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<p>I had a little freak out over the weekend (in my head).<span><img alt="nut.gif" src="http://files.mothering.com/images/smilies/nut.gif" style="width:15px;height:15px;"></span>  Our first is 22 months old and I am suddenly sad/concerned that he won't take well to the new one.  This thought has been on the fringes of my mind but now that we are down to the wire I just had a moment of panic i.e. My baby (DS) is going to feel left out. What if I can't give him enough attention because of the new one's demands.  I'm going to miss it just being the two of us. etc. </p>
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<p>Also, DH and I both work and I don't see that changing anytime soon.  I can't help but think suddenly "OMG how are we going to juggle two AND work!"  I know people do it ALL the time and I have been fine with the idea but thinking about it just made me tired.  Maybe because I've been so tired lately anyway.</p>
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<p>To top it off I'm a VBAC and I have been really comfortable with the idea after researching my hiney off and speaking with women who have had successful VBAC's but again I had a mini freak out thinking about uterine rupture and/or ending up with a repeat c-section. </p>
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<p>These things have not really bothered me up until this point.  I think I'm just hormonal and nervous about the transition from 1 child to 2 (both of them under 2 yrs old).  I know that we will all adapt and this is really just a venting post but I just wanted to get it out. </p>
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<p>Vent away!  It's better to acknowledge fear and apprehension, work through it, and then let it go, instead of pretending it doesn't exist.  My DD is three, and I also feel the sadness that she is about to no longer be the only baby, and worry that she might not take to the new one very well.  Things will work out.  DH and I both work outside the home as well, but we have a very loving household.  I know that DD will adapt and thrive. </p>
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<p>As for your VBAC, you can do it!  Your risk of rupture is only slightly higher than mine, with no history of c/s.  Your body is strong, resilient, and will birth your baby beautifully.  I am sure that you have prepared yourself with all the information you will need to make the best choices during your baby's birth.  I am sure you have surrounded yourself with people you trust, who will help you if anything does go differently from the plan.  Each birth has so much to teach us.  Good luck, you will do great!</p>
 

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<p>I totally understand all your fears and worries, and I know that you'll all be just fine.  Sometimes it helps just to do a brain dump and get it out there ... hope that you're feeling better!</p>
 

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<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>Simonsez2u</strong> <a href="/community/forum/thread/1288965/mini-panic#post_16156698"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a><br><br><p> </p>
<p>To top it off I'm a VBAC and I have been really comfortable with the idea after researching my hiney off and speaking with women who have had successful VBAC's but again I had a mini freak out thinking about uterine rupture and/or ending up with a repeat c-section. </p>
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<p>I can reply to this part because I am a VBAC. I figure IF I need a repeat c-section, I will know why, and I won't be bullied into doing it because someone says so but because it is needed. It may happen, it may not, but you have the knowledge now to know why it needs to be done. I am not worried at all about a UR.</p>
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<p>Now I have been having contractions since about 1AM, and they are not like I expected, so my worry is that my natural child birth might end up with an epidural, but you know, that is my choice I CAN make, not a choice someone is making for me. I hope that helps - I also say worry doesn't change the outcome. You can write your worries on a piece of paper with a plan on how to deal with them, and other than that, you just have to trust it works out the best way possible. I think of that serenity prayer lately <span style="font-size:12px;">"<span style="font-family:Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif;">God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference. " Sounds goofy and over the top, but it's true, there is only so much I can do, aside from that, I have to trust the people around me.</span></span></p>
 

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<p>You'll do fine I'm sure on both fronts! I worked full time when I went from 1 to 2, it's hard to juggle, but it can be done. Some days I feel like working was easier than staying home like I do now. My 2nd was a VBAC attempt, I really wouldn't worry to much about UR.  I think everyone freaks out a bit towards the end. I know I'm feeling quite overwhelmed today. Good Luck!!</p>
 

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<p>ack! if it makes you feel better, I'm in the same boat ('cept my older one is 15mos). Vbac, wohm, 37wks-- and haven't packed my bag yet. It's a stressful time. I keep telling myself -- we'll get through. Mothers are the best at sacrificing/improvising/finding a way through somehow.  My husband/family is very helpful, and that gives me some solace.</p>
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<p>Do you get a mat leave?</p>
 

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<p>Thanks for the support and encouragement ladies!<span><img alt="smile.gif" src="http://files.mothering.com/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="width:16px;height:16px;"></span>  I've talked myself down.  I know that things will work out I just had a moment. <br><br>
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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>texmati</strong> <a href="/community/forum/thread/1288965/mini-panic#post_16157262"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border-right:0px solid;border-top:0px solid;border-left:0px solid;border-bottom:0px solid;"></a><br><p> </p>
<p>Do you get a mat leave?</p>
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Yes, I do and thank goodness and my boss generously offered to pay me the same salary while I'm gone.  Only thing is I think he would rather me come back sooner than later.  I told him that I would take two months for sure and then see what happens.  I may take the full 12 weeks even if some of it is not paid.  That alone took a huge weight off of my shoulders (we had money saved but it was going to be tight and definitely not a long leave). <br>
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<p>This is great news!  12 weeks isn't really long, IMO, but better than 6, or none.  I get 6 standard with the military, and then I have a lot of regular leave built up that I can use also.  I will probably be returning one day a week at around 6 weeks, and I will continue that for another 6 or 8 weeks.  We reeeeeally need a better maternity leave system in this country!</p>
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<p>good news on the mat leave. One upside to working is that ds has gotten used to different people caring for him-- I know he can spend a few hours with grandma/grandpa and be fine. Another benefit to having them so close together is (as my dad so eloquently pointed out) that my son is so cute, fun and interactive at this age, and the new baby will be boring and funny looking. So at least I can count on grandpa to keep him entertained!</p>
 

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<p>I've been having the same kind of freak outs here too!  I'm 37 weeks and also trying, hoping and praying for a successful VBAC.  DD is 27 months so I have the same worries about jealousy and her not adjusting.....although she is a very loving cuddly child so sometimes my fear swings the other way that she will try to hold/pick up/snuggle the baby when DH or I aren't looking.  So I also worry that I won't be able to take my eyes off of them for a second or she might try to pick him up, and being on 2 she isn't always very gentle with things! </p>
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<p>I'm a WAHM that does PT transcription work and I am also co-owner/VP of a small, startup telecom company.  I have a really hard time getting work done at home with one child, I worry all.the.time how I am going to get anything done with a toddler and a newborn.  Luckily I have been able to let the transcription work go the last few weeks and probably won't do that anymore.  But I can't let my own business go to the wayside, that's not fair to my partner either.  I think by the spring I may need to have a mother's helper come in one or two days a week to help out so that I can get back to work and keep our business going. </p>
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<p>The one thing that gets me through my panics is just telling myself that I am not the only woman in the world to have two kids.  Millions of other women have done, and have done it with more than two, and they found a way to make it work.  My own mom had two kids and we turned out just fine so that helps ease my mind a little knowing that we will adjust in our own way.  <span><img alt="thumb.gif" src="http://files.mothering.com/images/smilies/thumb.gif" style="width:23px;height:18px;"></span></p>
 
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