My son was diagnosed this year in 4th grade. We are so happy to have a diagnosis! He is on meds because this was affecting his learning and his behavoir. When I was trying to decide what to do people asked me if I would get him glasses if he needed it. I said yes of course. They said then it's no different. My friend explained it to me as having a brain that is constantly changing the channels and how frustrating must that be? I'm not here to try to sway you just sharing my experience. There's no right or wrong answer here only what is right for your family. As to the schools that's a hard decision. Mine go to a magnet school which is about 4 miles away but is like your charter school. It makes it harder to have playdates with kids at his school. But my kids are happy and have kids in our neighborhood. We are just hoping he will do ok there for 5th grade. It's a struggle somedays just being a parent.