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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I have picked out. But he has no suggestions. WTF?

I basically picked our last name - it was between two names. He had NO input other than saying ok to the name Holden. The other name we didn't use is the name I'm hoping to use for a middle name this time. He liked it just fine then, but doesn't like it now. BUT HE HAS NO OTHER NAMES. So I'm wondering, what would you do? I am not going to come up with a list for him. I had my list, I have carried this name for the 9 months I've carried this baby and without any input, that's what this baby is to me. He is Finley Sebastian (Finn). I am not going to force a name on him that he hates, but if he has no other suggestions, I think it's reasonable to say that's what this baby will be called. No? I even asked him for ONE other name that he liked and he had nothing. Nothing at all.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
I did. I asked him to give me some names he liked and we could sit down and discuss them. We'll see if he does. He tends to just sit on these things, same with other important decisions, so they just kind of get left to the default setting (vaxing, circ'ing etc). I don't know that my name should be the default setting but if he doesn't have any input, well...that's what it might be. Unless we go nameless!
 

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I agree with the others.

I can tell you what I do.
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DH rarely likes any names, there are the ones he hates so I cross those off, the meh ones, and then the ones he just doesn't comment on. That is about it. I discuss names, mention different ones, leave books lying around, nothing. Nothing ever happens. So when the baby is born, I decide the name, either one of the no comment or meh ones that I've mentioned over and over again to him because I figure if he hated it then he would of said something. At that point, he just goes along with it. Probably because he just witnessed me giving birth and isn't going to argue anything with me.
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I don't feel guilty, never have. He had 9 months to come up, something, anything, never does.
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Yeah really, I can't imagine a man choosing right after birth to argue with a woman about a name.
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I told him I'd discuss it with him and I even brought it up again today....he's got nothing! And honestly, I'm fine with him having nothing since this is the only name I LOVE, but I really don't want to hear him complaining if he brings nothing to the table.
 

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Aw! I have to chime in here. Finnley is going to be our boy's name, too, and it took awhile (probably a month) for it to grow on my DH. I found it in a baby book. My two cents is this -- if they don't come up with anything, they have to either learn to love the name we choose and not complain about it, or snap out of it and really start thinking about names themselves. And if they come up with only ONE name, we are still allowed to veto that name, especially if it's something excruciatingly horrible. I think the mom vote wins, hands down.

I could never use a name that my DH absolutely hated. But if he was open to thinking about it, then that means there's wiggle room. You have to use your magic powers of persuasion.

I say keep using the name. Try it on the baby. It really helped that I told DD the baby's name and she calls him Baby Finn. It really warmed over DH's heart and sold him on it.
 

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With DS, DH & I agreed on 'Finn', but didn't agree on the long form right up to the end! We ended up with Finnegan, and it works, and suits DS very well, but it was probably after the 8mth mark that we settled on it.

Our girl name, has been picked for 7 years. And yet, DH asked me the other day what the short form was going to be ... and got the first letter wrong! I think we're back on track now though, he'd just forgotten the details.
 

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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
Ha! Too funny Carrie.
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I still don't know how to spell it - I go between the two 'n's and then one, but I know it will be Finn regardless.

He said "I don't know, it sounds too Irish". What? So we aren't Irish. I don't care. He hasn't given me any Thai names - and our last name is a long enough Thai name to take over anyway. I don't know of any Slovakian names I like! Then he made a gesture as in 'lucky fin'. Ugh. I just love the name. I'm attached!
 

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Quote:
Originally Posted by veggiemomto2 View Post

Ha! Too funny Carrie.
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I still don't know how to spell it - I go between the two 'n's and then one, but I know it will be Finn regardless.
Just to add more spelling fun to it ... It's also spelled Finlay. :) We looked at nearly every variation of 'Finn' that we could during my pregnancy with DS! The most unusual one was actually Griffinn. Not that it's unusual on it's own, but it was the only one that wasn't very Irish, and had the Finn at the end!

Finnian, Finnegan, Finnley, Finlay, Finneas, Finbarr ..... (some I liked, most I didn't!) Any of those are far less Irish that the original version of Finley -- Fionnlagh! If your DH looks at the root spellings of Irish names, I think he might not think Finley is 'too Irish' after all!
 

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I like the two n's, that's what we are going with. I think we will call him Finn most of the time but I really like the full Finnley too. I adore the name. Good choice!! ms
 

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Our DS is Finn - his full name is Findlay (we found this spelling in a book) but most of the time we call him Finn - and we spell Finn with two N's even though there is only one in his full name. I realized that it doesn't really make sense to do it this way - but oh well. Too late now!

On a lighter note, when he was a chubby little baby my brother nicknamed him double chin Finn - I thought that was adorable!!

Now we are struggling with girl names. Hubby and I love Quinn, but to have a Quinn and a Finn sounds kinda cheesy. Also considering Mayra and McKenna....what do y'all think about those?
 

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I think Finn is adorable!

Names are hard. . .sometimes it's hard to understand why we like or don't like a name. I tend to want to know what the name MEANS before I'll o.k. it. I'd hate to name someone something that means "will have a hard life" or "temptress". heh heh.....

DH is really in love with the name Alicia, and I love what it means....so, we're good to go. Venus was a no brainer....she HAD to be a venus girl. Alicia Venus it is. Unless the universe turns topsy turvy and she demands another name at birth!!!

I'll be calling her Ali-Ve...or buttercup.
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I say that if your husband doesn't have anything better, he loses his turn and you get to go. You can't just say "no...but I don't want to play" and still have people listen to your input. If he has another name, he needs to put it on the table. Maybe he's afraid that you won't like it since your so sure of the name you like? men can be elusive..... because they have tender egos and are often really set apart from how they FEEL. In any case....it helped me to really accept that we could name our little girl (because I was so afraid to utter her name aloud least I jinx her..) by just sometimes writing it down, and saying it aloud in front of Dh....and then, I just started talking about her by name...and now, I can say it to others. "Alicia Venus" !!!! I don't care if other people don't like it (his family doesn't...it's too...non traditional. heh heh.....)

Good luck with baby Finn!
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I think Finn is such a wonderful name. I really love Holden, that was one of the two boy names I liked for DD (I was a single mama, so the name choice was mine). The other was Wade. DF veto'd both of those right off the bat. He and I had completely different taste in names. He didn't contribute much (Thomas, Isaac and Christopher were his only suggestions). I was afraid we would end up calling this one Balthazar forever, which was his pre-baby name, if you know what I mean. But then one day he said Malcolm, with the nickname Mal, and it just fit. It wasn't my favorite name ever but now I can't imagine anything else. Him finding the name allowed me a little more say about circ'ing and the middle name, too, which was nice.

Psulalie - Mayra isn't my favorite, but I've always thought Mckenna was very pretty. I think Quinn is a really pretty name, but the rhyme might be too much. DD is named Clementine and for a girl I love Caroline, too, but I think they just sound too similar.

OP - Have you explained to DH that in your head, this baby is already Finn? I feel like that makes a big difference. Not that he should agree to a name he doesn't like, but I think it would be really hard for me if this baby, who I've known as Malcolm for months, had to be called something else. If he can't come up with any names, though, I think you definitely get to choose.
 
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