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Try using one leg in, one out.... that's often a nice transitional position until she's comfy with legs out.
As far as when to do legs out, there's no hard and fast rule. Just try it occasionally, and see if she complains. (Sorry, non-helpful, I know.)
Also, make sure that you are positioning her with good back support in the mei tai. The may be slouched down too much in the carrier. This is a great article on newborn positioning in various baby carriers (the mei tai section is about halfway through): http://www.thebabywearer.com/article...ositioning.pdf
As far as when to do legs out, there's no hard and fast rule. Just try it occasionally, and see if she complains. (Sorry, non-helpful, I know.)
Also, make sure that you are positioning her with good back support in the mei tai. The may be slouched down too much in the carrier. This is a great article on newborn positioning in various baby carriers (the mei tai section is about halfway through): http://www.thebabywearer.com/article...ositioning.pdf