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MY DD is not interested in potty learning - am I doing something wrong?

548 Views 4 Replies 5 Participants Last post by  skj474
Hi everyone! I am hoping you can give me some advice. I have a wonderful 2.5 year old daughter who is the light of my life. But I worry that I am failing her because I haven't done much toward potty learning. She is not interested in using the potty at all, but I have also not encouraged her much. It is getting a little frustrating for me because she really doesn't like to get her diaper changed, and will gladly sit in poop rather than have me change it.

She has a small potty that she used to like to sit on. Lately, if I ask her if she wants to sit on it, she says "no potty". Sometimes, I let her run around naked, but not much. The other day, I let her wear big girl underwear for awhile, but I changed her out of them before she could mess them. It sounds dumb, but part of me doesn't want to have to deal with the mess. I know it sounds stupid and I should just get over it.

I guess my question is - what should I be doing to encourage her, without forcing her? I never push anything at all, of course, but should I let her wear underwear more around the house, and just deal with the messes? How does one tell if their child is ready?

Thanks in advance!
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I hope you get some replies, I'm in the same boat (ds is one day older than your dd!). He likes to sit on his potty, we read "everybody poops", sometimes he announces he is going "pee pee like daddy". But if he is pooping, he adamantly refuses to sit on his potty. The other day he was pooping, and he can have some rather large ones that don't want to come out, and he was struggling. I basically made him sit on it, and the poop fell right out. Afterwards he kept announcing he pooped on the potty, but he won't do it again.

I too have been reluctant to deal with it. I don't want to take his pants off and diaper off every two minutes when he feels like "playing potty" - especially with bulky cloth diapers, a doubler, and a cover. Such a pain to put back on! I don't really know how to encourage the potty use, without freaking him out or pushing him, or getting beyond my laziness to do it. Ds will sit in a soaking wet diaper or big pile of poo all day! I thought cloth was supposed to encourage them to potty train early because they won't want to sit in a wet diaper!! ah well...
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i have said it before, & i'll say it again... your kids are BABIES! they will learn to use the potty when they are ready & not before, whether you push them or don't even mention it.

my son was over 4.5 before he pooped on the potty. he did it willingly & has never had an accident. i was glad to change him, it is part of being a mom. (ok, maybe glad is too strong a word~
but i was WILLING to change him!) & i did not shame him or rush him. he accomplished it on his own time.

i looked at it this way: my best friend's daughter is severely autistic. she is still in pullups & she is almost seven. because of the extent to which she is afflicted, there is a possibility she will NEVER train. her mom gladly cleans her up without complaining, cleans entire poop covered rooms when her dd plays with her feces, as is common in kids with autism.

it is all in how you look at it. five years of poopy diapers in exchange for a happy, healthy kid? WHAT A BARGAIN!

i hope this helps you, i am really not trying to be snide or idealistic; i just think a lot of times parents think of when society says our kids should be able to use the potty, without remembering that each kid is different.

a lot of "potty-trained" two year olds really aren't, you know~ their PARENTS are trained, to know when to sit them on the potty!
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I posted a thread about this just a few weeks ago, and thought I would be the only one who was having this experience...
: There are sometimes that I have felt completely inferior as a mom because my almost three year old is still running around in diapers. (Quite happily, I might add...)

She has peed in the potty a grand total of once. I suggest severla times a day that we take off her diaper and sit on the potty, but she refuses flat out. I am afraid to do the naked thing because we're trying to sell our house and I'm not up to cleaning up pee and poop mess.

The best thought I've ever heard on the subject is what someone told me when I posted about this same thing "It will not hurt us to wait until they're ready to learn, but it may hurt them if we force them too early." (or something like that...)
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You are doing great! She will go when she is ready, don't worry about it
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