Mothering Forum banner
1 - 8 of 8 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
869 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Okay, nesting impulse has hit me hard this past week. I'm not talking diapers, or getting ready for the birth itself, but rather just trying to get my overall house in order for this new baby. And, of course, nothing seems to be going smoothly and I am just going crazy and stressing out. Trying not to stress, but...I really freaked out on DH a few days ago.

Part of this is that DS was born a month early, so I'm thinking we are only 4 weeks away from possibly having our new baby. When DS was born, we were utterly unprepared and it did all work out, despite some stress in the process! so I don't know why this is so stressful for me, but I just want to have it better/righter this time.

For example. We are trying to get a washer installed so I can do cloth diapers. Simple, right? Last time we weren't able to have a washer (long story). But anyway, we got one, and then it turns out we can't install it until the plumber comes. Then our building says we need to put in a new sink to accomodate the drainage. Then it turns out we have to get a new cabinet to put the sink on. As it turns out there are no non-toxic stock cabinets available, so we are making one. Then it turns out the sink isn't available for three weeks and we can't get the cabinet made for another three weeks after that. On and on, you get the picture. So, what started out as a simple matter two months ago, is now extending 6-10 weeks into the future - right when the baby should be arriving. ARGHH!! Anyway, things are getting better - we have a sink, and should have a cabinet next week. But this kind of thing is tearing me apart.

And in general this is things have been going. For another example, my mother is coming to visit and made a strong request for a futon frame so she doesn't have to sleep on the floor, now or when the baby comes. We were supposed to have it delivered by the store last night. But that was teh one night we HAD to be out, and then our babysitter cancelled at the last minute so no one was here to get the futon. That was our one chance to have it delivered on time - or even while my mother is still here. So we thought, oh we will just go pick it up today before she arrives. But - guess what?!? The Chicago marathon is happening, and all the streets are blocked off. Plus we have no idea if this frame will even fit in our car. ARGHHH!

There are more such sagas. I realize these kind of things can happen in everyday life. But normally they don't bring me to tears. So, I'm just curious if anyone else is dealing with preparation issues in their "nests".
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,393 Posts
Oh you are singing my song! I was in the same place as you. I can't tell you what happened excatly, but I knew although my energy was with good intentions, I had to let it go.

Just thinking about getting my house ready for a home birth, you can think about all those things you need and hope the kits are delivered on time, that you have the right things, etc. I realized we have the ability to improvise, and we will never have everything taken care of, so let's quit aiming to get it perfect. We have lived in our place one year, and we have SOOO much work left on the house, but I had to relax.

Our babies need us to healthy feelings and hormones to them, not our stresses, so I just decided to give up and know that it will all work out in the end.

You can cd once all of this nightmare washing machine saga ends (and it SOUNDS like a nightmare!). Your baby will not hold a grudge if you get some chlorine-free disposables for a few weeks. My mom sleeps on those nice air matresses (at any bed, bath, beyond or linens n' things) that are about $100 and are always helpful to have around.

Only other advice is to see if there is any misdirected anxiety about the birth and the increase in work ahead of you. Deal with that to have a healthier birth, of course.

Good luck, enjoy your mom's visit, and take a deep breath! You are being too hard on yourself!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,714 Posts
i wish i wish i had some sort of nesting urge

the babies room is a mess and i have lots of things i need to do like clean the carry cot, it was in the garage and is filthy and i need to clear out under stairs cupboard and lots of other jobs (we only moved here 6 weeks ago) and i just cannot get motivated.

i guess maybe i am focused on my almost 5yo's birthday this wednesday, but i still cant face doing the jobs.

i am hoping the nesting urge will kick in soon and so i can get motivated.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
614 Posts
oh yeah - i hear you! Just seems like things are difficult rather than easy, right? Here's one for you so you don't feel alone! Finally, DH decides to put down the bamboo flooring in our bedroom. We did DD's room back in April/May. This is the stuff that is actual bamboo, not laminate. So it has to be glued down, the floor has to be leveled with concrete b/c our slab was laid incorrectly back when they built the house in the '70s, it's tough to cut (lots of fumes even though we bought the lowest level of chemicals on the market) etc. Big job - not the weekender that laminate is. Anyway. The wood comes in in January. DH gets around to doing DD's room in April/May. Our bedroom is supposed to be next and the boxes of flooring have been in my living room since January. He decides to move everything out of our bedroom this weekend and do the first step - rip up the carpet and baseboards. So our bed is now in DD's room - a lot of her toys had to come out to make room for stuff in our closet, the living room is also packed with stuff (my laundry station/changing table with all the cloth diapers), toys, books, night tables, etc.

DD is pleased as punch that she gets to sleep with Mama again (ugh - kicking, moving, heat seeking 4 year old that just got into her own bed in May anyway!) So we're going backwards now on that front.

DH has ripped up all the carpet and then calls me in and has me take a look at the bathroom floor. The people who owned before us had laid down tile on top of laminate. Idiots! He wants to rip up the bathroom floor. Now this has been a project that has been on the list since we moved in 3 years ago. Our bathroom is 1/2 scraped, the cabinet is falling apart; it totally needs to be redone and we've lived with it for the last 3 years. He's essentially offering to re-do it b/c once the floor comes up, then it starts the whole process. But I also know that if he starts the bathroom, there is no chance in hell it will be ready for when the baby comes. We're talking I will have the use of one bathroom (DD's, across the house) for the next year minimum. 2 a.m. changing? Surprise, explosive poop? Trek my ass across the house and through DD's room to rinse the dipe and any clothes out. Baths, which DD loves? Sorry - has to be a shower (which is the only option in her bathroom).

Long story ending here. I said Nope. Part of me can't believe I said No since that means another 1-2 years with the bathroom like that, but I need that bathroom for the new babe!

So while waiting for your washer, think of me with all my stuff all over the house being kicked in the middle of the night by a 4 year old, not knowing if our bedroom will be ready for the new babe or not. And certain the house won't be ready for my blessingway in a month. It could be worse. We could live in a tiny apt. in NYC. Or not have a home at all ala New Orleans. But those thoughts really don't help when you feel like crying due to all the mess and in your case blocked off streets!!!!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
8,238 Posts
Oh no! That sounds soooo stressful!! I hope everything comes together quickly for you! Or that baby decides to stay in until due date! LOL

I've been having the urge to declutter and get rid of stuff but pretty much that is all we have to do. I could really clean my tile grout on the kitchen floor but I dont feel like it. LOL DH gave the tub a super duper scrub down so that was nice. But it will definately need to be done again a few times before baby comes! LOL
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
869 Posts
Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Thank you so much for your replies! Girrlie, especially - sounds like you ahve a nightmare situation on your hands too.

My update is that my mother came to stay with us for a week. Today we've been working like madwomen, clearing things out. The other drama I didn't mention in my first post was that last week we had some extensive water damage repaired and had to clear out the whole front hallway closet, which is also my pantry. There was plastering dust everywhere which noone told me would happen....anyway, that's over...but today we have been putting everything back in place, and much better than before. Plus getting everything ready for the big diaperroom washing machine switcheroo - our carpenter friend is coming over to take final measurements and get cracking. Plus we are getting the fution frame FINALLY delivered tonight.

So I'm not as freaked out but still most definitely in nesting mode. And in the meantime our house is still a wreck but its all in the name of progress. Right?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
869 Posts
Discussion Starter · #7 ·
I had to dig up this thread from last month because my washing machine saga is STILL not over. But it is getting to be kind of funny.


So, all in the name of getting a washing machine for our laundry/changing room (should have been a simple matter of just hooking up the hoses, right?) we did the following over the past month:

a. got a new giant sink for drainage
b. got new cabinets to accomodate the giant sink
c. got a new countertop to hold up the giant sink
d. repainted the room (our first painter quit and we had to find a new one at the last minute, but that worked out, just took a week instead of a day)
e. put down some carpeting
f. moved in the furniture (dresser, shelves)

THEN
g. the plumber came and said "Oh, we have no idea how to hook up the drainage hose into the sink". (CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS? Isn't that what plumbers do?!?!?!?! This is not rocket science. The need for a special drain pipe was what made us make ALL of the above changes. At this point I am reeling in shock and disbelief. It is like we just hiked 100 miles only to be told we are on the wrong mountain.)
h. DS tipped over the new changing table/ dresser on top of himself - luckily through some miracle he didn't get hurt

THEN - our saga is interrupted for a brief ray of sunshine!
i. My dad came to town for two days. He took one look at the drain pipe situation, went to the hardware store, came back - and had the dumb thing fixed and working in FIVE MINUTES. Hooray for Dad!
j. We run two successful laundry loads! Hooray! Dad leaves.

THEN - back to the status quo
k. I get ambitious and run one more load of laundry, larger than before. So far, so good.
l. The entire room floods. Two inches of water, all over our new carpet, new furniture, everything. It turns out that I forgot to check the sink, and DH left the drain in after giving DS a bath. My fault, but oh so stupid.
m. I reach into the water to take out the drain, and feel a very slight electric shock. Use a comb to fish out the drain. Start trying to sop up the water ont he floor and feel the shock again. Realize that a faulty light switch has also gotten soaked. Rapidly unplug it - everything is fine, lucky I didn't really get shocked...
n. We clean it up, the world is fine. BUT everything is in disarray, just where it was a few days ago.

Will this saga never end?! I am starting to wonder. At least I am laughing at this point. I think it will all be okay.

 

·
Registered
Joined
·
98 Posts
I would b going crazy... if i had washer problems... i do at least a load or 2 a day every day as it is.... if i got backed up iw ould never catch up again... i really need to finish getting our spare room set up for my momma. but other than that it is just general cleaning here which is NEVER ENDING.. trying to get the boys to clean up after themselves HA.... i am on little boy bedroom cleaning strike #1 can't bend over that long to pick up toys
#2 the toys just end up back on the floor 30 mins later. not to mention my oldest son had decided he is scared of his room after living here for almost a year.... not b/c of monsters.. but b/c it is messy.... when i ask him to clean his room he says he doesn't like his room so he doesn't want to clean it.... UGH.........so no huge house disasters just all the little ones that go along with toddlers and seem so much more overwhelming when ready to deliver a baby anyday.
 
1 - 8 of 8 Posts
This is an older thread, you may not receive a response, and could be reviving an old thread. Please consider creating a new thread.
Top