[<~*MamaRose*~>]

I find that my parenting is all over the map but especially with my youngest....I need to reevaluate STAT.<br><br>
Obviously this is a direct result of all the crazy/ negative behavior between ex and I prior to the separation but now what! I'm on my own holding a bag of family mess!!!! I'm not comfy with myself and my parenting choices to date. I have no clear style of anything but I desperately want to change that but have no clue where to start. I want to embrace a more "AP & GD" style but don't even know where to start and would love a good book recommendation.<br>
Also I would love a book recommendation for single moms in the heal process after separation that flows with the above mentioned mindset.<br><br>
Did anything I just typed make ANY sense to anyone LOL!

 

[pranamama]

I liked the Alfie Kohn book I read <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> Punished by rewards.

 

[Holland73]

"Punished by Rewards" is fabulous. I liked it far better than his Unconditional Parenting, as I personally found Unconditional Parenting to be too much of an idealistic dream.<br><br>
Another great one is Barbara Coloroso's "Kids are worth it!"

 

[MsChatsAlot]

Great book suggestions.<br><br>
Debbie Ford has a book called, "Spiritual Divorce" that may really help you.<br><br>
The great part in all of this is that today is a new day. I've read a wonderful parenting book that looks at parenting like a map.<br><br>
Look where you've come from. Look at where you are now. Then decide where is it you want to go. And, from right now, you can start mapping out the direction you want to take and start moving in that direction.<br><br>
A separtion/divorce is tough for everyone and be patient with yourself and your kids. You've all been through a lot and are going through some changes. Take a moment to breathe, figure out what you want to do and aim for better. Each moment and each day you get to start fresh, so take advantage of that and do the best you can.<br><br>
Much love and support to you.

 

[<~*MamaRose*~>]

Thank you for the recommendations and the advice!!!!<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>pranamama</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7990106"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I liked the Alfie Kohn book I read <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> Punished by rewards.</div>
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I ordered it!<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>MsChatsAlot</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7992410"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Debbie Ford has a book called, "Spiritual Divorce" that may really help you.</div>
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I've ordered this one too!<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Holland73</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7990956"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Another great one is Barbara Coloroso's "Kids are worth it!"</div>
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My SIL has this book and agreed to lend it to me.<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>MsChatsAlot</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7992410"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">The great part in all of this is that today is a new day. I've read a wonderful parenting book that looks at parenting like a map.</div>
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Is this book the book you mentioned above?