I am a first time mother, with a wonderful 9 month old. Before I became pregnant I struggled with anxiety, but after pregnancy I have been dealing with extreme ppd and suicidal thoughts. I have my husband, but I feel like I am so alone in this journey. I had a moment a few weeks ago when I was completely suicidal and I was so ready to leave this Earth. I was seeing a variety of therapists, but they did not try to understand my situation. I made the decision to start reaching out to people (which until now I have been totally against). I have come to the conclusion that this is the only way to stay sane. Community is everything. I even started a blog yesterday in order to tell my story, and then what luck finding this site today! I'm sorry that this is so long, but I'm holding on to my sanity by writing! Please reach out if you can relate to my story. I need to feel like I'm not the only one.