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<div>I'm in week 6 of EC with my little guy (10 weeks old), and I just wanted to post a little thing to encourage anyone who is thinking about trying it, but still on the fence. My husband and I sat down together when the baby was 4 weeks old and reflected on how this whole parenthood gig was going so far. Overall, we were enjoying it, but we were SO SICK of diapers. I felt like I spent my whole day just changing, washing, drying, and folding diapers. Especially in the newborn phase, when they pee every 15 minutes...it's a lot of diapers. We had heard of EC--we knew one family that had successfully done it with their son, and I had read _Diaper Free_ during my pregnancy (interestingly, I read it while we were housebreaking our puppy--the methods are basically identical--look for signs, teach a cue, pay attention to timing, don't make a big deal out of "accidents"). We weren't sure about it--in those first few weeks of parenthood, there was just so much to learn, between breastfeeding and surviving on basically no sleep and dealing with my parents, who just would NOT GO HOME (first grandbaby on both sides...). EC seemed like too much to handle on top of all that. Well, at week 4, we decided that we didn't have anything to lose--except for some of our diaper laundry. So, I spent a few days with the baby just wearing a prefold (no cover). I kept a waterproof pad under him and commited to really paying attention to what he was doing. It only took a few hours before I figured out his sign--a particular kind of leg kicking (we had previously called this "the diaper dance"), and also what we call "nursing like a jerkface"--not settling down, popping on and off, biting. I showed my husband when he got home. After three days, we were SOLD on EC. We can't believe other people don't do this! He still wears a prefold and often a cover, but sometimes he'll wear the same prefold for 10 hours before we have a miss. We use a BBLP with a cozy that I made, or sometimes we hold him over the toilet (or sit double with him on a bigger toilet). </div>
<div> </div>
<div>Here are a few things EC has helped us with:</div>
<div>1) Mystery fusses. You know when your baby isn't wet, cold, or hungry, but he's just being a crankypants? Turns out, at least for our baby, nine times out of ten, he's working on a poop. Once that poop happens, he's ok again. We've discovered that, at night, he won't go to sleep until he's had his "big poop." Generally, he fusses wayyy less when we're doing consistent EC.</div>
<div>2) Figuring out food sensitivities. He's mostly a pretty happy baby, but we would have these nights when he would just scream and scream and all of us would be totally exhausted and crying before he finally went down. We would literally spend six hours trying to get the kid to sleep...but other nights he'd be just fine. EC helped us finally put it together. Besides screaming and being super wired, he was peeing literally every 10 minutes. I said, "It's like someone gave him a diuretic....oh crap, it's the coffee!" I don't drink coffee much--I don't make it for myself at home unless I have company. I was able to look back at the nights when he was a little changling baby and sure enough, they were all days when I had had coffee in the morning. Dr. Google says that babies shouldn't be sensitive to the caffeine in just one cup of coffee, but he definitely is. If he had just been filling a sposie, I would never have caught on.</div>
<div>3) Amazing our friends. Seriously. This might sound crazy, but I think the baby knows when there is a skeptic watching, because at those times, he goes IMMEDIATELY on cue and looks totally self-satisfied. My MIL about fell over when she saw this little baby use the potty. I think she thought that we basically just had him on the potty 24/7 and waited for something to happen.</div>
<div>4) Connecting with our baby. I know it's kind of a weird thing to connect over, but it feels so good to be able to see that he has a need and fill it, rather than just feeling helpless and saying, "I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU WANT."</div>
<div>5) LAUNDRY. Wow. I used to do diaper laundry literally every day. Now it's more like...every three days or so. And not always because I'm out of diapers, but because they're starting to smell.</div>
<div> </div>
<div>Caveats and warnings:</div>
<div>1) Here's the big one: at least in our case, when you teach your kid that there is a better way than sitting in his own poo, he won't want to go back. Even in situations where you JUST CAN'T get him to the bathroom (8 lanes of traffic on the DC beltway, anyone?). He will get REALLY MAD about this.</div>
<div>2) People will accuse you of abusing your child, or will ask if this will mess him up sexually as an adult. Know your research; be ready to respond. (short version: It's not EARLY pottying that is bad, it's COERCIVE pottying. And also, Freud was on enough cocaine to kill a small horse.). Anyone who actually witnesses you and your kid communicate and sees him pee on the potty shortly after you've placed him there will see that it's not mean. And, yes, it is "mom who is potty trained." Watch any parent trying to potty-train their two-year-old, and you'll see that they're doing the same thing--watching for "the potty dance," taking their kid to the potty, pulling the pants down. The difference is that those kids get a sticker on their bribe chart, and my poor little guy doesn't know what a sticker is.</div>
<div> </div>
<div>Tips and pointers:</div>
<div>1) Public bathrooms...oy. The normal kind, with a row of stalls, are the worst. There's just no where to set things down, undress the baby, potty him, put it all back together. Even in the ones with a changing table... you kind of leave your diaper stuff out there and carry a bare-butt baby back and forth from a stall. The looks you get are priceless. The best restrooms are either the one-seaters, where you have the whole room to yourself, or the kind with the fold-out changing table in the handicapped stall. Depending on the bathroom situation, sometimes I don't even try.</div>
<div>2) Little babies take a LONG time to poop. Sometimes they act like it is painful (maybe it is?). It's not the same as a refusal, though. You just have to be willing to sit there and wait a while and let him fuss. One night, my husband and I realized that we had planned out our whole Christmas gift list for all eleven brothers and sisters and in-laws while our son sat on his potty, tooting away. I was just about to give up when I finally heard the big poop. Pees usually are pretty quick--if he hasn't peed within 2 or 3 minutes of being on the potty, he doesn't need to. Poops, though, he can work on for up to 20 minutes. He rocks back and forth, jiggles his leg, and looks like he is concentrating REALLY HARD. Sometimes he fusses really intensely, but it gets worse if I interrupt him and take him off the potty. Unless I get a strong refusal (legs straight out AND an arched back), I let him work on it. Just make sure you're comfortable and have a good book or podcast or something.</div>
<div>3) He's only 2 months old...his signals aren't very clear all the time. Sometimes, it looks like he's signalling, when really, he's just wiggling or flailing. He doesn't have strong volitional movements yet, although that's getting better. I think it will get easier when he's older.</div>
<div>4) Get over your fear of getting peed on. Everyone has it. The sooner you conquer it, the easier it will be. Your clothes are washable. Baby pee is pretty innocuous. </div>
<div>5) Most people actually think it's pretty cool and amazing. I was shy about telling people about EC for the longest time, but most of the people I've told have said, "That's actually really smart. Wow."</div>
<div>6) This might depend on the baby, but our kid seems to signal a good while before it becomes an emergency. We can take our time getting him all undone and unsnapped and it's still fine. When he's bigger, I'll probably make him some split-crotch pants, but for right now, it's not a big deal.</div>
<div>7) If I make sure to offer him the potty at least twice when I get up to nurse him at night (once right when I get up, and once when we switch sides), he goes back to sleep with his bladder mostly empty and will stay down for 3 hours at a stretch. If I don't, he wakes me up again an hour later!</div>
<div>8) When you change a diaper, offer the potty. I know this sounds counterintuitive, since he just went, but haven't you had the experience of having to change three diapers in 20 minutes? Me too. EC can help!</div>
<div>9) If you're using a potty, make or buy a cozy. That little seat gets COLD!</div>
<div> </div>
<div>So that's all I wanted to say--just some words of encouragement. You just have to jump in and try it. Your baby will thank you.</div>
 
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Thanks Nilatti, great post and very inspiring!
 

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<p>Love this Love Letter. I feel the same way : )</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"I don't know why more  people don't do this!"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>and </p>
<p> </p>
<p>It really does amaze people. Opens up a whole new world to some!</p>
<p>It amazes me and has changed my world.</p>
 

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<p><br>
Great posts!  I'm going to stick my reply in blue within your post b/c I can't figure out how to break up the quoted post in this new format, lol.</p>
<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>nilatti</strong> <a href="/community/forum/thread/1280257/new-mom-s-love-letter-to-ec#post_16055745"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a><br><br><p> </p>
<p>And, yes, it is "mom who is potty trained." Watch any parent trying to potty-train their two-year-old, and you'll see that they're doing the same thing--watching for "the potty dance," taking their kid to the potty, pulling the pants down. The difference is that those kids get a sticker on their bribe chart, and my poor little guy doesn't know what a sticker is.</p>
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<p><span style="color:rgb(0,0,205);">I started ECing with DS when he was 6 weeks old, and my family thought the whole thing was weird, and they were skeptical, etc.  They now are "believers" lol, but they still think it's weird.  On my last visit home, DS was about 10 months old, and I'd take him potty pretty frequently, even while we were out running errands and stuff.  And I asked them, "When will it stop being weird?  When he's 18 months?  When he's 2?  Those are "normal" potty-learning ages but a good portion of those kids still need help going to the bathroom.  All I'm doing is helping DS just the same way."  They didn't have an answer, but later told me that it would be "weird" to them until he started walking.  LOL.</span></p>
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<p>Little babies take a LONG time to poop.</p>
<p> </p>
<p><span style="color:rgb(0,0,205);">This depends on the baby.  Even as a newborn, my DS was a fast pooper, lol.</span></p>
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<p>When you change a diaper, offer the potty. I know this sounds counterintuitive, since he just went, but haven't you had the experience of having to change three diapers in 20 minutes? Me too. EC can help!</p>
<p> </p>
<p><span style="color:rgb(0,0,205);">Yes, a huge ditto!  Especially when they are older.  DS is 13 months old now and I STILL can't read the kid's signals, so I take him just every so often, and he usually holds it since he knows another pottytunity will be right around the corner.  But if I don't take him in time, he will often just START to go in his diaper, then realize that, oh, wait, I'm not on a potty, and stop.  Then he'll be fussing about the wet diaper and I'll change him and offer the potty, where he'll finish what he started.  He does the same thing for poops, too.  Sometimes I'll find just a little pea-sized amount in his diaper.  That is just his "warning poop" lol.  </span></p>
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Ok I just had to reply! I "discovered" EC entirely by accident when DS2 had a horrible diaper rash from week 2 to week 4 of his life. I mean, I had heard of it but had typical misconceptions that it was about a hovering parent and would be impossible if you were not w your baby all the time. Well, we taught each other how to poop in the potty! I totally agree w everything you wrote and thank you! I've been hesitant to do it for pee too but am feeling more motivated! I have some novice questions though.<br><br>
Does the pee consolidate just like the poo does?<br><br>
Do you potty in same room that you nurse at night?<br><br>
I have only really used sposies so prob need to switch to cloth if I am to be serious about this. What kind do people recommend?<br><br>
What is the best way to wipe a 9 week old? I always feel our positioning is awkward or else I can't see what I am doing.<br><br>
Is the BBLP the best potty for this age?
 

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<p>I'm not the OP but I can answer some of these questions.<br><br>
 </p>
<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>porcelina</strong> <a href="/community/forum/thread/1280257/new-mom-s-love-letter-to-ec#post_16073562"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border-right:0px solid;border-top:0px solid;border-left:0px solid;border-bottom:0px solid;"></a><br><br>
Ok I just had to reply! I "discovered" EC entirely by accident when DS2 had a horrible diaper rash from week 2 to week 4 of his life. I mean, I had heard of it but had typical misconceptions that it was about a hovering parent and would be impossible if you were not w your baby all the time. Well, we taught each other how to poop in the potty! I totally agree w everything you wrote and thank you! I've been hesitant to do it for pee too but am feeling more motivated! I have some novice questions though.<br><br>
Does the pee consolidate just like the poo does?<br><br>
Do you potty in same room that you nurse at night?<br><br>
I have only really used sposies so prob need to switch to cloth if I am to be serious about this. What kind do people recommend?</div>
<div class="quote-block"><span style="color:#0000ff;">We used sposies and had no problems.</span><br><br>
What is the best way to wipe a 9 week old? I always feel our positioning is awkward or else I can't see what I am doing.<br><span style="color:#0000ff;">After dd pottied, I would just lay her on the floor, hold her legs in the air and wipe her bottom like I would if I was changing her diaper.</span><span style="color:#0000FF;"> Then as she got older, I would ask her to touch her toes so I could wipe.</span></div>
<div class="quote-block"><br>
Is the BBLP the best potty for this age?</div>
</div>
<p><br><br>
To the Op,</p>
<p>I have found this portable potty <a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/redirect.html?ie=UTF8&linkCode=ur2&camp=1789&creative=9325&tag=motheringhud-20&location=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.amazon.com%2FKalencom-POTETTE-Go-Potty-Red%2Fdp%2FB00069BV8A%2Fref%3Dsr_1_3%3Fie%3DUTF8%26qid%3D1290739432%26sr%3D8-3" rel="norewrite" target="_blank">http://www.amazon.com/Kalencom-POTETTE-Go-Potty-Red/dp/B00069BV8A/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1290739432&sr=8-3</a> extremely helpful. We can avoid the public bathrooms by setting it up in the floor of the car or the back of the van.</p>
 

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<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>porcelina</strong> <a href="/community/forum/thread/1280257/new-mom-s-love-letter-to-ec#post_16073562"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a><br><br>
Ok I just had to reply! I "discovered" EC entirely by accident when DS2 had a horrible diaper rash from week 2 to week 4 of his life. I mean, I had heard of it but had typical misconceptions that it was about a hovering parent and would be impossible if you were not w your baby all the time. Well, we taught each other how to poop in the potty! I totally agree w everything you wrote and thank you! I've been hesitant to do it for pee too but am feeling more motivated! I have some novice questions though.<br><br>
Does the pee consolidate just like the poo does?</div>
<div class="quote-block"><span style="color:rgb(0,128,0);">I'm not quite sure what you mean---he tends to get it all out in one go, and then he's done for quite a while.</span><br><br>
Do you potty in same room that you nurse at night?</div>
<div class="quote-block"><span style="color:rgb(0,128,0);">Yep--the BBLP slides perfectly under his changing table, so I don't accidentally kick it at night! We all sleep, night-nurse, and potty in the same room. </span><br><br>
I have only really used sposies so prob need to switch to cloth if I am to be serious about this. What kind do people recommend?</div>
<div class="quote-block"><span style="color:rgb(0,128,0);">I don't have much to add here, but I should note that the sposies with velcro-ish (and therefore resealable) tabs are fine for EC. You just don't toss them if the baby didn't dirty them. Maybe all sposies are like this now, I don't know. For cloth, we like fuzzbunz one-size.</span></div>
<div class="quote-block"><br>
What is the best way to wipe a 9 week old? I always feel our positioning is awkward or else I can't see what I am doing.</div>
<div class="quote-block"><span style="color:rgb(0,128,0);">I usually set him down on a towel or changing table when he's done and wipe just like I'm doing a diaper change.</span><br><br>
Is the BBLP the best potty for this age?</div>
<div class="quote-block"><span style="color:rgb(0,128,0);">I don't know if it's the best. It's the only one we tried, and it seems to work. We've been using it since about 6 weeks.</span></div>
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<p>Yes, by consolidate, I mean that we went from DS2 having maybe 7-13 little and big poops per day to only 2-3 sittings per day, with several poops per sitting. If it is going to come out, a lot comes out, whereas with the diapers, he would have little tiny poops that we'd have to clean all the time -- like it was just leaking out.</p>
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<p>We just got a case of diaper rash again due to one miss! I don't think the poop was on his bottom more than 10 mins, but that was enough. EC is really the only way to go with a baby with skin this sensitive!</p>
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<p>I am still curious about the wiping -- I know it's easy when you're by your potty to stick them on the changing table, but what about public restrooms?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Thanks to everyone for responding!</p>
 

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<p>After pottying at home or in public we hold DS over the sink with one hand and wash his bottom with the other. This has worked great for our summer babe, who also seemed to "leak" poop in the first months and get rashy from it in the heat. We keep a small towel in the bathroom and the diaper bag and pat him dry and then air dry if appropriate. After pottying I just tip him into the crook of my right arm and grab onto his thigh to protect against spastic lurches.</p>
 

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<p>Here in NYC there is rarely a changing table in a public bathroom, and we don't really have enough room in our home for a changing table in a convenient location, I got accustomed to laying my son across my legs on his belly to wipe (although this was rarely needed, he started out quite young to wait til home to poop!) although for a girl I assume there's more wiping needed. Since he was old enough, my son started doing the yoga pose "Downward Dog" for wipes when needed.  Funny enough, when he was really little and still had poop misses if he was wearing a diaper or training pant my husband and I were so bewildered about the cleanup that we gave our son a bath every time! <br>
 </p>
<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>porcelina</strong> <a href="/community/forum/thread/1280257/new-mom-s-love-letter-to-ec#post_16078133"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a><br><br><br><p>I am still curious about the wiping -- I know it's easy when you're by your potty to stick them on the changing table, but what about public restrooms?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Thanks to everyone for responding!</p>
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<p>Okay, this is BIZARRE, because I just logged on specifically to post my own Love Letter to EC (literally I was thinking of titling the post that too).  How cool that you've already written most of what I was going to say!  I did this with dd1 from 3 months on and loved it.  THANK GOODNESS too, because she is a strong willed girly, and if I had tried to <em>start</em> potty training her at 2, I'm not convinced she'd be done today (she's 4).  As it was, she was totally taking herself to the potty reliably at 2 years 3 months.  Now if I could just get her to wipe herself on her own after pooping...</p>
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<p>With this new little dd, it's just so awesome to be starting right away.  She's only 2 months old and last night slept for 8 hours straight and woke up with a dry diaper (I *do* realize that part of this is her mellow personality...dd1 didn't sleep 8 hours straight until she was 2 YEARS old...).  This isn't the norm even for us, but it isn't unheard of either.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She sleeps better after peeing/pooping</p>
<p>It takes care of the fussing for "no" reason 90% of the time</p>
<p>I have less laundry</p>
<p>When she poops/pees she gets it all out instead of doing tiny pees/poops through the day</p>
<p>It's downright *cool*</p>
<p>and it makes her so happy and comfortable, etc, etc...</p>
<p> </p>
<p>I guess I'm just feeling newly enamored with it since it's already made such a difference for her--she already *gets* it so well!--even though she's only 2 months old, younger than my dd1 was when we first started.  I look back on dd1's earliest months and realize that many times she was trying to tell me she needed to pee, and I just didn't understand.  The very first time I offered the potty to dd1 when she was 3 months old, I held her over the potty and she craned around to look at me with a huge smile on her face.  I remember thinking that it looked like she was saying "finally mom!"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Anyway, HOORAY FOR EC!  I feel very grateful today that I found out about it at the right time.</p>
 
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