I don't have my own child (sibling that is lol) - yet!...But I have some experience with this as I childmind a child who is one years old in our own home (my son is four).<br><br>
Some ideas I have for you might be:<br><br>
If its a toy they are playing with that can get seriously interrupted by small child (like, a puzzle or train track or marble run, etc) - set up a place for them that they can play with it without being interrupted and/or go somewhere else with small child. You don't need to be in eachothers arms all day long - my son is pretty independent so he can play quite happy by himself. I realise this might be a problem for some children but mums are not superwoman - we can't do it all, all the time. Explain/stress to them that if they really want to play with said toy with no interruptions, then you really <i>will</i> have to go somewhere else with small child. If its really important to them, then they will be happy for some time alone.<br><br>
Make a box or a shelf or a corner or the top bunk bed or wherever - that small child can not reach - that special imprortant, really 'theirs' toys that they have can be put to stay safe. This may require a few conversations about things that are not exclusively 'theirs' but the families as a whole - but I find this idea can lessen the load. They can be quite happy with that small box set aside that only they can access themselves - meaning they start to care less about the rest of it that isn't in the box and/or can't fit in the box.<br><br>
Babies can be pretty non-existant to small child at first. Okay, they take up some of mummys time but we can get through this...then all of a sudden they become mobile - and they are no longer just taking up mummys time, they are taking up your entire life!...Imagine how you would feel if your husband brought home another wife and expected you to share the house, the chores, your clothes, your toys, etc with her. How would that make you feel?!... So try and <i>validate your DDs feelings</i>. It can really help her to know that you understand how she feels. It may also help her to know that you have unconditional love for her no matter what - so that she can better express herself and her feelings to you in an appropriate way (you may need to suggest ideas about this with her). Its nice to know that someone is listening and that somone does care and is trying to understand you - even to a toddler.<br><br>
Signs! - Make signs! This might sound like a silly idea but I have found them very helpful. Set aside some time where you two can have some one on one time - and make a sign together. To fit your situation of course. You could make a 'No pushing - Gentle touches' sign - with pictures of nice things like kisses and cuddles and other signs of gentle touching. Put it up on the wall in a family area. Its a nice reminder - and your DD helped to make it to so such reminders stick better! (we have a 'quiet time' sign we made for the evening - its fabulous! lol My son is so proud of the sign he made and puts it on the wall himself - with blue tac lol - every evening! Now everyones needs are respected in the evening - his need to stay up and not go to bed until we do, and our need for some peace and relaxation! lol)... You could even make an 'Ours' sign or something - where you can put that include toys your DD would like to share with her brother. So perhaps your children can each have a box? That way you can perhaps honour eachothers spaces.