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I'm so sorry for your sister and her family.

The best thing you can do, IMO, is just listen whenever she needs you. Don't say anything nasty about her STBX (even if she's going off on him), because you never know what will change. She's probably going to waffle in her feelings towards him (perfectly normal). I don't know that there's much you can say beyond offering your unconditional love and support.

Also, I don't know how close you are to your niece, but she may need an adult to talk to (one that isn't directly involved).

Just having my extended family's support (even when they were several states away) was a comfort.
 
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