[Hippie Mama 79]

I interviewed a midwife two weeks ago, and I have my initial appointment tomorrow, where I'm going to pay her a deposit. I didn't feel an instant connection, but how important did you find that to be? I've worked with my OB/GYN with my previous pregnancies, and I didn't have the connection with her, but I trusted her and she was allowed me to birth my way.

I feel the midwife is competent, I guess I was hoping for the connection so many women talk about. Am I expecting too much? Will the connection come as we continue to work together?

Should I continue the search for another midwife?

 

[valerievalira]

I didn't feel a connection with my midwife first visit this pregnancy or my last.

But what I did feel both times was trust. I trusted them.

I don't think I have ever felt a connection the first time I have met anyone ever- friends, my husband... I am a slow to love you kind of person. So I don't consider the lack of a connection a problem.

That said: trust your gut. If your only problem is that you didn't feel something the internet says you should- meh. But if your gut just doesn't think you guys will jive... I'd pay attention to it.

 

[BirthFree]

I personally highly recommend interviewing 3 midwives if you have that many as options. Usually you will know for sure who you prefer.

Trusting and jiving with your midwife is important for sure IMO/experience. It's ok to take your time!

 

[chispita]

I personally highly recommend interviewing 3 midwives if you have that many as options. Usually you will know for sure who you prefer.

This. Never go with the first option which is just okay

 

[Hippie Mama 79]

Thank you for all the responses. I went with my gut, cancelled my midwife appointment yesterday and called another midwife. Just through the phone interview, I found my midwife. She is kind, gentle, and will assist me in the way I want to be assisted. I want a midwife to hands off, and allow me to be me during pregnancy and birth.I felt at complete ease, our phone call was long, and we seemed to jive well. I'm so excited!! I will be meeting with her soon. My GD doesn't bother her in the least since my biggest baby was 7 pounds 3 ounces.

Thank you for all the support and giving me the idea to trust my gut. I didn't want to spend the next six months trying to get to know someone just to feel comfortable, if that makes sense. Ha!