3 is looking mighty fine to me right now, compared to 2-1/2. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/dizzy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Dizzy">:<br><br>
This, too, shall pass...unless another baby comes along (but in my case we're definitively done, so I am finally feeling like I can really breathe again).<br><br>
My suggestion to the OP - start very, very small. Figure out which one undone task makes you most insane, and make it a point to do that one thing every day (or nearly every day - do the best you can). Once you get to where you are getting that one thing done routinely, add a second thing. When my first two were babies, for me it started with "get the diapers in the wash every morning." After weeks and weeks of trying and finally succeeding in making that routine, I added "sweep the kitchen floor." And that was it for a very long time. Those two things, and once they were done I didn't feel so crazy. Then after awhile I added "pick up the toys off the living room floor" (once a day was all I could manage). Then "vacuum the living room after the toys are picked up" - that came after the boys were a little older and weren't freaked out by the vacuum. When I was pregnant and had little-little-ones I had days where I couldn't do these things, but I tried. And as they got older it got easier.<br><br>
And now that they're 7 and 8, you know what my morning list starts with? "Put in a load of laundry. Pick all the toys up off the floor and put them away. Vacuum the kitchen and living room." I still have the same routine! And now I've added other things, like wash the dishes and put them away, LOL...but my kids help me with these things and it's not as much of an uphill battle anymore.<br><br>
This, too, shall pass.
 
1 - 4 of 4 Posts
Top