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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Do you ever feel like you need to hang out here even though you don't have a specific question or topic to discuss?<br><br>
I've felt like that since Wednesday, when we got Max's official dx. School starts Monday and I guess I'm feeling some anxiety and a little sad for him. I want to be there and protect him and hold his hand and help him through each day and be a buffer between him and the rest of the world. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/gloomy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Gloomy">:<br><br>
My little boy is going into 2nd grade and he has a disorder/condition/whatever that makes him different from the rest. The rest, who will surely notice this difference. The rest, who will pick on him for it. The rest, who will tell their parents, "Max is weird" and the parents will think so, too. The rest, who do not know my boy and may not like my boy.<br><br>
He's not in class with anyone he knew from last year except the nosey little girl Nicole who is also a bit of a tattle tale.<br><br>
His friend Joel (also in our congregation) is in another room, Joshua, the other boy in his first grade class w/ autism, is in Joel's class. I don't know where his pal Marc is.<br><br>
He's alone.<br><br>
Is it me who feels alone and he's fine? Or does he see it, too?<br><br>
First day of school always scared me so much. I hated it because I never felt like I knew anyone. (My parents moved us often so I didn't get to stay in a school for more than a couple of years at a time.)<br><br>
I don't want my boy to pick up on my fear.<br><br>
Interestingly, I don't feel this way about my NT girl. I think she'll be fine. She liked Pre-K, she's looking forward to Kindergarten. She's going to be fine. She thinks and acts like the rest. Unique in her own way, very smart, but still NT. "Normal."
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"><br><br>
I know how you feel. I'm dreading next week. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad">
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>jaye</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/9000812"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"><br><br>
I know how you feel. I'm dreading next week. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"></div>
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We need a support group. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/redface.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Embarrassment"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/gloomy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Gloomy">:
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"> I think about what it will be like when ds is older, if he is mainstreamed out of his nice little autism bubble, his self-contained classroom, and it makes me feel panicked. I can't relate yet, but I understand. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"> we aren't facing school yet but yet I still identify with a lot of what you wrote. I'll be thinking of you Monday. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/hug2.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Hug2">
 

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We started school last monday... the first 2 days were very very tough..I am not going to lie... but then it seems to have gotten better.. everyday a lil better...and when I asked him if he wants to go to school tomorrow ...he got all excited and yelled yed.... So I think as long as he is excited and wants to go...I will keep sending him...<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> he is in a mainstream more at four program...
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
Max did well in First grade. He had a good teacher. His 2nd grade teacher seemed very nice, also. I hope she can deal with him as well as his 1st gr teacher did. He's mainstreamed. His doctor recommended Handwriting Without Tears for him and said he would probably be one who would end up using a computer in later years.<br><br>
Max makes his lower-case letter "a" backwards. Tail first, then he loops around the body and connects it. Cursive (not till 3rd grade, but I'm still worrying) is going to be difficult for him and I refuse to make his world any harder than it already is.<br><br>
When they had to write sentences last year (every Wed was sentence day) he would fight and struggle and procrastinate and everything else. His doc explained that it's uncomfortable for him. I didn't realize that. I also didn't realize that SPD affected his hands. I didn't realize he had it, actually, I guess. I guess I just thought, "Oh, he has some sensory issues. It comes with the Asperger's." It didn't register that it was a whole separate issue for him.<br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/dizzy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Dizzy">: <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/duck.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Duck">: <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/fever.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Fever">: <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/gloomy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Gloomy">: Max wanted those smilies. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol">
 

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I'm so afraid of this too. This is one of the reasons we have kept my ds out of school this year.<br><br><br>
I hope Max does well and he can find a friend or two.
 

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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Finch</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/9002534"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"> I think about what it will be like when ds is older, if he is mainstreamed out of his nice little autism bubble, his self-contained classroom, and it makes me feel panicked. I can't relate yet, but I understand. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"></div>
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Yeah, yeah! Panicked is a good word for it.
 

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Discussion Starter · #11 ·
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>williamsmommy2002</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/9006385"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I'm so afraid of this too. This is one of the reasons we have kept my ds out of school this year.<br><br><br>
I hope Max does well and he can find a friend or two.</div>
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Me too. I'm sure he will, I just hope it's a good friend and not one who will make fun of him w/ other kids but act like his friend when it's just Max.
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"><br><br>
Well, we don't have a dx yet for my 4-year-old dd, and maybe we won't even get one. We'll see. (First dev ped appt. is on Thursday.) But she's starting pre-k in September, and I know what you mean about your child being different, and you worry that he'll be known as the strange child and that nobody will like him. I have those same fears for dd. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad">
 

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JTG, at the bottom of the page here, there's a whole bunch of links about teasing and bullying.<br><br><a href="http://www.orgsites.com/md/asperger_syndrome_info/_pgg6.php3" target="_blank">http://www.orgsites.com/md/asperger_...nfo/_pgg6.php3</a><br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">
 

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Discussion Starter · #14 ·
<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>joensally</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/9008830"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">JTG, at the bottom of the page here, there's a whole bunch of links about teasing and bullying.<br><br><a href="http://www.orgsites.com/md/asperger_syndrome_info/_pgg6.php3" target="_blank">http://www.orgsites.com/md/asperger_...nfo/_pgg6.php3</a><br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"></div>
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Oh, that's great! Thank you. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile">
 

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<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Finch</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/9002534"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"> I think about what it will be like when ds is older, if he is mainstreamed out of his nice little autism bubble, his self-contained classroom, and it makes me feel panicked. I can't relate yet, but I understand. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"></div>
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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/yeahthat.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="yeah that">: <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">
 

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I know a woman at school whose child was doing really well and fully mainstreamed by 3rd grade - but by 5th grade he had asked to go back to NSH class because of some bullying but also because he just didn't feel like he could make friends. He's a great kid and he's one of the reasons that I'm not for full inclusion for every child.
 

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Discussion Starter · #17 ·
<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>jaye</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/9008941"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I know a woman at school whose child was doing really well and fully mainstreamed by 3rd grade - but by 5th grade he had asked to go back to NSH class because of some bullying but also because he just didn't feel like he could make friends. He's a great kid and he's one of the reasons that I'm not for full inclusion for every child.</div>
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Yeah, it doesn't work for everyone all the time. I guess we'll see how Max does this year. I wrote his teacher a letter (he'll bring it to school in the morning) letting her know that he has Asperger's & SPD and "he thinks differently." I hope he has a good year with her. She seemed to be good natured, liked kids, happy to be teaching. I got a good feeling.
 

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A sensitive teacher can make all the difference. And I do think inclusion can work (and be great!) for a lot of kids - the school just has to make sure to provide the right kind of support - for the whole class. That's where they usually fall short.
 

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<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>williamsmommy2002</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/9006385"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I'm so afraid of this too. This is one of the reasons we have kept my ds out of school this year.<br><br><br>
I hope Max does well and he can find a friend or two.</div>
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Ditto this. I hope Max does well!<br><br>
We chose not to send our DD to kindergarten this year. 20 hours pf preschool a week last year was too much for her. All I got at the end of a day was an exhausted, distraught, tantruming child. I just can't handle a 7.5 hour day for my 4 year old kindergartener (she turns 5 4 days before the state cutoff for K). Instead of being the youngest (complete with special needs), next year she'll be one of the oldest and will hopefully have better coping skills to deal with such a long, strenuous day. At least that's what I'm hoping for. The negative is that it gives me an extra year to become even more anxious and upset about it. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/gloomy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Gloomy">: I will truly need meds by the first day of school next year!<br><br>
I really feel for all of you!
 

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<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Justthatgirl</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/9005502"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Ma<br><br>
When they had to write sentences last year (every Wed was sentence day) he would fight and struggle and procrastinate and everything else. His doc explained that it's uncomfortable for him. I didn't realize that. I also didn't realize that SPD affected his hands. I didn't realize he had it, actually, I guess. I guess I just thought, "Oh, he has some sensory issues. It comes with the Asperger's." It didn't register that it was a whole separate issue for him.<br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/dizzy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Dizzy">: <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/duck.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Duck">: <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/fever.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Fever">: <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/gloomy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Gloomy">: Max wanted those smilies. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"></div>
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Have you asked the school about training to use an Alpha Smart? It's like a word processor w/o the screen? He may be a little young but it will help because he can do all his written work on it? We have one a school this year for Samantha.
 
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