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Need tantrum help

585 Views 1 Reply 2 Participants Last post by  Twocoolboys
DS is 14 months old. He is getting extremely demanding, throwing temper tantrums when he doesn't get what he wants (usually my food or drink). If I share with him, I spend more time feeding him than eating and most of my meals are on a limited timeline (I have to get back to work). I've tried giving him his own food at the same time, but even if it's the same thing, he doesn't want HIS food, he wants MY food. He also gets mad if we're talking on the phone and don't give it to him, or if we take away the remote. He has a remote with no batteries and an old cell phone to play with, but he just throws them away and tries again to grab ours. Today, I was trying to nurse him and eat at the same time. He kept popping off to cry for my food. I didn't want to give it to him because it was spicy, but I couldn't get him to stay latched. Eventually, he BIT me as hard as he could and screeched. I finally had to have DH take him and hold him while he screamed and I finished eating so I could get back to work.

We've tried distracting DS with toys and things, but he just throws them aside and continues to scream and kick. We've gotten into the bad habit of giving him food every time he throws a fit, usually a banana. He just crams the whole banana in his mouth (he can eat the whole thing in less than two minutes) and goes back to trying to get whatever it is he can't have.

I just don't know how to deal with a kid who refuses to be distracted. It's not possible for me to just wait until he's doing something else to eat - I have to get to work, plus he'd drop whatever he was doing to come after my food anyway. I can't even nurse him anymore without him trying to get at my food. How do I handle a tantrum without 1. rewarding him for his misbehavior and 2. spending all day calming him down?

Thanks for your help!
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Oh, we were so there not too long ago with my now almost 2 year old. The fascination with the remote has worn off, so not an issue for us anymore. But, at the time, we just put it out of reach and ignored his tantrums. The phone he still likes. And, I do give it to him to play with. He has a real phone that doesn't work anymore that he plays with as well. He used to have tantrums over the phone issue, but has grown out of that as well. He does still like to play with it though.

The food issue I think is the easiest one to solve - at least it was for us. I would just expect that he is going to eat with you off your plate. Work it into your meal time. Sit him on your lap (cover yourself in a towel or something if you are trying to stay clean for work) and feed him and you at the same time. Maybe try to give yourself an extra 10 minutes or so for meals if this makes it take longer for you.

I would really try not to give him food when he has a tantrum, but I know that is easier said than done sometimes.

Good luck!
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