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Quote:

Originally Posted by savannahmomi
Ok i am putting this out there looking for help b/c i cant take it somedays. I hope that noone will look badly upon me but i guess that is your opinion.

Lately dd has been such a handful, i hate to say that her behavior is "the age" although i guess its possible.
But what do you do when she hits and hits and hits when she doesnt get what she wants, but doesnt listen when you tell her not to hit and explain why?
Remove yourself from striking distance. If she's hitting someone else, remove her from the situation. The old "use your words" trope is helpful, but not until she has calmed down a little. (You know, you talk with her about what she was feeling and how she could say that with words instead of hitting....also talk about how the person she hit feels and ask her what she would like to do about that....)

So far my ds has bitten and hit only me and my dh, mainly bitten, and up until now hasn't had too many words, so I have mainly gone with the "preserve my bodily integrity" idea. My dh is really good at talking about no biting.

Quote:

Originally Posted by savannahmomi
Or what do you do when its the 300th time that you have told her not to throw things, or dump out her drink on the table/floor/bed?
She's too little to respond to just your voice, you have to physically prevent her, if you can, by taking the object away.

Quote:

Originally Posted by savannahmomi
Or when she wont eat anything for a meal and askes for sugary snacks?
Don't give her any food you think will harm her, but offer her any food you think is tasty that you don't think is harmful. If she asks for sugary snacks and you don't think they are good for her, say no. I think you shouldn't have foods in your house (or at least, not in sight) that you aren't willing to feed her. (I recognize that this is hard in your mom's house though.
)

Quote:

Originally Posted by savannahmomi
or when she just wont listen to anything that you say, you might as well just talk to a wall b/c you may get a better response?
Most toddlers, as a rule:

*can't control their impulses, may not even be able to stop themselves when you say "stop"--you have to gently stop them!
*want to find out what will happen if they do something you don't like
*are really interested in any and all emotional reactions, even negative ones
*may do things just to see what you will do.

I am really sorry about your overall situation, it's so hard for me to parent with my mom on the phone in another city! I can't even imagine trying to be the mom while living with my mom, who has some seriously overwhelming energy. To the extent it's possible to enlist your mom as an ally, it would be good to do so. What would be helpful to you generally to get from her? For example, can you ask her to put things out of your dd's reach that she doesn't want her to have? Or can you ask her to not have sugary snacks in view?

Or would that just result in a toddler-like blow-up from your mom! :LOL
 
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