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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
DS and his class were on the playground when he thought he had an accident in his pants. He went to the nurse's office. The nurse told him to go back to his class (unaccompanied), he did and there was no one there (his class had gone to Spanish and the teacher was in another room). So he went outside where he was found by another teacher. DS figured he left his class outside so that is where they must still be. The teacher's feeling was that he should have known to go back to the nurse's office. He was talked to by the teacher, the principal and the nurse because obviously it was a safety issue. However, I really feel the lapse of judgment rests with the adults. I don't think his behavior was outside of the norm for a five-year-old.

What do you think? There's not much I can do at this point except call the principal if I feel strongly enough about it (which I haven't processed enough yet).
 

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The fault definitely lies w/ administration. But now he knows if his class isn't there, go back to the office/nurse/wherever he came from.

I'd speak w/ the principal about it and make sure staff knows to talk to the kids. "If you get away from your class and we're not in the classroom, always go back to the office." Something like that.
 

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If it's such a serious safety issue maybe they should have walked him to the classroom.

My kid would probably do the same thing, even now at 6yo. Shoot, I would probably do it. It seems more logical to me. "Go to your classroom" to me means "join your class." So if the class isn't in the classroom, you look for them elsewhere.

Sounds like the school realized they let a 5yo wander around unsupervised and are trying to blame him for it.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by oceanbaby View Post
If it's such a serious safety issue maybe they should have walked him to the classroom.

My kid would probably do the same thing, even now at 6yo. Shoot, I would probably do it. It seems more logical to me. "Go to your classroom" to me means "join your class." So if the class isn't in the classroom, you look for them elsewhere.

Sounds like the school realized they let a 5yo wander around unsupervised and are trying to blame him for it.
IME five year olds walk around schools all the time unsupervised, going from one place to another. There aren't enough adults to accompany every child going from the office back to his/her classroom. In any case, children can have a certain level of independence, and coming and going from an office to a classroom is appropriate in my opinion and doesn't warrant an escort. I'd be fine with my 5 yo doing that if she went to school.


IMO this is no biggie. The child needs to know the protocol, ie if your class isn't in the room, come back to the office and we'll help you locate them, so don't go outside on your own.

Sounds to me like he made what seemed a sensible decision, and they are teaching him that he could have done things differently. It's not a question of blaming anyone, but of seeing that he didn't understand the protocol, and explaining it to him. I'd be far more concerned if the teachers hadn't been worried and hadn't spoken with him about it afterwards.
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Britishmum, it is my understanding from talking to my son and his teacher that he was told he made a "bad choice" and that he had misbehaved by not going back to the nurse's office. So in addition to making him understand the safety issue, they wanted him to know he did wrong. That is really where I take issue -- he didn't make a bad choice.

I am still uncomfortable with him walking unaccompanied so I will agree to disagree with you on that point.
 

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Since the school itself is calling it a safety issue, then they are the ones responsible for solving it. I get that 5yos have independence in school, but the school is either fine with him walking around or they aren't. It sounds like in this case they aren't, but are trying to make the 5yo responsible for making sure he's NOT walking around by himself. That's where I take issue with the school.
 

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Sounds like they messed up and are blaming him.

When I taught, we sent everyone places in pairs, inc. to the nurse. Maybe then it would be TWO lost children in this case, but somehow that seems better.

I'd probably tell the principal that I, too, am concerned about this safety issue-- that your DS was alone all that time!
 
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