[emma_goldman]

I just got Marshall B. Rosenberg's book about living with compassion through practicing nonviolent communication. I haven't even read it yet, but...<br><br>
I stopped our infamous neighborhood "tweaker" on the street (meth user) who burgled my house (I'm 95% positive it was him -even moreso after talking with him!). We were both nervous. But I spoke from the heart. I introduced myself and my babe (yes, I was holding him). And I brought up the burglary first thing. He blamed it on someone else (another infamous neighbor that I have a "working relationship" with -I think I'm misusing the term, but I mean that we have a mutual respect that works for us). And then I asked him where I would be able to find the items that were taken from my house. And THEN HE APOLOGIZED as we were saying our farewells -"Sorry about that!" And do you know what? I really needed that. I had been feeling a ghost-like presence in my life. A real uneasiness, and sometimes anger. And now I'm healed.<br><br>
I had really been moved by something beyond myself to speak to him. I felt that the universe was bringing us together. It was just too coincidental that I have only ever seen him walking on a street adjacent to ours but on this particular day, there he was, walking right by my house just as I was getting baby out of the car after running an errand. So I called after him to stop. I had been wanting to do this since the sanctity of my home was violated. I had been afraid to talk to him, but was buoyed by the moment.<br><br>
And this is how I want to be! I want to speak my experience. I want to heal myself through investigation in the world. I want to seek peace and build peace. Wow. It was a cool experience. I felt so strong and able. It was a *spiritual* experience.<br><br>
Part of what I needed to see is that this guy is real. He has pain. And yet he has a capacity for compassion. And he has perspective that I can learn from.

 

[nicole lisa]

Wow, that's inspiring! I love NVC and as a family we're really trying to fully embrace it and being mindful about not just our words but hearing other people's words and feelings as well.<br><br>
It's so hard to reach out when you feel wronged, isn't it? But it can be so healing as well. And it's always so powerful to be heard.<br><br>
Approaching someone out of the blue and unplanned like that isn't always easy (heart beating fast etc), but it can make such a difference in how we process what's been happening in our lives and neighbourhoods. You're very brave.<br><br>
I'm so glad I read this first thing this morning - it's help set the tone for my day.

 

[WuWei]

You might be interested in our Consensual Living yahoogroup. Here is the link to the web site and group:<br><a href="http://www.consensual-living.com/" target="_blank">http://www.consensual-living.com/</a><br><a href="http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Consensual-living/?yguid=287472904" target="_blank">http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Consen...guid=287472904</a><br><br>
We choose to live consensually with our families and communities. It is a journey of self-awareness and self-control and assuming positive intent. NVC is a huge portion of the communication based in feelings and needs and seeking to identify and embrace the underlying needs to create solutions which are mutually agreeable.<br><br>
Pat

 

[*clementine*]

Wow. I didn't realize such a book exsisted. I'm going to get it! Thanks for the info.

 

[WuWei]

The <a href="http://www.cnvc.org" target="_blank">www.cnvc.org</a> site has a lot of articles and books available about using NVC in different situations. I specifically like the two NVC booklets: Parenting From Your Heart and Raising Children Compassionately. They are about $6 each and are transformative, eye-opening resources to change the dynamic toward cooperation.<br><br>
Here is a link to Inbal Kashtan's article: <span style="text-decoration:underline;">Parenting for Peace:</span> <a href="http://www.cnvc.org/prnt4peace.htm" target="_blank">http://www.cnvc.org/prnt4peace.htm</a><br><br>
Another article by Inbal Kashtan: <span style="text-decoration:underline;">Compassionate Connection: Attachment Parenting and Non-violent Communication</span> <a href="http://www.cnvc.org/motherin.htm" target="_blank">http://www.cnvc.org/motherin.htm</a><br><br>
And one from Marshall Rosenberg: <span style="text-decoration:underline;">Raising Children Compassionately</span>: <a href="http://www.cnvc.org/raisekds.htm" target="_blank">http://www.cnvc.org/raisekds.htm</a><br><br>
One I just found by Rosenberg: <span style="text-decoration:underline;">Anger and Domination Systems</span>: <a href="http://www.cnvc.org/anger.htm" target="_blank">http://www.cnvc.org/anger.htm</a><br><br><br>
Pat

 

[emma_goldman]

thank you for your comments, nicole lisa and WuWei! I am so grateful to share this with you. And thanks for the encouragement to deepen my practice...<br><br>
Peace out to you!<br>
Debora

 

[meemee]

well my life is full of synchronocity. in a couple of weeks i start a 14 week class in NVC which is right across from my house. i have the book and have been trying to practise it for a few months on my own now.

 

[nicole lisa]

meemee, I'm jealous! I've been atching the site for classes near me, but so far none of the dates have worked out for me. One day they will.<br><br>
Keep us posted on how the class goes. And right out your front door?! cool.