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night leask...leaks leaks and more leaks!!

777 Views 14 Replies 11 Participants Last post by  Taosmama
Not long ago, I could rattle off any number of nighttime solutions for a mama who couldn't find a night diaper. Now, I'm in despair! We're taking a little trip to BRU tomorrow to get potty learning "supplies" like a book and video.. and I think we'll end up with a package of disposables for nighttime too. Last night, my baby wore a trifold that made 6 layers of hemp fleece and three layers of hemp jersey, a three layer hemp fleece contour, a 9 layer hemp jersey trifold inside a darling fitted body. That's 11 layers of hemp fleece and 12 layers of hemp jersey through the wet-zone. It was EXTREMELY big and bulky. Cover that with an ME airflow, and what do you get? A diaper that is so wet, it is LITERALLY dripping/squishing out urine. How can this be? She is 20 months and still has a 6 oz bottle before bed, and 2 or 3 8oz bottles in the middle of the night. But still.. I just don't get it. That diaper was wet through every itsy bitsy fiber. There is just absolutly no way to put more layers on her. As it is, she can just barely sit up or move without help and I know she isn't comfortable.
All hemp was well broken in, and I know we don't have build up because I just recently stripped diapers and we don't have a skunk smell at all.
My only other option is to change her in the middle of the night.. maybe more than once.. but geez! This has been a leaky couple of weeks for us. About a week ago, I put her into the huggies we got in the mail because hubby and I were sick and I just didn't feel like dealing with anything I didn't have to. That diaper was disgustingly full in the morning, but she slept SO well and only woke twice (compared to about 6 times in a normal night.. you would think at 20 months sleeping through the night would be a given.. but we've not had a single night of full sleep.. ever). And wel always use microfleece inside diapers or use a pocket diaper.
So, we're down to it.. a disposable night diaper... if it works, I'm all over it. I need sleep, and my baby needs to be comfortable. So why do I feel so darn guilty about this? Why do I have this nagging feeling like I failed? Failed at what? That's just silly.. you don't succeed or fail at diapering your child. It doesn't make me a bad mama to put a disposable on her at night.. probably makes me a very good one for doing what is best for our family to get rest and be comfortable. So why do I feel like a horrible mommy?

Anyway.. I'm open to suggestions if you have any. The conclusion I've come to is bulk is directly proportional to absorbency, and it's just not fair to make her wear more layers that I am ready am.. so how do I get more absorbency without more bulk?

I hope someone else has been there and can at least give me some empathy and tell me it's okay to use a disposable at night. Help me rid myself of the guilt!!

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I think it sounds as if you have tried very hard. I will not say YIPPEE, let's get those sposies out. But, I know that sleep is very important for all members of the family. If I felt that I had tried and could not find something that worked, then I do not think using a sposie at night makes you a failure or a bad mommy.

God Bless,
I second what Sandi said. When it comes down to it, you need to do what's best for your family. If that means using a sposie at night, so be it. No need to feel ashamed.

You are a GREAT mama for trying to come up with the best solution!
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It's ok to use disposables at night.

You have not failed and you are an awesome mommy!

If I were you, I would try to wean her from night feedings, disposabes or not. She may need to eat more during the day to compensate for what she'll not be getting a night, and I suspect you don't want to wean her from the night feedings and will ignore my opinion, but that's just my 2 cents. I'm going to soon be trying to wean Caden from some of the night feedings. It's getting to be ridiculous. He's waking me up about 6 times a night to nurse back to sleep.
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If it makes you feel any better, even some of us die-hard cd'ing mamas use sposies at night, like me. My kiddos always wake up with red tushies after a night in cloth, whether we use cotton, hemp, or fleece liners. So we use sposies because healthy skin is more important than my cd'ing campaign. You're a great mama and you and your baby need sleep!
Sposies have their place, and like the other mamas suggested, you've found their place!!!! Like Holly, I'm going to start nightweaning Fiona, too . . .I've tried and failed before, but I NEED MY SLEEP as I'm sure you do. Break out the sposies!
I agree with Holly about weaning at night, although I'm not sure how bottle night weaning would differ from nursing night weaning. I night weaned Noah at 18 months because I could no longer take being woken up every two hours, or less often. I figured the kid could consider himself lucky for having 18 months of "on demand" nursing.

It took about 3 days until he was with the program (i.e. didn't cry about it), and I really did it pretty much cold turkey. I decided that the milk bar didn't open until 3am (he would have normally nursed at 10pm, 12am, 2am, at least), and then I pushed back the time until 5am over the course of a week or so. I was surprised at how easy it was, given the strong willed nature of my little guy, but I think that like with most other parenting decisions, if you are determined to do it, the babe will follow along.

I'd try night weaning in your situation not only to help solve the bulky diaper problem, but also to solve the nightwaking problem. I also agree that using sposies at night is not a terrible solution, if nothing else works. I personally would and have balanced comfort with long term health, as I am quite concerned about the exposure to dioxins and other chemicals in disposable diapers, and it would bother me if 50% of my child's time was spent in sposies.

The other thing you could try (besides changing at night-- and if you're waking to bottle feed her anyway, why not change her diaper before the bottle?) is a wool liner-- you can get them at My experience is that they really do reduce the need for excessive layers and really work well with hemp to force it to absorb to its max.

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I'm sorry, but I have a hard time understanding what the issue is?! If she is waking up several times a night for a feeding, then change her diaper then. As pp said, maybe night time bottles need to be reduced=more during the day(up to 30 oz of fluid during the night seems like a lot). DS still nurses several times a night(but more for a thirst quencher from the "amount" he drinks) and if he wakes up enough to pee his diaper he fusses and I change him so he sleeps better. Usually he is holding until morning so his bedtime dipe needs to hold enough (never more than 5-7 layers hemp fleece and a woolie) so his HUGE first morning pee doesn't pour right out. If he pees in middle of the night then, I change and our first morning pee isn't so huge. BTW it's not unrealistic to still get up with a toddler imo at 20 months, my ds#1 started to sleep through the night at 18 months and dd about 22 months, but neither got bottles after a year and I just left a sippy cup of water by their bed (both were in toddler beds (or in our bed) by 20 months) for when they got thirsty in middle of the night.

If you dont'wish to wean night time bottles, then is seems to me your only 2 options is to either change diapes in middle of the night or use sposies, your choice. Either way, I can't see how you would get anymore sleep if you are still getting up to get bottles.

from one tired mom to another, I DO understand the exaustion, and only you can decide what to do and what works with your concious. I do it the way I do it, because I decided this is what works for my comfort and am at peace with it so it doesn't bother me.
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My dd would nurse all night long and if I didn't change her, she would squirm and scream until I did...I probably changed her 2-3 times during the night or else she would wake up super drenched...I still am completely doubfounded at people who don't change their babies at night...aren't the diapers so soaked?
I had another thought . . .a few people posted about using microsomething (maybe microfiber?) liners from the $1 store or Walmart. They said they were VERY trim and held a ton . . .maybe you could try those in a pocket diaper?
Night weaning is a booger. We've been working on it since about 16 months. Our doctor told us to start before 12 months, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it. At this point, she get a bottle with just a little formula in it.. mostly water before bed and only water during the night, so it's not a hunger thing.. it's a comfort thing. Her sleep associations are fully ingrained in her.. me, her bottle, her binky, and her pillow. If any of those isn't there, she just gets very .. how do I say it.. frantic? The night wakings aren't always for a bottle.. sometimes (more and more often) they are just to cry. I sleep with her in her room and when she wakes at night she does NOT want me to touch her. If I try comfort her, it makes it worse and it can take as long as half an hour to get her back down. That's part of the reason night changes just don't work. She's a screamer and if I can keep that to a minimum by soft talking, maybe a bottle or a binky, she'll go back down to sleep within a few minutes. But if she gets too upset, or I have to turn on the light etc.. she becomes fully awake, and that's when our "day" starts.. no matter if it's 1 am or 4 am or 7am.. once she is awake.. she is awake until nap time. Even if I had nothing else to do during the day but care for her (which isn't the case *LOL*)... I can't handle that much sleep deprivation and with my workload, napping with her isn't an option. I've talked to a couple of different doctors about her night waking.. they say it's most likely "night terrors" and to reduce the amount of graphic tv she watches
: which is none, so I don't see how that applies. They say it's pretty common and if giving her a bottle of water helps sooth her.. do it. I did, however, go to change her last night about about 2:30 am because she seemed calm enough and actually was sleeping very well, but strangely, she wasn't even damp... but by 7am, EVERYTHING was wet. What I don't understand is how she can hold THAT much (enough to drench a diaper to the point of every fiber being saturated even up trough the wings.. there wasn't ANY where else for wetness to go) in a tiny little bladder.. it doesn't physically make sense to me.

We really do want to night wean, but given the choice between a frantic screaming baby and a calm baby drinking a bottle of water.. I choose the second. I think it's more a mommy sided problem/addiction than a baby one *L*.. I just feel so helpless with a crying child in the middle of the night who doens't want me to hold her to comfort her.

So, here is the relationship I'm seeing.. I'm not positive and could be wrong ( I need to leave her coverless at night to be sure) .. but I *think* she's waking frantic and screaming when she pees... hence last night not being frantic and upset for the first half of the night. Is it possible that it is painful for her to urinate? Possibly a UTI?? She also seems distressed during the day when she pees (yesterday, she was on my lap and seemed to "painic" when she peed and tried very hard to get her diaper off.. even though she doesn't have a rash. I thought maybe she just didn't like the wetness, but she's never been one to care if her diaper is wet or not... ) and has been super clingy and fussy the last couple of weeks. I just assumed it was because I've been ill and maybe she had a touch of what I had. She has also vomited twice last week (only in the morning) and once this week (this morning).. it's curdled milk vomit even though her last bottle with milk/formula is at like 8pm. Last week I just kind of blew it off as an upset tum and didn't worry too much because she didn't have a fever or act odd.. just a little irritable.. but not a lot. She also has a very musty/musky strong smell to her urine during the day. Not a skunky smell like we get when the diapers aren't clean, but more of a hospital urine-like smell. Does that make sense?Anyway.. I'm just babbling now, but I'm wondering if perhaps she does have an infection that would account for her "holding" her pee until she floods.. because it's painful.. and for the nightwaking just to cry .. irritability.. vomiting.. Those are all suppose to be symptoms, but gosh.. those could be symptoms of anything or nothing for that matter. And a UTI wouldn't "improve" with the use of a disposable.. so that doesnt' explain why she slept better in one.. maybe just a coincidence?

We didn't get disposables.. I thought I'd give night changes one more try before I go down that road. I know I seem rather dramatic about this *LOL*.. but no solution seems to be a good one and something just doesn't seem right latley. I know babies change, but something just seems out of sync.

I apprecaite all of your suggestions and points of view. I have to agree about the being in a disposable half the day. I said something to my dh about not wanting to do it disposables and he said "it's only one per day.. no big deal.. don't be so hard on yoruself".. but that one per day is 9-11 hours of the day.. not a normal 1-1.5 hours between normal diaper changes.

All I know at this point is I'll call her doctor tomorrow morning.. and that right now.. I need chocolate.

Thanks ladies!

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Amber, please let us know what the Dr. says! I personally would STRONGLY suspect a UTI from what you have said. That hospital urine smell is common in hospitals for a reason. There are many elderly patients who put out more urea or ammonia or something in their urine because things aren't fuctioning properly. You get the same thing with a UTI. And all the other things you mentioned also make me wonder. I hope everything turns out just fine, though! UTI's can easily turn into Kidney infections and cause serious damage!
sigh ITA see a 'COMPITANT' dr. that is going to listen to you. I think it sounds like there is some infection of sorts going on there too. hope she feels better soon and things become calm.
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I am sorry you are having trouble with night diapering.

I like to suggest my combo to people because it workds wonderfully on my heavy wetter. But I see you have tried something quite similar, so I must agree with the other poster who suggested DD. And please don't feel guity - though I don't like them, I am happy DDs exist as an option for when CD is a challenge (like with extremely heavy wetters or when washing is impossible).After all, we are talking about 1 DD for every 10 - 11 CD and the most important is that your baby is comfortable.

I would very much like to recommend ecologically safe DD, but they just never worked on my heavy wetters in the days when I used to DD. So I am going to recommend Pampers - yes, they have those little gels, but no other DD holds as well.
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I'm sorry things are so hard you right now. I agree with getting her urine checked - sounds like an infection to me too.

Sometime you just have to survive - if it takes a few disposable diapers to get you thru', so be it.

Hang in there!
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