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My 2-1/2 y.o. is out of control.

551 Views 7 Replies 7 Participants Last post by  LuckyMommaToo
I'm starting to really doubt myself. He's a very active, articulate kid, and I'm eight months pregnant. If I'm not paying attention to him literally EVERY moment, he freaks out and does things that are explicitly not allowed, like beating up the dog or throwing his wooden food all over the house. I'm so frustrated. We've never done TO, and frankly, I don't think it would work for him anyway. Is this normal behavior for this age? I'm afraid he's turning into the kind of demanding kid I wouldn't like if he weren't mine. To top it off, he no longer naps, ever, so my days with him are really long. And yes, we do get out of the house often.

ETA: It's like I feel like a prisoner to him. I can't talk on the phone, answer an email or empty the dishwasher because he makes it so miserable. There must be another way, right??

Any tips? Advice? Books? BTDT?

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I've btdt, my son was that age when I was preggers. That's a tough age, plus if you have an active can be really hard. I think they also sense that things are about to change in a huge way. Hang in there, and take care and enjoy this last bit of time before the new baby!
My DS is 23 months, & I'm thinking about getting preg, & I'm worried about going through what you're going through - no advice, just
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You are Your Child's First Teacher, by Rahima Baldwin Dancy

One of the best!!! This book will help you, and it talks about birth and babies, too!

If I had a million dollars I'd give this book to EVERYONE
I need to read that book. We are in a similar spot- except my daughter is a few months older (June bday) and I am due in May. First, always pick up and remove anything he throws. My daughter started throwing things again this week, I thought we were through it. I read about one mom here who put stuff they threw into a tupperware on the table, and they couldn't have it back until the next day. I just put stuff up high. Then I deal with the tantrum, and we talk about it afterwards. He will stop throwing faster if you take stuff away he throws EVERY time no exception. I am also trying to be proactive with dd and HALTT- she will act up if hungry, angry, lonely or tired. The second T is for teething, because she's still getting molars. For us sometimes I give preventative homeopathics for teething (chamomile and pulsatilla) and have snacks out constantly. For some kids, filling up their cup with direct attention in the morning helps them the rest of the day (and they're tired of mommy). Mine goes back and forth with the nap thing. I think she's better off with one right now, so I started getting up at 630 and it's worked so far. I give her Rescue Remedy all the time. And I think most american kids need magnesium supplementation to calm them down (we haven't gotten there yet). Probiotics can actually help calm kids down too- apparently the lack thereof can exacerbate anger issues from what I've read. The phone I have not mastered. I just let dd talk to whoever is on the phone for a minute, then she's over it. I do get calls from clients, and had to shut her out of the room to take a call she was screaming so much. I hated doing it, but it was my most important (and calling from Korea) client. if I lose him it would be poverty for us! Another phone strategy is to have a special tempting toy or 2 he ONLY gets during phone calls, comp time or both. I haven't tried this because I'm short on dollars. I think it would work though.
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I remember that phase well. We seem to be on the other side of it now somewhat, but that's because, and remember this, you can actually start to reason with them some when they get a little bit older. The no longer napping thing can be brutal esp. when your pg and they are cranky. There was a period of time when the only time I could make a phone call or answer email was while he watched a cartoon
: Don't you wish we all lived in communes so we didn't have to go through these battles alone?

The thing is, you are not alone. Get a small basket of toys and keep them on top of your fridge for when you are on the phone. Enlist him to help you with the dishwasher (they usually LOVE sorting silverware). And remember this too shall pass!
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Thanks for the support. My library has that book, so I will definitely check it out. The idea of special toys for the phone is great -- I will try it! And luckily today is going much, much better. I think he was off-kilter yesterday; it's like he gets in this mania that just feeds on itself, and I can't figure out how to get him calmed down. I should have tried putting him in his swing in retrospect. Anyway, it's so nice to hear I'm not alone.
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