new chat into december

hildare · Nov 27, 2011

sorry... didn't see the old thread and i really had to whine.
 
i spent thanksgiving in the emergency room! all is ok, i had a stomach bug that was pretty much the worst illness i've ever had. pretty much the anti-thanksgiving feast. they weren't even worried about the baby, though! they gave me zofran (?) and 1 iv bags of fluid.. and then several hours later discharged me then sent me up to maternity. words cannot describe how awful it was. plus, i ruined thanksgiving- dh and dd didn't get to go to their grannie's... 
 
but man... if i do get a vbac, there's no way labor can possibly be any worse than that business. i'm set.
 
and you guys? hope you all ate a bunch of stuff and enjoyed it. tell me about it???? vicarious yumminess details please.
 
(i guess another positive is that my weight gain is pretty much less than i anticipated after a week of broth. and un-food.)

parsley · Nov 27, 2011

Oh, Hildare! That is awful. Hope you are feeling better. Congrats on the weight management though <img alt="ROTFLMAO.gif" id="user_yui_3_4_1_7_1322428222741_166" src="http://files.mothering.com/images/smilies/ROTFLMAO.gif">
 
I had an exhausting, frustrating week of too much (ungrateful) family and DD acting bratty. We hosted T-giving and had house guests starting Weds morning through today. I'm tired, my house is a mess, and I can't stop making sarcastic comments at my 3 yo. I made the most amazing brussel sprouts roasted with apples and sage and cauliflower gratin though. 
 
I'm too tired to write more now.

TeamGR · Nov 27, 2011

Hildare! Happy to hear you are feeling better and hope things continue smoothly from here to Feb.... 
 
Parsley... brussel sprouts with apples sounds delicious!
 
I had an OK Thanksgiving, I'm alternating these days between terror and not looking forward to the baby because of fears of feeling alone and that my work like/ relationship with husband/ personality will disappear. I'm hoping I will continue to work through these issues as the date gets closer. 
 
However I definitely FEEL like I've entered a new phase of the pregnancy. Slowing down, back aches, joint stiffness, not able to move quickly or with grace. The belly is getting l-a-r-g-e and I have to lift it up to sit properly, which amuses my husband to no end. I'm just short of 28 weeks, so here we go third trimester!

jaimeemiaj · Nov 28, 2011

Hildare, How awful! I'm so glad you are feeling better now and out of the hospital. Maybe a re-do of Thanksgiving to get the feast you all deserve when you are feeling better?

FrannieM · Nov 28, 2011

I had a rough weekend too... I had a bad case of MASTITIS!! So unusual BEFORE the baby even comes. I am on antibiotics and it has definitely messed with my energy level and appetite... let alone led to a seriously painful rockhard boob.

atomicrocket · Nov 28, 2011

Hildare and FrannieM - sorry to hear about your crappy weekends! Hope you are both feeling better.
 
We had thanksgiving in October, so I didn't have to deal with any holiday stress this weekend. Instead I studied for my exam (which is tomorrow!!) and went shopping for a new coat. I actually grew out of the maternity jacket that I bought to last the whole winter (ha!) so I went and bought a huge coat that I will never grow out of. I'm going to try to make sure that for baby #2, I am pregnant in the winter again so I get more use out it.

Right of Passage · Nov 28, 2011

Oh Hildare that is awful! I had lots of pie, yummy pie! And sweet potatos, and green beans, and rolls, it was carb heaven! 
FrannieM I'm so sorry you're having to deal with mastitis already. 
And yes parsley you now have me craving brussel sprouts, yum!

1blueheron · Nov 28, 2011

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Good luck with your exam, atomicrocket! Let us know how it goes!
 
We had a lovely thanksgiving. DD came down with a tummy bug yesterday, but hey - at least she did not turn into a puke fountain on thanksgiving day, or while we were traveling. (Sorry, hildare - that must really have been terrible. Hope you get a do-over!)
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ozzyemm · Nov 28, 2011

Yikes, Hildare!! Glad it is over now, and you and the baby are fine. 
FrannieM-- mastitis BEFORE baby?? Are you breastfeeding currently? Dood that sucks

. I had mastitis ONCE in four years of breastfeeding M, and it sucked! I put cabbage on my boob and it really seemed to work.
 
 
This week was, interesting. We left last Saturday night for our family Thanksgiving in our hometown. We crashed Saturday night at 11pm. At 6am Sunday, we headed out to Disneyland. We spent a very WET day trying to enjoy the rides, etc. It was ok, and I tried really hard not to grouse about spending $300 to spend a day at the happiest place on earth. Oh, and we got stuck on "It's a Small World!" :lol That was awesome. 
 
Anyway, the rest of the week went ok. I learned that if I want to visit my family, DH's family will be amazed and confused, and it will disrupt plans, but MIL will pretend it doesn't. All will be fine, as long as I fit in my family in between all of DH's family's events :eyeroll. So frustrating. Normally, I don't see my family. We aren't close; my mom lives in a different state, and my brothers and I don't really get along. But, with being pregnant, I guess, I really wanted to visit MY family. Hubby is awesome, because he never argued with me, and made sure to remind in-laws of our plans

.
 
Also, MIL and FIL are supposed to come and help with the baby in Feb. Ummmmm.... SO not going to happen. Michael (who is 5) pissed off FIL (who is in his mid 60s). FIL is very passive, and will not say anything until you piss him off, and then he will explode. Anyway, I was trying to take a nap and DH had to run next door for a minute. I *knew* Michael should have gone with him, but I was trying to sleep, and didn't say anything. Apparently, Michael was messing with FIL's chair, and FIL said to stop. At some point FIL sits in his chair, and Michael gets mad and throws a pillow at him, making FIL's book fly in FIL's face. FIL flips out and says, "WHAT DID YOU DO?????? DO YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENED TO THE LAST KID WHO THREW A BOOK AT ME??? tHE POLICE CAME AND TOOK HIM TO JAIL!!!" Um, WTF? At that point I got up, grabbed Michael's hand and walked him next door, to DH. At that point I knew I couldn't have that man in my house with my newborn and my 5 (will be 6

) year old. He has yelled at him before, and hit him once (supposedly Michael hit FIL when FIL was asleep, and FIL hit him back in a "well, he hit me first!" way. In fact, he said those exact words). MIL also yelled at him because she couldn't hear him, and he was running an errand for me, and she misunderstood. 
 
I just can't deal with that postpartum. I am thinking about having them over for a short visit maybe two or three weeks after baby is born. They were going to be here for a month. I would go nuts, and FIL would go missing LOL. It would NOT be a good situation.

FrannieM · Nov 29, 2011

ozzyemm - eek that is some drama!
 
atomicrocket - how did your exam go?
 
My boob is better. My midwife was upbeat about it today, she said I am going to have lots of milk. I am just glad to not have a dark purple tata anymore! Finishing up my antibiotics, and starting up some probiotics!

hildare · Nov 29, 2011

frannie, mastitis is horrible.

glad it is better, good that you'll have lots of milk too! 
i think we're all craving those sprouts.... anything roasted with apples is so yummy.

parsley · Nov 29, 2011

OK. I have to rant a little bit. I am having the worst week. 
 
I had an u/s last Monday to check on my placenta. It hadn't moved AT ALL. I still have complete placenta previa. The tech recommended I come back at 36 weeks for another u/s. (Previa = c-section).
 
Three days before the u/s I decided to bite the bullet and ask my mom to come to stay for 2 weeks around my due date. She was thrilled and my father called me up to harass me about what date she should fly out and can't I rearrange things a little so they can get a cheaper flight, etc... when I suggested my mom needed a car for 2 weeks so she could actually be helpful my father complained about how demanding I am. I regretted the invitation instantly. 
 
All the more when I realized three days later that I really might be looking at another scheduled c-section. If it's scheduled, I have better care I can line up for DD and definitely DON"T need my mother around for two weeks making me crazy. 
 
My mother acted like a total a** throughout all of Thanksgiving weekend. She sulked when DD wanted to play with my sisters. She made a mess in the kitchen whenever I cleaned a counter to cook something. She didn't cook ANYTHING. She stayed 20 feet behind everyone at the zoo the whole next day taking pictures of us and refusing to actually interact. I said that what I most need for the baby is some warm clothes (mittens, hats, etc...). She went to Marshalls and bought clothes that I would NEVER put on a kid... even if they had 20 exploding poopy diapers in a single day.,, and they were short sleeves.
 
Anyway, they left, eventually. I thought I was recovering and now I have an ear infection. An ear infection? How does one even get an ear infection? How can you treat it? I'm clueless. All I know is that when DD had one, she was given anti-biotics. Well, guess what, I've been on antibiotics for a month straight to deal with my asymptomatic UTIs. I can not possibly go on more antibiotics. I already had to deal with the world's worst yeast infection. 
 
So, I remembered that breast milk is great for treating stuff... used it with pink eye and the like for myself and DD. I tried to get some for my ear. I don't have milk anymore. I have some colostrum but no milk. What is DD nursing on at this point?
 
That's a lot of complaining. I'm sorry for the rant... I'm just feeling very doomed at the moment. And, can I admit this? almost wishing my placenta won't move so I won't have to deal with my mother. (I really don't want another c... ). Thanks for letting me complain. 
 
Much more interesting, Atomicrocket, are you ABD now? Congrats!
 
Ozzyemm - sorry you had to deal with family drama too. Do you have alternate child care plans worked out for labor?
 
Frannie - glad your mastitis has cleared up. Can you spare any milk for my ear?

Right of Passage · Nov 29, 2011

Wow parsley that's a lot ((hugs))
 
For an ear infection I use garlic oil. Handful of whole garlic cloves, put in a pot with enough extra virgin olive oil to cover, simmer until they turn golden brown. Allow to cool. The I swab my ear with a cotton swab that's been dipped in the oil every couple hours. Clears it up.

hildare · Nov 29, 2011

parsley <img alt="tea6.gif" id="user_yui_3_4_1_7_1322592395604_169" src="http://files.mothering.com/images/smilies/tea6.gif">this is the closest smilie i could get to sending you good thoughts.
i imagine your chances of your placenta moving at this point are pretty low, they're going to want to schedule you early early aren't they?
the thing about the clothes totally reminds me of my mother. who is not invited to "help" after our birth. buying that stuff is EXACTLY what she would do, though. ugh. can you take them back? 
you don't need the stress involved with her... how hard is it going to be for you all if she didn't come? are your sisters closer and more reliable? can they help and swap out? it just briefly sounded like they stress you less. 
ita about the garlic ear oil. i don't find many home remedies work for me, but that one will.

ozzyemm · Nov 29, 2011

Ugh Parsley! Why must families suck sometimes??? I am not sure if I can find someone for after the baby comes, but I have two people who will watch Michael while I am in labor. One couple approached us and made sure we knew it was ok to drop him off at any time. That was nice

. They live twenty minutes out of town though, and I don't know that I want DH that far from me :shrug We will see.

atomicrocket · Nov 29, 2011

Parsley - I am really sorry to hear about your placenta previa, and the issues with your family. Maybe you can suggest she shorten the trip or have her come several weeks after the birth so you don't have to feel so stressed during the first few weeks with your new babe.
 
My exam went really well! <img alt="biggrinbounce.gif" id="user_yui_3_4_1_7_1322608717195_165" src="http://files.mothering.com/images/smilies/biggrinbounce.gif"> I had some tough questions but I was able to answer all of them and my committee was really impressed.
 
I am really happy and relieved, and really looking forward to just relaxing tonight. DP mentioned going out for a celebratory dinner together but I really just want to put on my pajamas and do nothing!

jaimeemiaj · Nov 30, 2011

Ozzyem- You are a more patient woman that I. I probally would have some Mamma Bear hormones come out and want to take down FIL. You deserve a brownie sunday for dealing with that drama.
 
Parsley- Hugs to you and hopes for a smooth visit in the future. I know how you feel, there are a lot of similarilties in our Mammas. Sometimes, the "help" can lead to more stress.

FrannieM · Nov 30, 2011

LOL, if I *could* darling, I would!!! You poor thing. Your mother sounds very unhelpful, but really WANTING to help. That is a super tough combination, (my mother can be similar). I try to remember her heart is in the best place. 
 
<div class="quote-container">Quote:
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by parsley <a href="/community/t/1337351/new-chat-into-december#post_16767187"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a> Frannie - glad your mastitis has cleared up. Can you spare any milk for my ear?

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parsley · Nov 30, 2011

Big congrats, Atomic Rocket!!!!
 
Thanks for all the hugs and good thoughts! Things are still feeling pretty bad around here but some of it should begin to improve...
 
We woke up to find out that the hot water heater had broken. So we had to shell out $800 for a new one + installation (which bugs me because installation is something I could handle with DH if I wasn't pregnant and awkward and afraid to lift things). 
 
My earache is worse. My jaw, neck, and ear are all swollen. So, I ended up going to urgent care and they said it's swimmers ear and they prescribed ear drops. 
 
And, I had an awful Midwife visit this morning. I felt like I was being prepared for having my care transferred bc of the previa (which is not something they do-- you remain a midwife patient except for the day of the surgery. They have a doc they work with closely in the adjacent practice who does the c and does vbac consults). She glibly mentioned that I'd probably be scheduled for a c-section at 36-38 weeks. I tried to ask questions but she just kept putting me off and telling me to ask the Dr. at my VBAC/C-section consult. I think it was just that this midwife had a poor bedside manner. Still, I was already stressed out and her negativity didn't help. At least DH was with me so he could confirm that the person we met was bad and comfort me for being a baby and bursting into tears during the visit. 
 
Anyway, my ear should start getting better soon. And, I should get to take a shower tomorrow before I teach. So, there's my silver lining

As for my mom, I just wish I hadn't said anything until I had a sense of what was happening with my placenta. If it's a scheduled c, then my sister (the one who lives near us) will take off work and another sister will spend her vacation at our house. DD adores both sisters and she'd have lots of attention and care. My mother is the only one I know without any work obligations so I was feeling like having her come out would guarantee child care no matter when I went into labor. But, Frannie, you are absolutely right. Part of the problem is that she DESPERATELY wants to help but she is totally unhelpful. She's just so incompetent and inefficient that I get frustrated and do things myself and then she gets defensive. It's a bad combination... my perfectionism and impatience with her spacy, laxadasical and casual "helping" style. Clearly I'm going to have to rescind my invitation, at least in part. But, it's going to break her heart. If I don't though, I'm not going to be able to mother my children (or myself) the way we will all need and feel good about. Ugh!
 
Thanks again for listening to all this. It does help to just vent and get it all out there. Hope you all are well.

hildare · Dec 1, 2011

how's your ear today parsley?
 
so... i just wanted to tell you all again, how cool it is that i'm doing a birth bead thing with my facebook buddies (which is the only way i ever see anybody anymore!) if you were considering it, DO IT! all i did was email my pals and tell them that i wanted a bead from each person to string for the birth--
they've been coming in with sweet notes, sentimental, wonderful & personal stories. it makes me giddy, it's better than holiday presents!
 
if you guys want to do one here, too.. i know some of the ddcs have a bead swap.. anybody down?

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