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No comfort nursing

751 Views 6 Replies 6 Participants Last post by  Graceoc
My ds won't comfort nurse

I hear so many stories about how nursing is the greatest cure for little bumps and bruises, but when ds hurts himself he refuses to nurse... he just cries.

He has never really comfort nursed, even when he was a newborn. He'd want to suck, but then get mad when milk would come out if he wasn't hungry. More recently I've had supply issues, and he went on a nursing strike because he got frustrated with not getting enough milk. It may be that he now sees nursing as a potentially frustrating thing rather than a comforting thing.

I'll keep offering it to him when he gets hurt or upset, and hope that he'll start to see the connection between nursing and "mommy making it all better". I'm sad that we're not getting to experience this aspect of our nursing relationship. Comfort nursing would be a great thing to have as he gets older and learns to walk... and the bumps and bruises get more common...

It could be worse I guess, and he could be wanting to comfort nurse 24 hours a day.

Anyone else with a dc that won't comfort nurse?
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Does he nurse to sleep? I think some kids do just really nurse to eat, but my kids were not like that.

Perhaps if you want to teach him about nursing for comfort, you can try to just pop him on when he is sleeping and see what happens. Like maybe in the morning, just before, or as he is waking up?

I just thought about one of my daughters who when she was really upset and crying, didn't want me to touch her at all. My instinct was to try and rub her back or something, but that didn't help her. I think for her, she just need to let it out through tears.
My dd also has never been one to comfort nurse. she aslo would get very mad when she wanted to suck and milk would come out. we finally went to a pacifer and it makes me sad
i try to remember that ap is about listening to your childs cues not following rigid rules. my child wants my boobs for food only. what's a mom to do?

ps she is 9 months and almost 23 pounds (AND she will eat no solids)

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My dd, who is 8 1/2 mo, never was a big comfort nurser. I used to call her the 6 minute baby cause she'd never nurse for long. She never needed a pacifier either. She really wasn't interested in a lot of AP stuff, come to think of it. I wrote my thesis on attachment behaviour, damn it and I had a baby who didn't seem interested in it!!

But in the last month or so, since she's started teething and crawling, she's started to comfort nurse. It's like she's suddenly realized she can crawl away from me, she keeps looking back, then loses her nerve, starts crying, comes back to me or I have to fetch her and then she like wants to 'reconnect' by nursing just for a minute or so. It's so sweet, she never used to do this. And when she hurts herself, after I pick her up, she makes it clear she wants to nurse also.

So I guess their needs change as they get older.
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3girls1boy - DS doesn't really nurse to sleep. He'll nurse until he's done, then turn over and go to sleep. Its interesting about your daughter, I guess some children have different ways of coping. Thanks for mentioning that, I'll remember it.

Amy - we use a pacifier too
. We try to just use it for sleep now. Good point about AP being about listening to your child's needs, and they let you know what to do.

Wombat - How interesting that your dd is starting to want to comfort nurse now that she's becoming more independent! I guess she sees now that its a good way for her to feel connected to you. It shows me that they do see the comfort that nursing provides, they just don't always feel they need the extra comforting. What strong little beings they are
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My daughter did not start comfort nursing until around 8-9 months of age. I was upset that she didn't want to before that. Now at 11.5 months if she falls or gets hurt or is just tired or upset she is on the booby. She nurses probably every 15 minutes when we are at home, just a quick nip! I don't use a pacifier at all, maybe if you took the pacifier away he'd be more inclined to go to the real thing.
My ds never comfort nursed - in fact he stopped nursing to sleep early on as well. He did however suck his thumb, he found it at about 4 months and there was no going back...he still sucks his thumb now at 3.5. He was also a 5-10 (tops!) minute nurser - and it was only ever about food.....

DD OTOH is a MAJOR comfort nurser - to the extream, she would just sit on the couch attached to me ALL DAY if she had her way (she is 18 months) SO I guess I got both kinds! LOL!
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