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I went to a BDay party yesterday and low and behold someone just had to comment on my wearing/carrying Aly <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/irked.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="irked">: My aunt starts harping on me about how I'm going to regret allowing Aly to become "attached at the hip." Now I know she's wrong but what irked me is that she said it like she just couldn't wait until she could rub it in my face and say "I told you so." Why are people like that sometimes?? I'm guessing its because I'm doing things differently than she did and to admit I might be doing the right thing would be like admitting she did the wrong thing??? I hate having to deal with other people's baggage <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/eyesroll.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="roll"> Apparently she failed to notice all the time that Aly spent on the ground happily playing with her toys. Goodness could it be that our strong bond gives Aly the confidence to develop and become independent without me forcing it on her prematurely <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hammer.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hammer"><br><br>
Sorry to be such a ranter today but this really drives me nuts!!!
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/hug2.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Hug2"> sometimes we have to ignore what others say and do what we know is right for our children. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/thumb.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="thumbs up">
 

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People are so concerned about "spoiling" their babies or making them too dependant by carrying them to much, nursing them long or co-sleeping - I find it so sad <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/shake.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="shake"> Babies of AP parents grow to be very independent and confident children... Besides - they grow so fast!!! I want to carry my babies close to me as much as I can while they are small <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br><br>
I am sorry your aunt gave you a hard time about it. Keep up the good work - you are being a GREAT mama for your baby <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/thumb.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="thumbs up">
 

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I never have the guts to say the things I think of, but my in-my-head response would be "Since I'm younger than you and have young kids, contradicting you now won't matter because you won't believe me. But I'll be the one saying 'I told you so' in a few years when my kids are happy and quite independent."
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"><br><br>
And to your aunt <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/hopmad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hopping mad">:
 

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People can be really short-sighted. Sure, it seems to take energy when your child is young and "attached at the hip" to you, but there are so many short- and long-term benefits. Our culture encourages people to look for inconvenience and disregard benefits, though.<br><br>
People like that make me want to say, "You're right, I'm *so crazy* for wanting to promote a secure attachment between my child and myself. What am I thinking? Ignoring my child's needs makes so much more sense. Thank you ever so much for bringing me to my senses." <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/rolleyes.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="rolleyes">
 

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I just give them a polite (forced, but polite) smile and say "This is what works for my family."<br><br>
If you put an emphasis on the "my", then it also has the added benefit of reminding the person that, even if they are extended family, they are not part of the family unit under discussion.<br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>LadyBug & BabyBug</strong></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I just give them a polite (forced, but polite) smile and say "This is what works for my family."</div>
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I think this is the best way to go in situations like this.<br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"> mama. Some people just like to make drama.
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/hug2.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Hug2"> I am so Sorry.<br><br>
Just smile and nod. and remember you are doing the ery best for your baby. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/heartbeat.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="heartbeat">
 

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Idiocy does have the loudest voice. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/irked.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="irked">:<br><br>
I've found that I can only smile politely and let them think what they want. Tho it does get hard to suck it up time after time.<br><br>
Just remember you're doing the best thing for <b>your</b> family, and that's the most responsible thing anyone can do. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/thumb.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="thumbs up">
 

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Funny- our babes our about a week apart and he is always on me in public situations. No one says anything negative, only positives, but maybe it is because I'm chasing the other two around and it would be downright dangerous to have him wandering about with the playdate kids flying around.<br><br>
I wish I had a good comeback for you that would capture the safety of keeping him up <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/redface.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Embarrassment">
 
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