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<p>I'm feeling a little frustrated with my midwife choices.  I know that in many respects I'm lucky because I have choices, but I just don't love any of the choices and I'm feeling frustrated because I moved three years ago and before I moved I did have a few choices that I really liked.  Anyway, I'm looking for any thoughts anyone might have on my choices.</p>
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<p>1) There is a CNM group.  They are 4 midwives.  I believe they have a traditional sort of rotation call schedule and you just get whoever is on call when you go into labor.  In addition to doing homebirths they have a birth center (where they do prenatal appointments too) and they do hospital births.  I plan on having a homebirth, but I guess it's nice that in the unlikely event of transfer they have privileges at the local hospital that I'd transfer to.</p>
<p>PROS:</p>
<p>* They have hospital privileges locally.</p>
<p>* I used them with my son's birth (there were only 2 midwives in the group then) and had a good experience</p>
<p>* Convenient for prenatal exams</p>
<p>* My insurance will cover my prenatal care with them</p>
<p>* They are licensed in my state - I think this matters to hubby and I'm not sure how I feel about it</p>
<p>* They are CNM's (versus CPM's) - I think this matters to hubby and I'm not sure how I feel about it</p>
<p>CONS:</p>
<p>* It is a group of FOUR and I can't see how I'd get to know them or how they'd get to know what I want from the birth</p>
<p>* No home visit - the first time they come to my home is for the birth - does it matter?  Somehow it just seems less personal</p>
<p>* My insurance will not cover their facility fee (my home is a "standalone surgical center" - I'd be laughing except that it's so ridiculously sad) - that'll be $1500 or $900 if paid by 28 weeks (which shouldn't be a problem)</p>
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<p>2) There is a brand-new CPM in the area.</p>
<p>PROS:</p>
<p>* I like her as a person</p>
<p>* She's a single midwife, so I'd really get to know her and she'd really get to know me</p>
<p>* Her prenatals would be convenient to my house</p>
<p>CONS:</p>
<p>* She's brand-new on her own (although she's caught hundreds of babies over the past 1-2 years in her training)</p>
<p>* I'd possibly be her second birth on her own / in her own practice</p>
<p>* Hubby probably would not go for it</p>
<p>* I don't think my insurance would pay anything (and I have no idea what the costs would be)<br>
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<p>3) There is a CPM who is slightly less local and gets good reviews</p>
<p>PROS:</p>
<p>* She's gotten good reviews from people I know</p>
<p>* She's a single midwife, so I'd really get to know her and she'd really get to know me</p>
<p>CONS:</p>
<p>* Prenatal appointments wouldn't be super convenient (possibly an hour or so away) and I have a 2.5yo son who'd be coming with me and I'd feel bad making him sit in the car so much</p>
<p>* Hubby might not go for it</p>
<p>* I don't think my insurance would pay anything (and I have no idea what the costs would be)</p>
<p> </p>
<p><br>
What else am I missing?  How do I decide?  Do I interview all three?  What questions do I ask?  Do I go with my gut?  My wallet?  Hubby's thoughts?  How do I find other midwives in the area (if there are others)?  I've already posted a question to my local tribe on MDC board looking for suggestions.</p>
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<p>To add the last bit of info, my daughter was born with a hospital group of 10-12 midwives.  That was not a good experience.  I definitely didn't feel like the midwives knew me or what I wanted.  I don't want a repeat of that.  But 10-12 midwives is far more than 4, but I'm still hesitant with 4.</p>
 

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<p>If you really want to have a birth your way, I say go with a CPM.  The CNM's defer to the OB and many of my friends have not had an ideal birth experience with CNMs.  My dh was against homebirth at first, but after gentle research bits that I fed him and our friends' experiences, he started to lighten up.  The kicker was taking him with me to interview mw's.  He definitely liked one and not the other, so that made our choice easier ( i liked them both).  Also, he got to pummel her with his questions, which were answered flawlessly and left no room for doubt.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Just mtc.</p>
 

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<p>interview all three of them and ask lots of questions and then decide. go with who you will feel the most comfortable with that is the biggest most important thing.</p>
 

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<p>I went with a group of 4 midwives last year with my son, surprisingly, I did feel like I got to know them all pretty well by the end and I would have been happy with any of them.  I'll be going with them again this time.  Also, in relation to your last choice, I had to and will have to again drive an hour and 20 minutes to get there.  I drag all of my children along every time.  They do just fine with it.  They get used to it.  I bring along snacks and maybe a few toys if I feel like it.</p>
 

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<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>mama_daba</strong> <a href="/community/forum/thread/1280582/midwife-choices#post_16059742"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a><br><br><p>interview all three of them and ask lots of questions and then decide. go with who you will feel the most comfortable with that is the biggest most important thing.</p>
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<br><br><p>That :)</p>
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<p>Can you ask to have your favorite MW come in? We have a center with 5 CNMs and while one of the others may look after you for a moment or two when you first get in, your 'main girl' is on her way. IME if your MW is in another birth? Traffic? there are a number of things, having a built in backup is nice.</p>
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<p>If I was you I would rule out the MW that is really far. With so many other choices closer, that drive (with a young son and pregnant belly) doesn't sound fun.</p>
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<p>I would have to think really hard about #2 the new MW. She's only new in that she's on her own now. She has seen plenty of babies into the world, just not alone.</p>
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<p>Sadly, it would boil down to money for my family. If the insurance didn't cover it, it wouldn't be an option. I feel really fortunate that I found a MW at all in my area :) I deliver in a hospital (MWs can lose their license for a HB in Ohio :() but it's on my terms!</p>
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<p>You'll find one you like! Just go talk to them all!</p>
 

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Discussion Starter #6
<p>You're right.  I need to interview all three.  I had sort of knocked the new midwife off the list, but I just got the (good?) news that she will be attending births with an experienced midwife for months or years to come.  So, now I am thinking that she might actually be the best choice.  I like her as a person (I've already met her).  I'm not as concerned about her being new as it relates to prenatal appointments because I feel like anything that comes up before birth has time to be sorted out.  She's nearby.  I'd get to know her and she'd get to know me.  But I have no idea how I'd sell hubby on the idea.</p>
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<p>So, you're right.  I need to actually meet my choices.  I will call and set up appointments this week or after Thanksgiving.  I've already got an appointment with the midwife group, but it's not until January.  I'll make the schlep out to the far away midwife (who I've already been warned doesn't come off warm and fuzzy but has gotten great reviews from a few people).  I'll meet with the new midwife.  Now I just need to make my list of questions.<br><br>
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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>kriket</strong> <a href="/community/forum/thread/1280582/midwife-choices#post_16061018"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border-bottom:0px solid;border-left:0px solid;border-top:0px solid;border-right:0px solid;"></a><br><br><br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>mama_daba</strong> <a href="/community/forum/thread/1280582/midwife-choices#post_16059742"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border-bottom:0px solid;border-left:0px solid;border-top:0px solid;border-right:0px solid;"></a><br><br><p>interview all three of them and ask lots of questions and then decide. go with who you will feel the most comfortable with that is the biggest most important thing.</p>
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<br><br><p>That :)</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Can you ask to have your favorite MW come in? We have a center with 5 CNMs and while one of the others may look after you for a moment or two when you first get in, your 'main girl' is on her way. IME if your MW is in another birth? Traffic? there are a number of things, having a built in backup is nice.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>If I was you I would rule out the MW that is really far. With so many other choices closer, that drive (with a young son and pregnant belly) doesn't sound fun.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>I would have to think really hard about #2 the new MW. She's only new in that she's on her own now. She has seen plenty of babies into the world, just not alone.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Sadly, it would boil down to money for my family. If the insurance didn't cover it, it wouldn't be an option. I feel really fortunate that I found a MW at all in my area :) I deliver in a hospital (MWs can lose their license for a HB in Ohio :() but it's on my terms!</p>
<p> </p>
<p>You'll find one you like! Just go talk to them all!</p>
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<p>Both money and not really having many options for midwives affected our last childbirth experience. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>We started out with midwives in GA and went to 2 appts with them.  They were really far away from our home (over an hour and a half).  Also, insurance didn't cover homebirths in GA, plus $2500 was a lot out of pocket.  We were in FL (before relocating there after the birth) for a few months and went to have routine tests done with midwives there.  But when we returned to GA, we decided on having a u/c.  We had our birthing kit and my husband had already helped delivery our first two in the hospital.  Everything went well.  I had to promise him that he could take me to the hospital if anything went wrong.  That was our Plan B.</p>
 
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