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<p>My 6 yo. dd has been asking a lot lately about how her sister and brother got into my tummy and how they came out......now I will admit this makes me a bit uncomfortable but I know this is my job and I don't want to go about it the wrong way....they simple "innocent" answers are not working anymore.....My mom never had the "Birds and Bee's" talk with me (I guess I just learned thru TV and other kids). I know I need to do it but I can't even use those words in front of my dh.....I have never been sexually abused or anything even close to that so I guess I am just an extremely shy person. </p>
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<p>I know it would make it so much easier on me if I had something to start with and then could add to it if she was still curious.....I know (on a side note) that lately she has been rubbing herself up against her carseat buckle between her legs and the other night I had to rub some calendula cream on her because she was a little irritated from her Underjams (she still wets the bed) and she laughed and kind of squirmed and I said "oh i'm sorry" and she said no I liked it. <img alt="eyesroll.gif" src="http://files.mothering.com/images/smilies/eyesroll.gif"> I have explained to them that those parts are private and that no one should ever touch them, so we have had that kind of talk but I never went into details about everything. </p>
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<p>I need something that my 4 yo. dd could understand also as I would like to only have to have this talk once, or at least that ice breaker talk. <img alt="redface.gif" src="http://files.mothering.com/images/smilies/redface.gif"> I will leave it up to my dh to take care of that talk with my ds...but he is only 2 yo. so maybe after this talk with the girls it will come easier to me. </p>
 

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<p>I don't have any book recommendations, but just thought I'd add that 3yo DS's penis often gets irritated around his (poorly done) circ (don't get me started) and he hates having any cream put on it. If I even barely touch it he backs away laughing and saying that it tickles. It's so sensitive he can't even stand to touch it himself.</p>
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<p>So whenever it makes you feel uncomfortable, just imagine me trying to put cream on my son while he insists that it tickles.</p>
 

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<p>I have a 5 yr old, and when she was 4, i got her "It's Not the Stork". There were parts I skipped over at first, but it's got a lot of great information.</p>
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<p>"It's Not the Stork" is perfect.</p>
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<p>As to answering questions. I like approach of "just stick to the facts". Answer completely, but don't necessarily offer more information than you really need to.</p>
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<p>This is how the conversations went with my dd, between the ages of 3 and 4.</p>
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<p>Stage 1: Age 3 1/2 or so</p>
<p>DD: Mom, how do babies grow?</p>
<p>Mom: There's a special place in the mother's body called a 'womb'. When a baby starts to grow, it has a special place there. You body starts to make a little nest for it, and as the baby grows, the mother's womb grows with it. After a long time (9 months) the baby has grown enough to be able to live on its own.</p>
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<p>Another occasion, she saw me on the toilet during my menstrual cycle (I dream of having privacy in the bathroom some day!). She asked why I was bleeding. I told her:</p>
<p>Mom: Remember the mother's womb? Well, every month the mother's body gets ready to make a place for the baby and makes extra cells in the womb. If the mother doesn't get pregnant that month, then the cells come out through her vagina, and she bleeds. So, if you see blood, it means that there's no baby that month.</p>
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<p>Stage 2: About 2 months later</p>
<p>Dd: Mom, how do the babies get in the womb? How do they get started?</p>
<p>Mom: Well, babies are made by mommies and daddies. There's an egg that comes from mommy, and a seed, called a sperm, that comes from daddy. When they meet up, they start to make a baby. The egg & sperm combine and travel to the womb for the baby to grow.</p>
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<p>Stage 3: Age 4</p>
<p>Dd: Mom, how does the sperm and the egg get together.</p>
<p>Mom: (deep breath) Well, the egg comes out of mommy from a special place above her womb. The sperm comes from daddy. Daddy and mommy put daddy's penis in mommy's vagina and the sperm come out. They swim up to the egg and one joins with an egg to make a baby.</p>
<p>Dd: (at the time she was convinced she was going to marry her brother): "I'm going to do that with T (her brother) when we get older.</p>
<p>Mom: (silent prayer that she never says that to anyone, along with firm concentration on my driving -- she always asked these questions in the car!. "I will not drive off the road, I will not drive off the road..")</p>
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<p>It wasn't as bad as I had thought, and once she had the full details, she was fine. Ds, interestingly enough, didn't ask any of these questions until after his sister had spilled the beans about the sperm and the egg. "hey T, did you know that you were made from a sperm and an egg from mommy and daddy!"</p>
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<p>And it's not the stork let them fill in details. I'm about to get the next in the series (sorry can't remember the title) because my kids are getting older.</p>
 

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<p><em>What's the Big Secret?</em> is a book we liked. Honestly, it's almost certainly not going to be the big deal that you think it will be. My DD was 6 when she finally really asked HOW the baby got in there, and I already had the book because I'd been expecting it since long before then. We read the book, had a discussion, and she said, "Why would anyone want to do THAT?" and that was about the end of it. She literally never mentioned it ever again, and that was about 4 months ago. lol</p>
 

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<p>Thanks so much, I think I will get both of these books and just use the one I like the best. Or I can at least handle. <img alt="smile.gif" src="http://files.mothering.com/images/smilies/smile.gif"></p>
 

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<p>I got a couple of books for my daughter back then. She was 6 at the time. I can only find one of the books right now. The title is " Before You Were Born" by Jennfier Davis. It's really neat. She enjoyed it and read it often. Also, the OB I went to had a big flip thing you open up that had the 9 months of pregnancy on it and she followed that like crazy the entire pregnancy!!</p>
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<p>_____________________________</p>
<p>Single mom to 15 year old son, 8 yr old daughter and 1 year old daughter</p>
 

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<p>We just got our 6 y.o. DD "It's Not the Stork" and we all really liked it. I'd recommend reading it first and deciding which parts your child is ready to hear, but for us it was right at DD's level of curiosity and understanding.</p>
 

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<p>We really like "<a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/redirect.html?ie=UTF8&linkCode=ur2&camp=1789&creative=9325&tag=motheringhud-20&location=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.amazon.com%2FIts-So-Amazing-Families-Library%2Fdp%2F0763613215%2Fref%3Dsr_1_1%3Fie%3DUTF8%26qid%3D1292642620%26sr%3D8-1" rel="norewrite" target="_blank">It's So Amazing!</a>" It's by the same author as "It's Not The Stork" but goes into a little more detail about how babies grow in the womb etc. When DD was younger, we had "<a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/redirect.html?ie=UTF8&linkCode=ur2&camp=1789&creative=9325&tag=motheringhud-20&location=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.amazon.com%2FAmazing-You-Getting-Smart-Private%2Fdp%2F0142410586%2Fref%3Dsr_1_4%3Fie%3DUTF8%26qid%3D1292642620%26sr%3D8-4" rel="norewrite" target="_blank">Amazing You!</a>" which is more about boy/girl differences but has a gentle, brief section about pregnancy and birth.</p>
 
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<p>Try It's so amazing! I brought it home for DH and I to look at when I first got pregnant, and even *we* learned things!!!</p>
 
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