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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I'm not a fan of cry it out, or modified cry it out, or any "sleep training" that leaves my baby alone in the crib while she cries.

I need a solution to help get my 8 month old to sleep (preferably in her crib). She FIGHTS sleep with a vengeance, and has never been a napper. All the methods we've used in the past to get her to sleep lose their efficacy, and I'm running out of ideas and patience. I used to breastfeed her to sleep at night, now that isn't working. Holding her rocking her is not working. Swing is not working. Essential oils in diffuser are not working. Music and lullabies not working. Routine before bed (read a book, etc) is not working. Glowing/ light projecting stuffed animals not working. Sushing not working. I've tried all of these things for weeks or months at a time, and most of them helped for a time, but are no longer working. She doesn't take a pacifier. Last night I got so desperate after 3 hours of trying that I climbed into her crib with her. Her crib is in our berdroom, only a few feet from our bed.

Co-sleeping has also not been working for us, for several reasons, the biggest being that as soon as she wakes up, it takes her about 5 seconds to shoot like a rocket to the edge of the bed (which sits on a hardwood floor). We've built mesh guards on 2 sides (3rd and 4th barriers are a dresser at the foot and headboard and the top) but she keeps trying to climb onto the dresser at the foot of the bed. It isn't safe, primarily when I have to leave the room (even with a monitor).

Please help, I've not found any good sleep solutions in my research that don't involve leaving her to cry alone for some period of time.
 

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Perhaps this won't be popular here, but I have done some "crying it in" with my DD2, and it did seem to help break her dependency on me for putting her to sleep. By crying it in I mean I was right there soothing her but just did nothing to assist her in falling asleep and insisted she stay in her bed (a sidecarred crib - I just sat alongside it like a human crib rail).
This was when my DD was in a biting phase and I had to stop nursing before she was asleep. She also never liked any other methods of being put to sleep, so we didn't have rocking/patting etc to fall back on.

I sympathize, though. My older DD was a terrible sleeper and just had no clue how to fall asleep in infancy. Her ability to fall asleep at night matured a lot in her mid-ones.

I find that you have to utilize the moments where "nothing works" to get your child to sleep to push yourself towards a more independent sleep situation. If she's going to be crying while you rock her for an hour, she may as well cry in her bed next to you while you rub her back and hopefully learn to fall asleep there.

To clarify, in case it's not clear: I am saying to shift the responsibility for falling asleep to your daughter a bit. I am NOT advocating leaving her unsupported while she tries to sort it out, and there's no need for extended periods of torture. Just try doing less in the way of "putting to sleep."
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
If she's going to be crying while you rock her for an hour, she may as well cry in her bed next to you while you rub her back and hopefully learn to fall asleep there.
This thought has passed through my mind! She often does cry even while we are holding/rocking her to sleep. Heck, she starts to cry as soon as I shut the door/close the window shades, or sometimes even when I bring her into the bedroom, just because she thinks she might have to go to sleep!
 

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Night time it's usually a feed that helps. Sometimes if I take her out in the buggy she falls asleep quicker too
I- his father- play with him for an hour or more until my one year old gets hungry and then it total darkness and quiet as my wife breastfeeds him sometimes many times- he can "fall asleep" but wake as soon as moved whether an inch or over to baby bed from the futon. Occasionally we have to play many hours.
 
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