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It sounds like this is a pretty big concern you're facing right now

ITA w/Lynn and mamaduck. I'm also really uncomfortable placing labels (either positive or negative) onto anyone, especially a small child. I think it's important, as mamaduck mentioned, to try and look at his behavior through a more positive lens
It might be really challenging to find positives in behavior you're judging as negative, but it's totally possible. Even if it seems silly or unnatural to relabel actions, it can really help.

As far as your "pest" relatives, something that was so critical for me to learn is that:we choose our reactions and our responses.No one makes me be emotional or makes me angry or annoyed. I'm picking these responses. I could choose, with however great difficulty
to react with a neutral voice or a calm: please stop.

What if what you consider pestering is, for your little, his way of asking for your attention? What you see as pest behavior (b/c of what you've seen from your father) might be completely benign to someone else. I think we all have our personal tolerance levels. I really have a hard time dealing with loud as a mother of three under seven, I've had to adjust my personal comfort levels b/c it's unrealistic and unfair to my dc to expect that they tiptoe and whisper.

I think it's really important to remember he is NOT doing this to be intentionally annoying, irritating or to bug you--despite having, from what I've read, an annoying grandfather
. He's simply being and doing what he's capable of at that moment. He's innately good
Humans are so much more complex, IMO, than if he does this and I do this, he will always do this. Things won't always be this way. Y'all will both learn together, and with each passing day, his communication skils and abilities will grow.

Hang in, mama
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