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How "absolutely invaluable" is it to join one of these clubs?<br><br>
Is it like joining LLLI if you are breastfeeding? Because I never joined LLL and have nursed two babies with no problems. I typically don't join clubs or organizations because I don't have a lot of spare time, but if there is a really great reason to join then I will.<br><br>
If you did, how "crunchy" are they tpically? Would the mainstream-ness drive me batty?
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>MamaChicken</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/11545507"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">If you did, how "crunchy" are they tpically? Would the mainstream-ness drive me batty?</div>
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Not at all. And yes. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/orngbiggrin.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="orange big grin">
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>purpleheather79</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/11545964"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Not at all. And yes. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/orngbiggrin.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="orange big grin"></div>
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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/yeahthat.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="yeah that">:<br><br>
I was in a MOMs club when I was pregnant with mine, and when they were first born, back when I wasn't crunchy (although I still knew enough not to circ or vax). It was nice, but there's no way I could stomach it now. When we moved to SoCal, the MOMs club there was basically a reference for nannies. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/eyesroll.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="roll">
 

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It depends on your support network without the local club and on the folks who go to the club near you. The clubs are very different in different places. I didn't have a local support network, so I needed the club. And, I met some pretty crunchy twin mamas through the group. There is one mainstream mom who joined recently who drives me batty but I just don't engage with her.<br><br>
A lot of people join the clubs near me to get the discounts that the club has negotiated with local merchants and to shop early at the biannual used clothing sales, but never go to meetings.<br><br>
So, they are definitely not necessary, but can have their uses.
 

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All the groups out here are REALLY mainstream, so I started my own. I worked at a small natural parenting store, and we advertised a twin mother's group. I maintain the mailing list, and we have about 20 moms that get notification of meetings. Maybe 5-6 come each month, but our meeting are during the day and more than half the moms have returned to work at this point.
 

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I personally love my Mulitples Club. Yeah, it's mainstream, but I'm so over getting upset about what other people do to raise their children. Members know that I have AP/natural family type leanings and can come to me with any questions.<br><br>
We have 300 members, over 100 people attend meetings and the bi-annual sale is a fantastic way to get rid of the stuff that seems to come along with twins.<br><br>
I take what I need from the club and leave the rest.
 

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I'm a member of my small local club (15 families, maybe?), which lies somewhere between crunchy and mainstream. They recently split off of the larger club in town which is decidedly mainstream (no kids allowed mtgs, "Babywise" lending library, etc). Most of the MoMs in our group fully or partially bf, several BW, and one of the moms owns/runs the CD service in town and is also an LC. It was a blessing in the beginning to have them as a resource for clothes/sales/discounts and NICU advice since my boys were a bit early. They also each brought over a lovely meal after we brought my boys home. I don't do much with them now, besides volunteer to bring meals to new MoMs and the Ronald McDonald house, but it's not for their lack of activities for kids and families.<br>
From what I've heard, this type of MoMs club is NOT the norm, though. You might consider putting out some feelers re: your local club, depending on the support you could use after your babes' birth, but don't be surprised if it's a disappointment.
 

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MamaChicken, I'm a member here in Portland. I joined just before the annual sale, and while they did contact me by email, they informed me that someone would be calling me to help me get hooked up with the group, and so far, no one has. The sale was pretty huge, but the prices seemed pretty high - seemed better for the vendors than the customers, imo. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/winky.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Wink"><br><br>
I had hoped for a little more in the way of orientation to the group, since I'm not really a jump-right-in kind of person. Here's the link to the PDX group: <a href="http://www.fullhousemoms.com/" target="_blank">Full House</a><br><br>
Membership was only $20, I think, so I felt like I didn't have much to lose by joining. HTH
 

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The one I've gone to near Seattle had several crunchy mamas along with a LOT of mainstream moms. I didnt talk much-the friend I was there with isnt very crunchy either-but it was nice to see a few who coslept, babywore, etc.
 

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I'm a member of the multiples group in Portland, OR, and so far have received some preemie clothes from them, and the use of a crib (will probably collect dust, but thought it might come in handy at some point) and a meal was brought to our family. It's a BIG group and I guess you feel as connected as the effort you put into it. I did buy a stroller off their posting board, and so far have met 2 moms on my side of the river. The events seem to be on the other side and I don't really ever go that way. I tend to associate it with "mainstream-ness". I wanted to go to an expectant parents brunch before delivering, but I was a little concerned that people would freak out when I told them I wanted to homebirth the twins. But who knows.... maybe they would have been cool with it, or even doing the same thing.<br>
As far as the group goes, it's all just other people with multiples trying to make some group function cohesively, so there is a big time delay in getting back to you or maybe an "event" will only have a couple people, as I'm sure organizing things are hard.<br>
The group I did and still do love, is LLL. I never needed BF help from them, but I got a lot of support and good connections there. They also had a splinter group that BF toddlers and older kids, and became a great parenting resource, as really, once BF is established, there aren't too many things to talk about, so the group is about a lot more than just the logistics. I think if you have time, you should try the group now before delivery and see what they have to offer, and what you can offer them. With such a large base of people, I'm sure that there are crunchy parents out there in my group, and will just take some effort on my part to find them! Good luck <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile">
 

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How necessary? IME so far (27 months post having twins) it's been absolutely UNnecessary. I've been to exactly 1 event (which was okay although I had nothing in common w/any of the moms) and find that all the discussion amongst members (on their email list) is discouraging to breastfeeders (ie "Just don't think you HAVE to breastfeed. I gave formula and my twins are just fine."), doesn't support the family bed, or basically any other AP standards. Plus the monthly meetings are all at night (when I'm in bed helping my twins nurse to sleep AND stay asleep) and they don't allow children (not even infants). I hear that there are some decent groups out there but sadly mine isn't one of them.
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>DoomaYula</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/11546056"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">When we moved to SoCal, the MOMs club there was basically a reference for nannies. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/eyesroll.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="roll"></div>
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Oh yeah, that's the other main thing discussed on my MOMs club email list.
 

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i've been a member of two. the first one, where i use to live was wonderful. i just quit the one here where we move to about a year ago b/c i just couldn't take it anymore.<br><br>
it's worth checking out IMHO, but if you don't click with them, just be prepared to walk away.
 

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No way. I have nothing in common with the MoMs groups here, besides the fact that we have twins. I feel much more at home with my natural parenting group, even though I am the only one with twins.
 

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Survey says... XXXXXXX<br><br>
Count me among the ones who just don't have the energy for it.
 

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I'm in the San Francisco one. I've been since the girls were born. I thought with it being San Francisco and all there might be a few crunchier parents, but if they are, they certainly keep their mouths shut on the email list serve. Like PP said, it's a huge reference for nannies, which I don't use. And I don't really get myself too upset over what other parents do, but there have been several posts about sleep training 8 week old infants that upset me. I do speak up about breastfeeding and share what I helped me be successful with exclusive nursing in hopes that maybe it will help expectant and new mamas.<br><br>
I've found it helpful here and there for recommending local multiples friendly parks, restaurants, etc, but I was just thinking earlier today that I won't renew my membership. I don't get anything out of it anymore.
 

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I have never been to one but I have no doubt I would not fit in. They are kids free here too and at night so I have never been able to go since I can not leave my twins at night. I guess it really depends on the group, I am sure some are better than others, and on your parenting style.
 

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I wouldn't write it off because of preconceived fears or notions.<br><br>
Yes, it's likely to be full of mainstream folks. If you can't stand to have anyone different from you, parenting wise, around you then you probably will not be able to handle it. Though you may feel the same about AP oriented groups when you have your multiples because you'll be likely to run in to a hell of a lot of ignorance and unintentional hurtfulness there too.<br><br>
I think it's foolish not to poke around and see what your local group offers. It may not be for you, and that's cool, but you never know, you might find some things useful.<br><br>
My local club is freakin' huge. And most of the people I'd say are mainstream. On the other hand, it's nice to have a group of people that are going to ferociously have your back when it comes to dealing with stupid twin comments by parents of singletons...it's nice to hook up for handmedowns with other twins (for those outfits you don't want to separate). I dislike large gatherings of people, mostly because I'm an introvert. But I've received quite a bit of internet support over the years, and the "first year" subgroup was very nice when I was pregnant. I also enjoyed a mom and babies twins "playgroup" because I could laugh and cry with folks who truly understood what it was like and who weren't going to fawn all over me and paw me because OMG I would just DIE if I were you, how do you do it with TWO?!?! (Yes, sometimes the special attention is nice. However, it quickly devolved into vomitrociousness for me, I prefered to be with a group that wasn't going to make a big deal out of things, and where having two babies could be normal for once and not fuel for other people's fantasies or nightmares.)<br><br>
It was also an invaluable source of information and support when my boys were diagnosed with TTTS. I don't have family close buy, so when MIL left after 8 weeks, I had a phone/email buddy I could freak out to, who had BTDT.<br><br>
And our club has a huge sale, where for quite a while I just swapped out clothing and toys and didn't pay a dime for any clothing or toys for my kids because I'd break even selling/buying.<br><br>
So it really depends on the club. If I was a small thing where I'd have to go to meetings to meet anyone, I never would have joined. Give me a website where I can get to know people, sure why the hell not. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> But that's my personality. I don't get offended if people parent differently than I do, and for the most part I don't take it personally if someone gets offended by my parenting style (becaue really that's their problem/hangup and not mine). I get really bored being surrounded by people with identical beliefs and values to my own, so I naturally gravitate towards more challenging situations. You know your needs/likes best. So I'd encourage you to get more information about the specific group you might join, and make a decision from there...because no multiples club is going to be universal in group attitude, makeup, ect.
 

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My MoMs group has been something of a cross-cultural experience. It's dominated by North Shore moms, and I live in the city.<br><br>
The last meeting I went to was at a $1.2 mil home in Winnetka. The program was on sleep training, but I smiled big when the guest speaker talked about NOT allowing a child a 'scream it out' and that breastfeeding pretty much precludes any type of sleep training. The few crunchy moms in the group made themselves known and it was easy to connect.<br><br>
That said, we seriously scored at the resale. I think we came home with about $1000 worth of stuff that we paid maybe $200 for.<br><br>
Take what you like and leave the rest. It can have its advantages.
 

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I joined mine, and have barely attended any meetings other than the twice-yearly used-stuff sales. I found that I didn't really "click" with most of the members, and since it takes superhuman effort and arrangements for me to go out alone at night, it's just not worth it for me. I'm not supercrunchy, but the group as a whole is way more mainstream than I am.
 
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