[MSUmama]

We live in a fairly small town, my kids have been attending the very local-like in our backyard-ps, the building is k-12 and with our kids age span, I really liked that...

Oldest dd is thriving, great grades, no issues, she's even a cheerleader, lol...

Middle dd, 13 and in 8th grade, is not. Grades have been iffy for the three years she's been there, social/emotional is not getting it for her....I'm actually concerned enough to have begun looking for a good therapy center for her, I also suspect she may have cut herself a few times, and have taken her to our doc to have her looked over, physically.

I am VERY, VERY worried. Part of her issue is her own drama, some is a teacher who doesn't know how not to gossip, and other parents have confirmed this for me, not just my two dd's. Problem with that is she's also the cheer coach so I have refrained from saying much...but I just spilled everything to the VP. Some of it is bullying, my kids are still new after three years, this is a "born and bred" area. Part of it is my husband left for Iraq last month, our 20 month old has a sensory disorder and my four year old has had some delays. Oldest dd is miss perfect and VERY hard on everyone, even me, holds everyone to her own high standards, which are the polar opposite of 13 yo dd. She's fun and carefree, by nature. She's depressed and angry right now.

She's been asking to change schools. There are only nine weeks left. I emailed the VP and asked if she could do a homebound program for the rest of the year. She didn't really answer me but asked what was going on, and apologized for not already knowing. I just finished a book of the issues dd has had and am waiting for a response. I did say that I would pull her and homeschool if I had to. I did that in Kansas with oldest dd when she was clearly not ready for 1st grade and they were insisting on promoting her.

My issues...I have no clue what my rights are. I am flying by the seat of my pants, this all just happened so fast. I should have listened sooner!!! I work full time, but my hours are flexible and I could even bring her to work with me. With my ft employment and hubby overseas, does that change anything as far as the state is concerned?

I was already floating around the idea of placing her in a private school for high school. Our four year old ds is doing great academically but his teacher and I both feel his is not ready for full day kindergarten, and that's our only option at their current school. I can't put her into that school this late in the year though, I don't even know if they'd take her.

Please advise, wise mamas. I am in a full on panic!
TIA

 

[gardenmommy]

How do you feel about just pulling her out right now, letting her de-stress the rest of the year, and picking back up with school (either at home or at a different school) in the fall? She can do lots of reading through the local library, projects that encompass history, grammar, research skills, writing skills, etc. by focusing on something in which she has a personal interest.

That may not work for you, or may not be an option, so I apologize if that is out of line with your thinking. I hope that you can find something that works for everyone in your family.

 

[Lillian J]

I'm not in Michigan, but to get you started asap, here's a webpage where you can read about the laws pertaining to homeschooling there - laws.

And here's a page that lists support group contact information all over the state, so you can start calling people who know what's what there - support groups.

Best of luck to you and your family - Lillian

 

[Lillian J]

Quote:

Originally Posted by gardenmommy How do you feel about just pulling her out right now, letting her de-stress the rest of the year, and picking back up with school (either at home or at a different school) in the fall? She can do lots of reading through the local library, projects that encompass history, grammar, research skills, writing skills, etc. by focusing on something in which she has a personal interest.

That's exactly what I was thinking - except that I think expecting the projects from her at this point is probably not realistic. It sounds as if she needs some serious decompression time at this point, and even smaller demands at a time like this can seem like a very big deal to a child in her shoes. But panic is not in order in any case - my bet is that you'll all get through this pretty soon and be relieved to have moved on.

Lillian

 

[MSUmama]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lillian J That's exactly what I was thinking - except that I think expecting the projects from her at this point is probably not realistic. It sounds as if she needs some serious decompression time at this point, and even smaller demands at a time like this can seem like a very big deal to a child in her shoes. But panic is not in order in any case - my bet is that you'll all get through this pretty soon and be relieved to have moved on. Lillian

This is exactly what I would love to do. My exact words to the VP were that she needs "a lot of nurturing and time to refocus" right now, and as far as I am concerned, through the next few months at least!

I actually think she might be able to do some projects, that is where she gets good grades at school. She needs a release and she's very artsy

I hadn't thought about letting her go to the library on her own and work. I am a bit over protective but I do believe the stressors at home, namely her siblings, are contributing to the whole picture here.

Thanks mamas!

 

[MSUmama]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lillian J I'm not in Michigan, but to get you started asap, here's a webpage where you can read about the laws pertaining to homeschooling there - laws. And here's a page that lists support group contact information all over the state, so you can start calling people who know what's what there - support groups. Best of luck to you and your family - Lillian

If I am reading correctly, I can do what I want as long as I cover all the subjects listed...so projects that incorporate several areas would work well under the circumstances.

I looked up the local support group here, there appears to be only one. This is from their about us page:

L.I.F.E. membership is open to families pursuing Christian home education.

As a cooperative support group, members assist with planning and conducting training and programs for students and families. We have activities year round, seminars, mentoring for new homeschool families, guest speakers from all over Michigan and neighboring states that have dedicated their lives to Homeschooling.

The annual membership fee includes a free monthly newsletter subscription, member discounts on activities, and a bi-monthly support group meeting.

The LIFE WEBSITE is a Closed Website meaning that you must have a current LIFE membership before you will be allowed to register and have access. If you would like more information please email,

That is a whole different can of worms, the kids and I are Christian, hubby is not and since he isn't here, I just made this decision without consulting him. Homeschooling her without his ok is going to be enough of a fight, taking it to Christian homeschooling without his ok just might get him on a plane back from Iraq, lol, and we don't want that right now, he's making lots of $$$. Not only that but I'm taking this as the 50th sign that I should quit my job, and I might, so he really needs to keep working...

So off to find other resources...thanks Lillian!!!

 

[Lillian J]

Quote:

Originally Posted by MSUmama That is a whole different can of worms, the kids and I are Christian, hubby is not...

Don't worry about it. Just call some other, secular, Michigan groups for information now, and deal with finding or starting a support group later.

Lillian

 

[shaywyn]

Michigan is one of the easiest states to home school in. You don't have to notify or report to anyone. The only glitch is pulling a child out mid year. I don't know exactly how that would work but I think just notifying the school or district is all you have to do. Once she is home, you won't have to do anything but live your lives.

 

[gardenmommy]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lillian J That's exactly what I was thinking - except that I think expecting the projects from her at this point is probably not realistic. It sounds as if she needs some serious decompression time at this point, and even smaller demands at a time like this can seem like a very big deal to a child in her shoes. But panic is not in order in any case - my bet is that you'll all get through this pretty soon and be relieved to have moved on. Lillian

If she were my daughter, I would not make her do anything, but I put out the idea, because some people have trouble with thinking about their child falling behind, or wondering what they will do, etc., if they just pull the child out with nothing planned.

To the OP: if your DD is artsy, why not let her just focus on that? It can be really helpful to just let over-stressed children not have any planned/structured activities, just to think about what *they* enjoy, how *they* like to learn, what is important to *them*. PS doesn't always encourage that sort of reflection, which, IMO, is a detriment to real learning.

If you are in a small town (which MI has a ton of), it might be feasible to leave a 13 y.o. in the library alone for a few hours while you run some errands or whatever. Maybe not all day, if the both of you aren't comfortable with that idea. Do you have any grandparent-type relationships that she could be comfortable staying with for the day (or week)? That could be very instrumental in helping her relax and refocus.

Edit: I am in MI, also, and it really is a very easy state in which to homeschool.

 

[MSUmama]

Unfortunately, we don't have any extended family close by, or any I'd be comfortable leaving her with. It is very much just the six of us.

We have been planning to redecorate her room this summer so I brought her a bunch of supplies home yesterday and told her her "school work" is going to be a plan for that. She loves design and wants to be a graphic artist so it's a great fit and it's personal and it serves a purpose, so she should do well with it. She's going to create a model of what she would like her room to look like, in her words "down to the polka dots on her bedding".

I am comfortable letting her hang out at the library, I just wouldn't have thought to let her do that since it's not something we've really talked about. We just typically do everything together. She does get to hang out at the mall on her own but it's tiny and my secretary works there as a second job so I know there is always someone she knows there for her.

Anyway, thanks for all the help mamas, I am withdrawing her from school tomorrow, I have a meeting I have to lead for the high schoolers. I don't know where we are going to go from here but at least she is safe and comfortable right now, and right now, that is all that matters to me.