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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
<p>Just another vent because sometimes I need to do that!</p>
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<p>So a couple weeks ago I emailed my ex because I'd heard from his sister that he looked awful and his family thinks he might be using drugs.  Ex actually replied (which is unusual) saying he was really struggling, very depressed, etc. etc.  But denied using drugs.  He asked if I would be willing to meet in person because he really wants to change and become a father.  So I agreed to meet him.  I immediately sensed that he hadn't changed at all.  He *says* all the right things, but I was still getting an arrogant unapologetic vibe from him.  He has moved back to where his parents live (our hometown, an hour from where I'm living now) which I think is great and a step in the right direction.  BUT, his young girlfriend from the affair who is evil and has been with him every step of his downward spiral has moved with him :/  AND, they have moved in with his grandpa who is waiting for a spot at a nursing home and will then be leaving a really nice 2 bedroom house for them to live in for a really reasonable monthly cost.  So I'm not sure if it's actually him changing, or just the nice house that has brought him home.  When I saw him in person he was adamant that he wants to start seeing DS (who he hasn't seen since July).  I said that was fine and told him that he had to let me know by the end of Monday (the next day) which day and when.  Well I didn't hear from him until Wednesday and he emailed with the day and time (the coming Saturday) and informed me that he was bringing his mom along and the two of them were going to take DS out.  Umm.. NO!!  I responded saying that the agreement was for him to let me know on Monday and that unfortunately we now had plans for the weekend.  And also because DS hasn't even seen him since last July that I will be staying with DS for the first visit or two (his mom is welcome to come, but that doesn't mean I'm not there too!)  I also gave him a couple other options for dates but said I needed at least 4 days notice for any visits.  And I haven't heard from him since :/  </p>
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<p>AGHGHGHGH!!!!!  WHY IS HE SO FRUSTRATING!!!!!  Why bother asking me to help him and saying he's changed and really wants to be involved?!?!  I guess I never should have emailed him, but I was genuinely worried.  I should have known that anything with him is a giant waste of time and that all he would do is lie.  </p>
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<p>And also, why on earth is he STILL with that damn girl???  She was 18 when he met her.  He is a totally different person now - he used to be such a nice guy, a great friend, great father, great husband.  Now he has gained weight and looks awful, he is rude, selfish, uninvolved with his family and friends.  It's been almost 3 years since they met and 2 years since we separated.  When is their fun in the sun going to be over so that he can snap back to reality and be a father???  I don't think he ever will as long as she is around.  </p>
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
<p>I've wondered that before but I don't think she is..  I'm really close to my ex-sil and she hasn't said anything about that, she would tell me if she'd heard something.  They are both extremely immature and selfish people though, so I really really hope not!  </p>
 

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<p>oh hon- how awful- i am sorry</p>
 
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