Joined
·
1,125 Posts
For five days now, my 13 month old has been whining. All day. Really. It is driving me NUTS!!! I'm sure many of you have experienced this- how do you handle it?
Near constant whining in 13 mo. old- what to do?
1 - 18 of 18 Posts
Joined
·
1,343 Posts
Quote:
OMG
I was going to say THE EXACT SAME THING but you beat me to it. Every time I am motivated to come on MDC and post about something that is driving me crazy and has led me to the end of my rope, there's a tooth within 48 hours.
Kids.
![]()
:
Originally Posted by Geofizz Check the gums. I'd be willing to bet good $$ that it's teething. |
OMG
I was going to say THE EXACT SAME THING but you beat me to it. Every time I am motivated to come on MDC and post about something that is driving me crazy and has led me to the end of my rope, there's a tooth within 48 hours.
Kids.
my dd went through that last summer at the same age....
I took to singing (in a loud, off-key way)..
Serenity NOOOOWWW, Serenity NOOOWWWW... and then I'd make up a little song. Still do this when I want to keep my sanity.
The whining.. ugh. It's enough to make me climb the walls.
But, this too shall pass!!
I took to singing (in a loud, off-key way)..
Serenity NOOOOWWW, Serenity NOOOWWWW... and then I'd make up a little song. Still do this when I want to keep my sanity.
The whining.. ugh. It's enough to make me climb the walls.
But, this too shall pass!!
Joined
·
4,932 Posts
I found that using sign language with my toddlers dramatically reduced their whining. Is your dd able to communicate with you through words or signs? The whining could be the result of frustration if she doesn't have another way to communicate.
Sure, my guys still whine, but almost always stop as soon as I remind them to "please use words or signs." Usually they want help, or water, or nursing, or to be picked up.
No one can stand that whining sound, so it's really a very effective way to get your attention! Perhaps teaching your dd an equally effective, and much more pleasant method would help.
HTH!
Lex
Sure, my guys still whine, but almost always stop as soon as I remind them to "please use words or signs." Usually they want help, or water, or nursing, or to be picked up.
No one can stand that whining sound, so it's really a very effective way to get your attention! Perhaps teaching your dd an equally effective, and much more pleasant method would help.
HTH!
Lex
I tried to think about it from my dd's perspective - how frustrating it must be to be struggling to do things, to communicate but not having all the skills yet.
And when that stopped working, I tried to make sure I got out away, out of the house as soon as dh got home from work. Did that about twice a week.
And when that stopped working, I tried to make sure I got out away, out of the house as soon as dh got home from work. Did that about twice a week.
I agree about the teeth, and would suggest lots of time outdoors, doing something physical and engrossing, if your dc is anything like mine.
Lexbeach, I am stunned that you can tell your 15-month-olds to "use their signs/words" and they DO it. I'm going to try it. I have been asking Bleuet to tell me signs, like "What is the sign for doggie?" and he is not getting it yet, so I figured it wasn't possible yet. It is so good to hear from other mothers what their littles are doing. Otherwise I figure if Bleuet isn't doing it, it's because he CAN'T (developmentally), and then I don't even try because I don't want to push him to something impossible for his current abilities.
I think I need to hang out in the toddler forum more!
![]()
Lexbeach, I am stunned that you can tell your 15-month-olds to "use their signs/words" and they DO it. I'm going to try it. I have been asking Bleuet to tell me signs, like "What is the sign for doggie?" and he is not getting it yet, so I figured it wasn't possible yet. It is so good to hear from other mothers what their littles are doing. Otherwise I figure if Bleuet isn't doing it, it's because he CAN'T (developmentally), and then I don't even try because I don't want to push him to something impossible for his current abilities.
I think I need to hang out in the toddler forum more!
Joined
·
7,984 Posts
Quote:
I think that's a bit unusual. At 15 months, my daughter had 4 signs: "more", "all done", "nurse", and "water". She could only use them if she was feeling pretty good. If she were at all tired, grumpy, hungry, or hurting, all these flew out the window. Even now (22 mo) she's up to 3 word sentances with a nearly bottomless vocabulary, but when she's out of sorts, she can barely respond "yes" or "no" to questions, let along "use her words."
(Anxiously awaiting the day when that last eye tooth pops through. Yeah, the one that first showed up under the surface last November.)
Originally Posted by Bleu Lexbeach, I am stunned that you can tell your 15-month-olds to "use their signs/words" and they DO it. |
(Anxiously awaiting the day when that last eye tooth pops through. Yeah, the one that first showed up under the surface last November.)
We've had the same experience as lexbeach with our 15-month-old--now instead of whining, Maddie says "help" (while signing it too) *all* the time. The change was instant for us, actually--I told her once and it really put an end to the whining for now (we told her this about 3 weeks ago, I think). She is unusually verbal, though--it was clear she just hadn't put it together to communicate her frustration in another way.
It's definitely worth trying!
It's definitely worth trying!
I agree with the other posters - in my 13 mo ds it is usually teeth, being hot, being hungry which since he is just really starting to eat solids with fervor is kinda tricky for me, and then there is just needing me - i sometimes think that since he is so mobile and able to play on his own that sometimes he gets too much of that -
so when he is whining I lower my standards of what i need to get done and play with him or feed him food or ice - he loves ice and i also make chamomile tea popsicles with those tupperware popsicle things.
oh, and I just today got up the nerve to put two chairs side by side in front of the sink and let him play with water - he loved it and didn't fall so guess we will be doing that more -
good luck - whining drives me batty too!
so when he is whining I lower my standards of what i need to get done and play with him or feed him food or ice - he loves ice and i also make chamomile tea popsicles with those tupperware popsicle things.
oh, and I just today got up the nerve to put two chairs side by side in front of the sink and let him play with water - he loved it and didn't fall so guess we will be doing that more -
good luck - whining drives me batty too!
Joined
·
4,932 Posts
5{Lexbeach, I am stunned that you can tell your 15-month-olds to "use their signs/words" and they DO it. I'm going to try it. I have been asking Bleuet to tell me signs, like "What is the sign for doggie?" and he is not getting it yet, so I figured it wasn't possible yet.[/QUOTE]
I was surprised the first time I asked them to use their signs/words that it worked too. I am always surprised by how much any toddler understands! Perhaps I just lucked out with two guys who are happy to communicate (even mid-meltdown), but a few of my friends have signing toddlers of the same age who are equally responsive, so I don't think it's too unusual. I really think toddlers of this age are just HUNGRY for ways to communicate with us.
I took a sign-with-your-baby class, and the teacher said it is best NOT to ask your child to sign out of context. So asking your ds what the sign for doggie is when there is no doggie present is probably not the best idea. That said, Jasper loves to go through all his signs while he is nursing. Not so much anymore, but he used to do it all the time before he was talking. I could ask him to say any of his signs and he would do it. It was a nice way to show people what a signing baby looked like. He would only do it while nursing, though. Also, he had one spoken word, "hot," and when we would ask him to say "hot," he would pop off my nipple and say it so clearly and then quickly latch back on. It was so cute. But Luke has never signed out of context, and I think it's fairly rare, and probably not the best idea (could be confusing).
Re: signing for help. The sign for help is my FAVORITE sign! Most of the time when Luke and Jaz are/were whining, it is because they need help. They had no trouble picking it up, although I agree that it is their least concrete sign since it can be applied to so many situations. I just used it whenever they needed help (opening something, climbing on/off something, getting unstuck, etc.), and asked, "do you need help?" It was the fifth sign I introduced (after more, nurse, eat/food, and all-done). One night, Luke woke up in the middle of the night and started signing for help. Usually, he just wakes up and latches on to nurse, so this was really different. I asked him what he needed help with and he did the sign for diaper change. Sure enough, he had pooped! We used to always wake up to the boys signing for help in the morning too. They'd sign, "Help! More! Food!" They wanted breakfast at 6:00 a.m.
![]()
. Now they say, "hep!" while they sign, and sometimes don't even do the sign anymore.
I read somewhere that our babies/toddlers pretty much always understand twice as much as we think they do. I like to remember that fact as I anticipate what my boys will/won't be able to do. They often surprise me.
Lex
I was surprised the first time I asked them to use their signs/words that it worked too. I am always surprised by how much any toddler understands! Perhaps I just lucked out with two guys who are happy to communicate (even mid-meltdown), but a few of my friends have signing toddlers of the same age who are equally responsive, so I don't think it's too unusual. I really think toddlers of this age are just HUNGRY for ways to communicate with us.
I took a sign-with-your-baby class, and the teacher said it is best NOT to ask your child to sign out of context. So asking your ds what the sign for doggie is when there is no doggie present is probably not the best idea. That said, Jasper loves to go through all his signs while he is nursing. Not so much anymore, but he used to do it all the time before he was talking. I could ask him to say any of his signs and he would do it. It was a nice way to show people what a signing baby looked like. He would only do it while nursing, though. Also, he had one spoken word, "hot," and when we would ask him to say "hot," he would pop off my nipple and say it so clearly and then quickly latch back on. It was so cute. But Luke has never signed out of context, and I think it's fairly rare, and probably not the best idea (could be confusing).
Re: signing for help. The sign for help is my FAVORITE sign! Most of the time when Luke and Jaz are/were whining, it is because they need help. They had no trouble picking it up, although I agree that it is their least concrete sign since it can be applied to so many situations. I just used it whenever they needed help (opening something, climbing on/off something, getting unstuck, etc.), and asked, "do you need help?" It was the fifth sign I introduced (after more, nurse, eat/food, and all-done). One night, Luke woke up in the middle of the night and started signing for help. Usually, he just wakes up and latches on to nurse, so this was really different. I asked him what he needed help with and he did the sign for diaper change. Sure enough, he had pooped! We used to always wake up to the boys signing for help in the morning too. They'd sign, "Help! More! Food!" They wanted breakfast at 6:00 a.m.
I read somewhere that our babies/toddlers pretty much always understand twice as much as we think they do. I like to remember that fact as I anticipate what my boys will/won't be able to do. They often surprise me.
Lex
Joined
·
946 Posts
I have the problem, too. Some days its ALL day, others its just alittle bit...
I found it to be one of the following......tired.....hungry......wants my attention (I have my back turned and he doesn't say MAMA yet, so he whines) so he can sign to me to either read to him or get a particular toy, etc....
Sometimes he whines while PLAYING. I think it is the sound that a truck makes???..........
![]()
This one drives me up the wall.
![]()
I found it to be one of the following......tired.....hungry......wants my attention (I have my back turned and he doesn't say MAMA yet, so he whines) so he can sign to me to either read to him or get a particular toy, etc....
Sometimes he whines while PLAYING. I think it is the sound that a truck makes???..........
Hey there, just wanted to chime in and say how great signing is. We've been signing with my son since he was 12 months and he has dozens of signs now at 18 months. If he knows the sign, he'll use it. It's just a matter of teaching him all the ones he needs. I highly recommend it. (By the way, he does still whine from time to time, but it's mainly when he's either tired or when he can't communicate the way he'd like to.)
Quote:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Geofizz I think that's a bit unusual. At 15 months, my daughter had 4 signs: "more", "all done", "nurse", and "water". She could only use them if she was feeling pretty good. If she were at all tired, grumpy, hungry, or hurting, all these flew out the window. Even now (22 mo) she's up to 3 word sentances with a nearly bottomless vocabulary, but when she's out of sorts, she can barely respond "yes" or "no" to questions, let along "use her words." (Anxiously awaiting the day when that last eye tooth pops through. Yeah, the one that first showed up under the surface last November.) |
Joined
·
1,125 Posts
Thanks, everyone, for your replies.
At first I thought it was teeth because when it started (Saturday) I popped my finger in her mouth and DID find another molar. However, she has NEVER been fussy with teething yet, and she has twelve teeth. And, the tooth is all the way through and was when I found it on Saturday.
She is whining when she wants something. It has become more clear that those are the only times she is whining. I am always able to tell exactly what she wants because she is very verbally and physically communicative, (though we don't sign because I haven't had time to learn or teach them to her.) But this is a new breed of wanting- and I don't want her to think whining will get her what she wants.
I am not talking about things she can't get herself. She is a bit advanced and is more than capable of getting what she wants. She has been walking for 5 months, and now all of a sudden, she is "unable" to walk through the doorway to get outside, so she whines. She is "unable" to walk two feet to pick up her toy. *SIGH*
I finally hit upon something yesterday, I think. I started really encouraging her to go do/get what it is she wants before the whining really starts. Then when she does it, I go almost overboard praising her. I don't know if this is a good plan or not, but it is working and I am able to keep my sanity. (Though I almost lost it when she almost bit the tip of my thumb off yesterday, but that is another story!) And every once in a while I actually get what she wants for her. (Because she is still my little baby.)
Did I mention that the whining has replaced the rude "hey" she was always saying? I thought getting rid of "hey" would be great, but I'd give anything to go back to it!!!
![]()
At first I thought it was teeth because when it started (Saturday) I popped my finger in her mouth and DID find another molar. However, she has NEVER been fussy with teething yet, and she has twelve teeth. And, the tooth is all the way through and was when I found it on Saturday.
She is whining when she wants something. It has become more clear that those are the only times she is whining. I am always able to tell exactly what she wants because she is very verbally and physically communicative, (though we don't sign because I haven't had time to learn or teach them to her.) But this is a new breed of wanting- and I don't want her to think whining will get her what she wants.
I am not talking about things she can't get herself. She is a bit advanced and is more than capable of getting what she wants. She has been walking for 5 months, and now all of a sudden, she is "unable" to walk through the doorway to get outside, so she whines. She is "unable" to walk two feet to pick up her toy. *SIGH*
I finally hit upon something yesterday, I think. I started really encouraging her to go do/get what it is she wants before the whining really starts. Then when she does it, I go almost overboard praising her. I don't know if this is a good plan or not, but it is working and I am able to keep my sanity. (Though I almost lost it when she almost bit the tip of my thumb off yesterday, but that is another story!) And every once in a while I actually get what she wants for her. (Because she is still my little baby.)
Did I mention that the whining has replaced the rude "hey" she was always saying? I thought getting rid of "hey" would be great, but I'd give anything to go back to it!!!
Joined
·
5,019 Posts
Ahh...whining...my ds is a champion. I really like the idea of the "help" sign. Sometimes in his highchair he starts whining and I don't know if he wants "more" or is "all done." I've found that getting his attention, i.e. direct eye contact and saying something like "Ian, IAN, look at mommy -- do you want "more" or are you "all done?" works well. I do the sign at the same time, and after a few seconds I see the whining haze fade from his eyes & he will sign what he wants. I do need to introduce some more signs, though. Something for food/eat and/or hungry, I think.
I imagine it's just another one of those phases... it will pass. When DS took up whining around this age it was definitely frustration fueling the issue. Just wanting to have or do things and not being able to do things. Also, when he wanted something... food, a toy out of reach, etc. I taught him the sign for 'more' and our lives changed for the MAJOR better. A happy (mostly whine free!) household was once again mine.
1 - 18 of 18 Posts
