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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
<p>As an infertile who chooses not to discuss it with family, I have always felt alone and seethingly jealous of pregnant women. For many years my husband and I had to endure much teasing about why we didn't have kids. Even after successfully conceiving and carrying my beautiful son (after two years of medical interventions), I still hated pregnant women.</p>
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<p>Now, after taking six months to conceive, I just lost my pregnancy at 5 1/2 weeks. On Thanksgiving. When my parents were here. Of course, having not told them I was pregnant, and knowing there was nothing that going to a doctor or hospital could do, I kept it to myself. My idiot mother (God love her) of course prattled on about giving my son a little brother or sister. GAH! You may think it wasn't fair that she didn't know, but trust me, she would have said many stupid things no matter what. When my sister miscarried twice and told everyone about it, my mom started scrutinizing EVERYTHING she did and ate, saying, "Oh, did the doctor say it was ok to drink soda?" or "Maybe you shouldn't drive while your pregnant." So I'm better off.</p>
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<p>I just wish people were more sensitive in general. I would never ask anyone why they didn't have kids, or if they were going to have more.</p>
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<p>I love, love, love my son, but now I ACHE for another baby. I have a demanding career, and am the breadwinner, so there is no way for me to quit right now, but it depresses me that I have to go back to work tomorrow and focus on work, when I am just so devastated. Also, I am almost 40, so I am beginning to feel like I may have run out of time. I'm both frustrated and terrified of getting back into TTC.</p>
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<p>Thanks for listening! I just had to vent.</p>
 

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<p> i'm so sorry and saddened to read this. <img alt="hug2.gif" src="http://files.mothering.com/images/smilies/hug2.gif"></p>
 

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<p>I'm so sorry for your loss, and I'm sorry your family isn't able to support you during this difficult time. <span><img alt="hug.gif" src="http://files.mothering.com/images/smilies/hug.gif"></span> I endured many hurtful comments after my first loss, most of which came from people who were just completely ignorant of the whole process of struggling to get and stay pregnant. I agree that we'd all be a lot better off if everyone would just keep their noses out of everyone else's business.</p>
 

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<p><span><img alt="hug.gif" src="http://files.mothering.com/images/smilies/hug.gif"> I'm so sorry you lost your baby</span> <span><img alt="candle.gif" src="http://files.mothering.com/images/smilies/candle.gif"></span></p>
<p><span>I can commiserate with the questions about more babies but I have a weird story about it. When I was about 9wks pg with Kadence (after two 2nd tri losses) I had a woman say to my youngest that I should give her a little brother. My daughter was looking at and trying to touch her baby boy who was born the month that my first m/c was due. The second baby I lost had been a boy.</span> My only response was "I keep trying" and then to pour out my stories on her. She then went on to tell me that she had three losses of her own at 16,18 and 20wks and that she would be praying for me (with tears in her eyes). Sometimes people say things and it hurts like crazy but they don't mean to do it.</p>
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
<p>Just got off the phone with the nurse at my doctor's office. She asked me a bunch of questions, was very sweet, and spent quite a bit of time talking to me. She said the doctor doesn't need to see me and I can start trying to conceive again after my next cycle. I'm glad I don't have to go through a doctor's appointment and any poking and prodding, but now I am suddenly very sad. I feel bad that I created this little potential person and now it's just...gone.<br></p>
 
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