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We have formed a habit which includes meals in bed once or twice a night. The reason I'm not just riding it out is because I don't think this is something she came to on her own I think this is something WE created.
OK the begining. Kiana is now almost three and 22 lbs. Me and her father are both small lean people, so I'm not very concerned with her slow growth compared to the chunky formula and junk food toddlers around here. But I have learnt alot about breastfeeding since she was small and know that I could have done better(Thankyou womanly art of breastfeeding!). But I will admit that sometimes I wonder if our choices to be healthy has affected her growth, instead of our chioce to make sure she is gaining well,normal mom doubting I figure...
We breastfed exclusively till she was 8 months when solids began at her own pace of self feeding. We co slept for almost the first year and stopped breastfeeding at about that time too for the (selfish it seems now)sake of my sanity. She also moved into her own crib in her own room which went rather well.
We switched over to bottles for about a year(stopped at 2), mostly just at nap and bed time and once during the night.
Like most todlers there are days she eats great and others when she just isn't as hungry and I believe in letting her feed her level of hungry on demand. But we live rurally and every few weeks we make pretty much a day trip into town. I do my best to encourage her to eat well, pack snacks and meals, take the time to sit down and eat, as well as pit stops for her to unwind and play, but somedays she just doesn't eat much. we always return home by supper and all sit down to eat togather and then unwind till bed time. It started out as her not going to sleep even after a long day of being out and about, not exactly overtired, just very willfull about needing our attention which we give her to a point becasue she can not fall asleep with us in her room anymore. We try to make sure that something obviouse isn't wrong and go through the list of possibilities.
Sometimes she would ask to eat so we would get her a good yet bland snack to fill her hunger but not to encourage the behavior. As we noticed patterns we would go in and ask her on theses busy days if she is hungry. Sometimes after her bed time snack she falls asleep other times she doesn't. Sometimes this would take place at 3-6am at which time I can completely understand her being hungry if she was because I usually am, lol.
Now we are having episodes. Days she won't eat much, then doesn't eat her snack before bed no matter how many time we warn her. And yes she does understand the concept, it doesn't just seem that way. She also knows that she can't play the card right away, because I don't usually give in unless she has been "going to bed" for a while and may be legitamately hungry. I've offered he the bland snacks and even her left over dinner or snack. Sometimes she eats it, and other times she doesn't, then other times it turns into a game of throwing it out the crib then calling us to retrieve it. It's gotten to the point where I actually buy nighttime snacks like fruit bars and she gets on most every night when she goes to bed and alot of times in the early morning. And now it seems like bed time is a battle again every night.
At first I thought that this was just a stage, where she needed the attention, and was actually hungry, but now as she talks more and we are learning just how smart she is, including how she is using this night time feeding crutch to manipulate us during the day as to what she eats. Plus she is sneakily pitting me and DH against eachother, lol because neither of us knows what to do or how to get on the same page and she is milking it for all it's worth to the point where she will stay up just to eat and end up stuffing herself continuously for hours so she doesn't have to go to bed.
If anybody can help us get through this the gentalist way possible while still understanding that we have a child that NEEDS structure, firmness, and consistancy, and NEEDS to know that we will follow through with what we say(otherwise EVERYTHING falls apart) to make her happy. I hate to come across as straying from the natural aspect of parenting and expecting to much of a toddler(which if you met her you would see we don't) but I do need to find a balance where we can meet her real NEEDS, and get back on track after letting our lazyness get this situation out of control.
OK the begining. Kiana is now almost three and 22 lbs. Me and her father are both small lean people, so I'm not very concerned with her slow growth compared to the chunky formula and junk food toddlers around here. But I have learnt alot about breastfeeding since she was small and know that I could have done better(Thankyou womanly art of breastfeeding!). But I will admit that sometimes I wonder if our choices to be healthy has affected her growth, instead of our chioce to make sure she is gaining well,normal mom doubting I figure...
We breastfed exclusively till she was 8 months when solids began at her own pace of self feeding. We co slept for almost the first year and stopped breastfeeding at about that time too for the (selfish it seems now)sake of my sanity. She also moved into her own crib in her own room which went rather well.
We switched over to bottles for about a year(stopped at 2), mostly just at nap and bed time and once during the night.
Like most todlers there are days she eats great and others when she just isn't as hungry and I believe in letting her feed her level of hungry on demand. But we live rurally and every few weeks we make pretty much a day trip into town. I do my best to encourage her to eat well, pack snacks and meals, take the time to sit down and eat, as well as pit stops for her to unwind and play, but somedays she just doesn't eat much. we always return home by supper and all sit down to eat togather and then unwind till bed time. It started out as her not going to sleep even after a long day of being out and about, not exactly overtired, just very willfull about needing our attention which we give her to a point becasue she can not fall asleep with us in her room anymore. We try to make sure that something obviouse isn't wrong and go through the list of possibilities.
Sometimes she would ask to eat so we would get her a good yet bland snack to fill her hunger but not to encourage the behavior. As we noticed patterns we would go in and ask her on theses busy days if she is hungry. Sometimes after her bed time snack she falls asleep other times she doesn't. Sometimes this would take place at 3-6am at which time I can completely understand her being hungry if she was because I usually am, lol.
Now we are having episodes. Days she won't eat much, then doesn't eat her snack before bed no matter how many time we warn her. And yes she does understand the concept, it doesn't just seem that way. She also knows that she can't play the card right away, because I don't usually give in unless she has been "going to bed" for a while and may be legitamately hungry. I've offered he the bland snacks and even her left over dinner or snack. Sometimes she eats it, and other times she doesn't, then other times it turns into a game of throwing it out the crib then calling us to retrieve it. It's gotten to the point where I actually buy nighttime snacks like fruit bars and she gets on most every night when she goes to bed and alot of times in the early morning. And now it seems like bed time is a battle again every night.
At first I thought that this was just a stage, where she needed the attention, and was actually hungry, but now as she talks more and we are learning just how smart she is, including how she is using this night time feeding crutch to manipulate us during the day as to what she eats. Plus she is sneakily pitting me and DH against eachother, lol because neither of us knows what to do or how to get on the same page and she is milking it for all it's worth to the point where she will stay up just to eat and end up stuffing herself continuously for hours so she doesn't have to go to bed.
If anybody can help us get through this the gentalist way possible while still understanding that we have a child that NEEDS structure, firmness, and consistancy, and NEEDS to know that we will follow through with what we say(otherwise EVERYTHING falls apart) to make her happy. I hate to come across as straying from the natural aspect of parenting and expecting to much of a toddler(which if you met her you would see we don't) but I do need to find a balance where we can meet her real NEEDS, and get back on track after letting our lazyness get this situation out of control.
