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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
... and it makes me not like her very much sometimes.
:


I keep telling myself she is just a baby, and I'm sure its something she needs, and I just don't know what it is... etc..... but I am burned out on how constantly cranky she is. I guess its not LITERALLY constant... our mornings go okay. But once afternoon / evening / night is here... thats it. She doesn't want to nurse, she doesn't want to be held, she doesn't want to play on the floor (practicing crawling), she doesn't want to play in her jumping toy, she doesn't want to take a nap.......

But it seems that if I talk to her.. CONSTANTLY.... it will distract her from being cranky. If I stop for a second.... more whining / crying. But if I look at her and act excited.... its like a switch, and shes all smiles -- for a few seconds!!

Is it just attention that she wants / needs? Its fine, but I can't maintain a constant stream of talking / noise / excitement for her........ I don't know what else to do!!

Oh, and she doesn't like the sling, either, unless I am CONSTANTLY (noticing a pattern here?) moving. If I hesitate / stop... shes trying to throw herself out of the thing.

And she's crying right now in her swing and I have to go get her and I just don't even want to. Because I don't know what I'll do with her once I pick her up.


Well, here I go.
 

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sounds like my 4 1/2 mo. old. sometimes, very rarely, she will tolerate baby einstein from in my arms. and you know what? i am fine with that 'cause at least i don't have to be ON to do that. i might even get to read a page of something.

can you hand her off to someone sometimes? sometimes, i just hand mia off to dh for a while to decompress (by washing dishes...)
 

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Just a thought because my babe was similar, but are you breastfeeding? If so , maybe something you are eating might be bothering her.

I got fed up with my dd2 at about 4 months. I just kept asking her "What can I do to make you happy??" I totally devoted ALL ofmy time to her and it was catching up with me. And the rest of my family didn't like it either.

As soon as I went on an elimination diet, her attitude seemed to change and she was more content. Now she will play for 3-5 minutes on the floor with some toys and likes to sit and roll around. But she still has her days.

Like tonight for instance. I had her in the sling for a large portion of the day because we were out and she ended up with a diaper rash all over her vulva because of the heat. When we got home I just let her air out until bedtime when I put the diaper on her and some ointment and she just started to cry (poor thing) and she got so upset it took her a good 45 minutes to get calmed. Some things just get her going ! Must be the irish in her blood


 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
teething -- i don't know. we've been wondering if shes teething for months now... :LOL ... so i guess she ALWAYS seems cranky enough to be teething. i don't know.


and maybe a growth spurt too, i'm not sure. she isnt ALWAYS this bad.... but lately, ugh.

and i don't know about my diet. ugh, i hope thats not what it is....
.... are there any specific usual culprits?
 

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This is just a random idea-- is she getting good daytime sleep? What you describe sounds like what my ds does if he doesn't get a couple of good naps.

Around that age, my ds started to not be able to sleep unless he was in a calm, quiet, dark place. Sometimes he wants to sleep, but he's too keyed up.

He will actually fight going to sleep by trying to wriggle out of my arms, and then the next second he's zonked out. If I do what he seems to want and put him down, I'm just prolonging the misery for us both. The longer I wait to try and nurse/rock him to sleep, the harder it will be to actually soothe him.

I don't know; it's just a thought.

In the meantime, I hope you're getting a chance to recharge your batteries!
 

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It does sound like your baby is uncomfortable for some reason- and thus only temporarily distractable. I agree with the PP that investigating breastfeeding allergies is a logical place to start investigating.

Here's the Kellymom link about it:
http://kellymom.com/babyconcerns/food-sensitivity.html
<snip>
What foods are most likely to be a problem?
Some of the most likely suspects are cow's milk products, soy, wheat, corn, eggs, and peanuts.
</snip>

Good-luck and chin up! This too will pass.
 

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kirei - i should have mentioned that dd has been a lot better for the past few days and had been worse before that. the culprit, i think, was caffeine. dh had stopped making me decaf coffee. i was only drinking a cup, but i think that maybe she was getting the caf milk at different times because i have to pump (i work pt). i elim'd milk products but it didn't make a diff for us, although i have heard that they are often the culprit.

good luck!
 

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well for me- it was dairy, wheat, and anything in the nightshade family!!! But it sounds like maybe it is just something you are having here and there. I know my dd cannot handle when I have onions at all! Even onion powder!!! My poor babe. But she seems to be on the extremely sensitive end of things.
If there is any way that you could just get an hour to yourself and go for a nice stroll in the park or something it would help recharge your batteries.
 

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DD1 was like that as a baby (we had a short reprieve from 4-5.5 months but otherwise she was a fussy butt). She is still like that as a toddler. It's just her personality. And it can be difficult to handle at times. I know how exhausting it is to keep a constant stream of excitement/attention going. She was NOT a lap baby, needed constant movement. So if that's your case all I can offer is a bit of empathy.

DD2 (now 4 months) was only like that if I ate something that bothered her tummy. Our culprits are dairy, coffee (even decaf), tea (even decaf), and bananas. I also suspect corn and soy but haven't been brave enough to try to reintroduce them!

I hope that it's just a dietary thing and not a personality thing. Love DD1 but she's a challenge!
 

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Discussion Starter · #12 ·
Okay, I'm going to try a diet. I also am going to cut out the caffeine..
: .... it'll be better for both of us ANYWAY. Maybe she won't be so wired without the caffeine, I don't know.

Anyway, its only 2:40pm but I'm already looking forward to when shes asleep for the night. Want to know something strange? Going out and doing something is sometimes the best thing for us both -- but only during the day. She actually does okay in her carseat ... considering the fact that I've gone out every day with her since we came home, I guess. She enjoys seeing new things, being around people (she LOVES people), and she handles the carseat alright for various amounts of time. For as much as I LOVE going out there -- I'm running out of places to go.
Sometimes I actually really want to stay home!! I love going shopping.... but I have to stop, of I end up wanting to buy everything.
:

Oh, okay, back to what I was saying....... uhm.... oh, the person who mentioned naps. I'm not sure what to say. I kind of don't think she gets enough sleep, but..... I also have a hard time getting her to fall asleep during the day. She'll fall asleep in the car, or sometimes nursing.... but then she usually gets woken up before she wakes on her own. I can NOT seem to move the carseat into the house without waking her. And yes, I have even tried letting her sleep in the car once we're home..... bad bad idea.
: Its too hot out now anyway, so that doesn't matter. And when she falls asleep nursing, I'll inevitably have to go to the bathroom SOMETIME.....

Anyway... I'm just really frustrated. 2:45pm, DH won't be home until... um... after 11pm.
I'm on my own today, and it sucks! She was just screaming a while ago... shes VERY cranky right now, and I tried putting her in the swing for a nap... she started crying almost immediately and I had to take a minute to turn on the AC ( I think we're both too hot ) and check here for some ideas. Its hard to hold her constantly because I start to feel really mad at her.
I don't want her to cry, but I don't want to lose it either.


Well... I'm nursing her now, and she's falling asleep. Thats another thing -- sometimes nursing works, and sometimes its just another thing shes cranky about!! I already tried nursing her earlier, and she didn't want it. NOW its putting her to sleep. This is how it went:

nursing = cranky
holding = cranky
floor time = cranky
jumping toy = cranky
holding again = cranky
swing for a nap = cranky
nursing = asleep

See what I mean? Its not as though nursing was the ANSWER... I already tried it. She didn't want it earlier, and I had to go through all the other things she didn't want either, before coming back to this... and NOW shes not cranky.

Anyway, I'm rambling, and blah.... you know, she isn't ALWAYS this bad. Its been for the past few days now that shes gotten SO SO cranky.... I donno. Sure, I've wondered about teething, but I just can't tell.

As for the elimination diet -- is it possible that she is allergic to, lets say... dairy, but it would sometimes bother her more than other times? Because otherwise it wouldnt really account for why shes MORE cranky than normal lately...

Either way I'm going to drop the caffeine I think. It can't be helping.

Thanks for the support mamas.
 

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I agree with PPs that something seems to be bothering her and that is why she is only temporarily distractable. DD (who is now 2.5 yrs) was exactly like that and we found her to have dairy and soy intolerances and silent reflux when she was 4 mos old. I suspected the silent reflux b/c she would pull off while nursing and cry, cough, kick her legs, and she had a sour smell to her breath. She was put on prilosec which definately helped, but what helped even more was removing the dairy and soy from diet. I BIG pain in the arse, but I had a happier babe so it was worth it. It doesn't last forever.

Hugs!
 

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Discussion Starter · #14 ·
I go back and forth wondering about reflux.... aghhhhhh I just don't know!! She arches her back when shes cranky a lot, but not generally when she is spitting up. She does spit up a LOT... but I sometimes think shes spits up because shes gotten so upset. Now, if shes upset because of reflux... yeah, I have no idea.

How soon will I see a difference if I start the diet?
 

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Discussion Starter · #15 ·
Oh, let me continue the "schedule" for the day now:

As I said, she fell asleep nursing. Okay, so...

woke up = happy
nursed a bit = happy
took some pictures = content
sitting with me = getting cranky
nursing = cranky
floor time = cranky (unless she is pulling apart all the wiring for the computer... yeah...)
sitting in papasan chair = intermittenly cranky
jumping toy = intermittenly cranky

So, now what... another nap? Heh. She woke up 30 - 45 minutes ago.


I guess we're going out now. I need something to eat anyway.
 

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I'm right with you!

Dd 4.5 months, has reflux (taking pepcid) and intolerant to dairy, soy, citrus, pork. Still adding foods in. Might have a wheat or corn issue too, but it's a skin reaction, and very mild. Going to investigate that in a few weeks when I have more variety in my diet.

She's also high needs, must be moving when awake or is not happy. And she has always been difficult to get to sleep.

I make a point of doing my best to NOT let her be awake for more than 2 hrs at a time during the day. Wakes at 6:30, let's try to nurse to sleep again. Doesn't want to sleep? Ok then we're going to try to nap at 8-8:30. If she wakes before 45 min, I either nurse her back to sleep or give a paci, which I hated to introduce, but it really helps with reflux and gets her to sleep better.

I always nurse her on our bed, that way once she is sleeping I can slide away. If I nurse her in arms she wakes immediately if there is a noise or I shift my weight. I spend a lot of time in bed, sometimes she needs 30-40 min of nursing (comfort sucking) to fall asleep, then I slip the paci in and sneak out.

She still spits a lot, spitting doesn't seem to hurt as the milk isn't so painful, but reflux w/o milk hurts her a lot. She'll burp and it'll hurt, tummy time can hurt, etc.

The elim diet wasn't the most exciting 3 weeks of my life, but it was worth it.
It can take about 2-3 weeks for dairy/soy to get out of your blood, and yes, if you have more dairy one day, she can be fussier. Have you kept a food journal? For me, it was about 12 hrs after a bad food that she'd get fussy. And 1/2 oz of cheese on a big pizza was enough to make her scream for 18 hrs.

Big culprits: dairy, soy, eggs, wheat, corn, pork, fish, peanuts, treenuts, shellfish, yeast, sugar

Safe foods (for most people): pears, apples, squash, turkey, chicken, lamb, potatoes, yams, millet, brown rice

If you decided to try the diet, I'd be glad to help you find meals... it can be frustrating when you only have 10 foods to pick from.
 

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The more I read about your dd the more she sounds like mine did. She still likes a lot of movement and attention. And LOVES to be out around people. Definitely hard getting to sleep, almost like she was always fighting it, even so young. I found nursing in the lying position really worked, just like the PP said. Then you have more of a chance slipping away

I used to put meals together one day a week and stick them in little foil packets in the freezer so whenever I wanted a meal I would just stick it in the oven and voila! Not that it has been the most exciting thing in the world but now she is happier and it is so worth it. Of course the family got pizza yesterday and I just about cried it smelled so good
.
 

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I started to see a difference in my DD maybe 4 days after removing dairy and soy, but as a PP said it can take 2-3 weeks before it's completely removed from your's and baby's system.

Reflux - from what you are describing, I would definitely check into it. DD NEVER actually spit up, it was Silent Reflux, so it would come up only part way, then burn her again on the way down. Her symptoms were CRANKINESS, crying jags, need of constant motion (to distract her from the pain), choking/coughing while nursing, sour smell to breath, back arching, twisting of the head/neck and eventual rejection of the breast. Some babes w/ reflux will want to nurse all the time, some others won't want to eat at all. DD was put on prilosec at 4 mos and we saw a major improvement w/in 3 days. DS (1 mo old) was just prescribed pepcid yesterday, and hopefully he will be happier soon.

IMO, I would start with talking to your doc about reflux before you mess up your whole diet (like you need to complicate your life!). If you dont see an improvement after a week of meds, stop them and try elim diet. If you see some improvement, but still some residual crankiness (like my DD), keep the meds and start elim diet.

Good luck to you!
 

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Discussion Starter · #20 ·
Well, we're seeing a new pediatrician and we don't have an appointment until June 23. That was the EARLIEST they could take us in, and I called them about 2 weeks ago. Since I have never seen this doctor before (and I don't know much about doctor appts in general, to be honest)..... should I call and ask to come in sooner? Explain that I wonder if she has reflux? Would they consider that reason enough to someone sqeeuze me in somewhere?

I'm going to cut out the caffeine regardless, for now. I'd like to see if it helps her relax a bit more.... this baby has endless energy, and doesn't fall asleep except by specific things (nursing to sleep, or in the swing... and neither of those ALWAYS work).

I'm also wondering if shes teething.... but I've thought so for a while. She's going crazy with reaching for my fingers to put in her mouth, and she's biting down kinda hard on them. She does this thing where she buries her face into blankets or the floor or stuffed animals and screams, too....
... I haven't figured out what thats about. She isn't always UPSET when she does it either.
 
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