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Hi I'm new to the single parent thing. My Dh just moved out about a week and a half ago and left me with our 3 girls (9,4,& 1). My oldest dd is from my first marriage (I was a single mom to her for about 3 years). But being a single mom to 3 kids is a very different ball game than just 1.<br>
He said that he's not sure if he's coming back or when but at this point, I'm just assuming he's not. We're both 28 and he just wants to go out with his friends. He's more into their single lives than our family right now. So I'm left here to be the responsible parent while he's out doing as he pleases.<br>
It's just so hard right now. I miss him terribly but am also very resentful that I'm here with the 3 girls alone while he has all the free time in the world. He does come by a few times a week to see them but he mostly just sits on the couch while they are playing outside, definately not quality time.<br>
I just wish I could get passed this and get on with my life. I'm tired of being so depressed about everything.<br>
Any suggestions on picking myself up and getting my crap together are very welcome! I hate feeling so helpless and in a situation I can't control.
 

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Hi Girlzmommy:<br><br>
Though a week-and-one half is not very much time, you should consider what you need moving forward with or without your husband. One way I have dealt with my STB-x's stalling, procrastination and hem-and-hawing was to do stuff myself to move the situation along. A lot of things I do via phone or e-mail which may make sense for you too because your girls need your supervision. For example, I just got off the phone with a mortgage broker to see what my options are for refinancing our jointly owned home. When the broker gets back to me with something on paper, I'll stick it under STB-x's nose and say OK, what do you want to do now. It sort of forces him to be an adult and handle his responsibilities (at least partially). I also find it theraputic to stay busy.<br><br>
I hope things turn out OK for you.
 

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I finally just started looking at my life without him as a gift and privilage. My girls and I are a circle of love, and being resentful for that was just counterproductive. We really don't need him. I just try to make our lives as warm and as sweet and dear as I can and be thankful for how rich and full it is. I am low on sleep and money and time, but rich in hugs and kisses and cuddles and LOVE.<br><br>
Take care of the mamma. You have got a lot on your shoulders right now. You will get through this. Your family will thrive. Sometimes that negative energy kind of leaves a vaccum, but it will soon fill with activity and love and life and fun and work. Just take one day, heck, sometimes one minute at a time, and make the choice to do it with as much love and grace as you can. And you and your girls will have a wonderful life...
 
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