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mixing birthing "methods"

530 Views 12 Replies 12 Participants Last post by  smeisnotapirate
Are you generally sticking to one birthing "method" or philosophy, or kinda patchworking some together?
I started reading the hypnobirthing book, then I started reading the Birthing from Within book.. I like them both but now I feel more confused because it's a bit conflicting.. hypnobirthing being more about, well, obviously hypnosis and total relaxiation/breathing techniques, while Birthing from Within is talking about labor being active work. I kinda feel like I personally believe it's more the middle ground, but it's awfully hard picking and choosing bits from different philosophies and piecing it together into a sound method for my self.
make sense? I thought writing would help, then I found myself writing a list of questions for the midwife, list of things I want her to assist with, list of things I want dh to do/remind me of, list of things to do before labor, list for during, list for the actual birth, etc.. and now it all feels so overwhelming that I just want to forget about it all together and do baby laundry (hence my recent post on that topic). Like should I be active during early labor by doing a "labor project" and squatting, stretching, getting things done, or should I lay down and totally seclude myself into a more alternate state of mind. I suppose I can't be planning everything- whatever comes natural is what I will do, but I feel like I've read too many options and may be running around like a chicken with its head cut off, so to say.
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I totally think you can mix and match methods.

I honestly haven't even looked at any single method. The class we're taking is an overview, and has aspects of various techniques, but at no time has the instructor said "this is bradley" or "this is hypnobabies" or "this is lamaze" or whatever. She's just said, "and this might help some women and this might help some women." She has handouts of all sorts of things that might work for us, depending on how our labor goes and our personality and all of that. I can already see some things that I think will help, and some that I don't. But she's also prepared us that what we THINK may not be what we actually want at the time.
Well, I'm taking Bradley classes, so that's been the main focus for me. But I'm also listening to Hypnobabies, and I don't think they contradict each other since the motto of Bradley is that "relaxation is the key to labor."
In my experience, I think being open is very important. I never held onto one method, and I'm really glad because it took a whole bunch of different things to get me through my births. I think, for me, if I had gone in with only plan, and that plan didn't work, I'd have lost it.

Warning: vI think labor is very personal though and a lot depends on you. So this is just my experience and my perspective.

Okay: I never found that I could just "relax" through my contractions (perhaps because they came on very fast and hard?). It was too much for to concentrate on my breathing (even with dh coaching me...in fact, he almost got smacked a few times). It went best with my third birth because I had read Birthing From Within, and I just gave into the pain. I surrendered myself to it, and in that surrender I was able to give birth. And yeah I moaned, groaned and grunted plus swore quite a bit, and even whined a few times that it hurt too much and that I couldn't do it;P

That said, I am not slamming any one method. I know that for some people having one method they love is the best approach but I think if you're already thinking of patching then patch!
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oliver'smama, i had the same specific issues w/ birthing from within and hypnobabies. i had wanted to do hypnobabies, but there wasn't a class near me and meanwhile my husband and i read through birthing from within.

though i don't really see an inherent conflict b/n the two, my MWs seemed to think that hypnobabies is a little too much towards the relaxation end, and are more on the extreme of the work and surrender end. i guess after i'd thought about it more, i kind of put the hypnosis idea behind me, feeling like i would be more myself with the surrender/work approach. just working through birthing from within was empowering, wonderful experience for me and my husband.

though i'm fascinated with any kind of hypnosis in labor and birth, watching the videos ultimately made me feel that FOR ME, i'd be taking myself out of a situation i want to experience fully. and i'm not afraid of pain, so i think it's the best...

however, i'm also learning birthing-specific yoga moves, and doing a lot of meditation and breathing that's not birthing from w/in specific.
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One thing I loved about Hypnobabies was how inclusive it was. We did Bradley when I was pregnant with DS, and while I felt like I knew a LOT about the stages of labor I was in and how to avoid intervention (fat lotta good THAT did me
), I felt like I was given almost NO tools to back up their "relaxation" part of the program. I totally wigged out when I was in labor.

For me, the Hypnobabies is helping me keep my Zen. I also just read "Birthing from Within" and think it jives exactly with Hypnobabies. In the Hypnobabies program, you get your "center" switch early on for when you want/feel/need to be active during labor, so you can keep up the intense relaxation but be able to talk, move around, or do whatever it is you need to do.

I know Hypnobabies technically says to NOT use any other programs (because they want to make sure you're not getting negative messages about birth and labor), but I think it flows beautifully with all the other NCB techniques I've studied.

So I guess my answer is that hopefully this will be a Hypnobirth, but in the course of becoming informed about childbirth, you can't help but "blend" methods, I think. I think just doing Hypnobabies is just as ignorant and one-sided as just attending a birth class offered by your local hospital and calling that "childbirth prep."
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I'm not birthing by any method. With my first, focusing on an object helped immensly.

With my 2nd, that didn't do the trick.

This time I'll make sure I have some focus items available, some soothing music on my iPod so I can wear the earbuds to zone out, if necessary and some candles/flowers to make the room feel peaceful. I'll probably keep an "opening" mantra in mind as well.
I've read the Bradley books and Birthing from Within. Here is my take, having done 4 births:

You never know what you're going to get, and it makes sense to have a variety of tools at your disposal to handle things. Birth may be harder than you expect. It may be easier than you expect. You use what is useful in the moment, and don't worry about whether that means you're the most zened out hypnobirther ever, have an orgasmic birth, are trying to climb walls and yelling or anything in between. But no matter how things work out, you will work through it and be fine. Birth happens.
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I read a lot of books, and never really got into the mindset of "I'm going to use this method specifically".
I just hoarded as much knowledge and advice as I could, and then did whatever came naturally to me when I was in labor.

If you're planning on using a method, I'd say to make as many back-up method plans as possible. As PPs have said, every birth is different, and he method that appeals to you most might not wind up being the one that helps you most in the end.
loveneverfails, thank you! your reponse was beautiful. and encouraging. and i am saving it and reading it over and over.
I do feel that I "blend methods". I think the BFW and hypno do work well together. There is some contraindiction in that BFW admits there is "pain" in birth and hypno says birth should have little to no pain or should just be interpreted as waves/pressure.

I take all of it and mash it together. And not on purpose, just naturally in birth. This works for me but might not be right with all women.

What I feel when I am in labor is excitement and appreciation. And I think about the beauty of my process and my baby. I incorporate the spiritual and knowing from BFW with the trust and relaxation from hypno. I don't need to move a ton in labor but do move some. I don't feel a great deal of pain - I would call it more "intensity" vs. pain. It is not hard work that forces me to moan and grunt. I'm fairly quiet.

But that is me. I've seen clients with such ranges of concentration and vocalization and all have beautiful experiences. You will mesh them into your own creation of labor!

BTW - I personally find it useful to ignore labor as long as it feels appropriate to do so. (Like BFW - find a labor project). Or just do normal daily stuff until you can't anymore. Some labors do last for days! (usually not intense for that time period, just from start to end). And I couldn't imagine getting in a hypno groove and staying there for days. I think your body gives you a sign when you need to concentrate whether you are using hypno or some other technique - you will FEEL the need to slow down, to have people shut up, to dim lights etc. A sign may be nervousness, anxiety, some feelings "like" pain or intensity. This is the time to let others know you need to zone out! I say let it happen in its own time but it can be like a marathon so don't whip out every technique you've ever heard of in the first few hours! Pace yourself.
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Originally Posted by GreenTeaGinger61 View Post
Okay: I never found that I could just "relax" through my contractions (perhaps because they came on very fast and hard?). It was too much for to concentrate on my breathing (even with dh coaching me...in fact, he almost got smacked a few times).
I had what my midwife calls a "freight train labor" and relaxing was really not happening. However, I still loved Bradley. I tell people that the relaxing doesn't actually help the pain, but trying so hard to relax just distracts you from it.


I really liked Bradley, but will look into something else next time and use in in conjunction - just whatever feels right.

I think the very best thing about Bradley is it results in informed and empowered husbands.
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Originally Posted by DoulaAlicia View Post
I personally find it useful to ignore labor as long as it feels appropriate to do so. (Like BFW - find a labor project). Or just do normal daily stuff until you can't anymore. Some labors do last for days! (usually not intense for that time period, just from start to end). And I couldn't imagine getting in a hypno groove and staying there for days. I think your body gives you a sign when you need to concentrate whether you are using hypno or some other technique - you will FEEL the need to slow down, to have people shut up, to dim lights etc. A sign may be nervousness, anxiety, some feelings "like" pain or intensity. This is the time to let others know you need to zone out! I say let it happen in its own time but it can be like a marathon so don't whip out every technique you've ever heard of in the first few hours! Pace yourself.

That was my first labor! My MW (who is amazing) said "ok, how are we going to prevent that next time?" I came up with a list. When I realize I'm in labor, I will:

1. Take out a chicken/turkey to brine for after labor meal.
2. Take a nap.
3. Take a shower.
4. Clean up the kitchen.
5. Prepare turkey/chicken for roasting and put in the oven. (may be DH's job)
6. Set up the birth pool.
7. Make a lovely postpartum nest (I'm banished from the 2nd floor, so I'll be camping out in the living room).
8. Pull out the birth kit.

I'm adding to the list all the time. I'm keeping myself busy, because I was miserable and exhausted with my 53 hour labor not even 12 hours in. It completely was the reason for my hospital transfer and the FTP to c-section.
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