[jaxxy]

I'm not sure if this is in the wrong place.... I have a 4 1/2 month old DS that I am EBF. I have NIP with him at the mall, restaurant, ball game-where ever. I have never gotton a negative comment or a dirty look (that I noticed).

So, yesterday at work I went to pump as usual but my normal room was being occupied all day so I went to the administrative wing ask the HR girl where to go and while she got another room ready I asked the payroll girl if I could use her tape. (I have to use a string of manilla folders taped to the window for privacy until the blinds come in) As she was handing the tape over she said "why don't you take care of that at home?!"

I actually thought I heard her wrong because she is the sweetest lady!

I went on about my business and when I got back to my desk a while later she had emailed me an appology about how she couldn't believe she had said such a thing and asked me to forgive her- which I promptly did.

I don't care one bit what she thinks but it just floored me. Especially coming from another woman. She obviously has never nursed children or she would realize that it isn't exactly fun to pump at work and I don't enjoy missing all of my breaks chatting with my co-workers and luch time walks to get it done. Not to mention there is NO way to go 10 hours in a day without pumping and be able to feed your child BM exclusively. It's not like he is a year old...or even eating solids yet!

I do have to say that my company has been VERY accomodating to my needs as a new mom-so no complaints there.

Thanks for listening to my vent!

 

[widdlelou]

Well at least she quickly realized her mistake and owned up to it. Good for her to see she was being terrible! And its great that you have had a so far accomadating work environment.

 

[MiamiMami]

Send her an email accepting her apology, and maybe educate her a little.

 

[MomtoEd]

I think if you accepted her apology and told her the same things you listed in your letter about the realities of EBF you could go a long way towards acceptance and education. I think a candid conversation saying, "It's not always great and fun, but I think it's important enough to do for my child because..." goes so much further in winning acceptance than the "If you don't automatically agree with me, then you're stupid!" response.

 

[homewithtwinsmama]

She was from the HR DEPT.

:

 

[Claire and Boys]

Yeah, some people just don't realise how bf/pumping works. I mentioned to dh's niece about pumping at work and she looked confused and said "But can't you freeze milk?" She didn't understand about needing to pump regularly to keep up supply.

 

[ulla]

No, she was a bookkeeper. I wouldn't expect a "payroll girl" who is so young and presumably doesn't have children to know the first thing about breastfeeding or pumping. Nobody can be expected to know everything, especially things that are not relevant to their own lives. I don't think it's worth getting worked up about it.

Breastfeeding is one of those things that is only of interest to the people doing it. My three boys were all breastfed, but if I were to start a conversation about breastfeeding with them or their girlfriends all I'd get would be some polite "Uh-huh"s and "Oh really"s and then a whole lotta eyerolling when I left the room. They just don't care about it at this point in their lives. And that's fine. They have plenty of time to care about it later.

 

[* guest *]

Aww, I'm glad she caught her mistake and apologised.

 

[rupiezum]

Quote:

Originally Posted by homewithtwinsmama She was from the HR DEPT. :

Actually, if I'm reading the original post correctly, the woman who made the comment was from payroll.

 

[rupiezum]

Wow. I do think it's great that she realized she'd said something awful and apologized for it. And like you say, she probably just doesn't get it. Most of the people who say things like, "Can't you just feed him pumped milk in a bottle when you're out?" or "Something must be wrong, he's always hungry," and so on just don't understand. Now you have an opportunity to educate her a little - maybe just a "this is why I have to pump" basic explanation, and let her know that she can always ask you if she has any questions about pumping, etc.

oh, and Good for you for pumping!

 

[fishface]

I agree w/ explaining WHY you have to pump -- your advice might save her own BF relationship someday!

 

[mntnmom]

Maybe you could send her a nice little article about pumping, and how it needs to be done to keep up supply.
It sounds to me like maybe she wasn't being snarky, but really thought it was something you could do at home and save yourself the trouble?
To a lot of folks this BF/ pumping @ work thing really is completely foreign. They might not be against it, but genuinely ignorant.

 

[jaxxy]

Quote:

Originally Posted by ulla No, she was a bookkeeper. I wouldn't expect a "payroll girl" who is so young and presumably doesn't have children to know the first thing about breastfeeding or pumping. Nobody can be expected to know everything, especially things that are not relevant to their own lives. I don't think it's worth getting worked up about it.

I agree, I didn't get worked up over it. I really couldn't care any less how she feels about it. But I have to mention that she is a grown woman with grown children so she obviously didn't BF. I accepted her appology immediately (even though I am sure it is because she knew she shouldn't have said something like that and it is even worse being that she is in administration). She is normally a super sweet lady. I didn't take the opportunity to educate her because I didn't feel it was appropriate over company email and my company is really supportive of me being a new mama already. (everyone other than the payroll girl that is

)

I just felt the need to share because it was the first time anyone really did anything like that to me since I started nursing almost 5 months ago.

 

[rupiezum]

It can be good to have a place to vent.