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ok we co sleep with our 10 month old and 3.5 year old..my hubbie has moved to another room all together to get moer sleep...My ddwho is 3.5 has started to cry and scream in her sleep and not to mention kick..she will cry out loud for a while ...we take her to the potty but if DH tries she screams for me I am in the meantime trying to keep DS 10 months from wakeing up...but to no avail......he wakes up she is screaming and this happens 2-3 times a night I am loosing it...both mental health and sleep...I need some help.....
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Hugs, mama -- I don't have any great suggestions but I just wanted you to feel heard! It sounds really difficult. I suppose DD won't sleep with DH? That seems like it would make things lots easier, but maybe she's opposed. You've probably discussed all this with her (about how mama needs her sleep w/ new baby, etc.)? I hope you find a change soon that helps you!!
 

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My three year old does that occasionally too. I really don't know why.

If I were you I would work on getting her to sleep with daddy. My two oldest girls were both "weaned" from depending on me at night time when the newest baby came along, and they are doing fine now.
 

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Most nights, once I go to bed, I move ds (almost 3) to a little crib mattress next to our bed. Our bed is on the floor, so it is really right there. He stays down there until about 5, when he crawls back up to me. Doing that gives me about 6-7 hours with him in arms reach, but about 6 inches lower than me so he isn't on top of me all night. Also, could you try taking dd to the potty right before you go to bed? Maybe that will help alleviate her night waking.

Hugs, mama. I hope you find something that works.
 

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Wow I could've written your post, but I gave up long before you!
I have a now 9 month old ds and a now 4 year old dd. But when ds was born we all slept together and it was hard. and ridiculous. I was up ALL NIGHT. My dd has always cried and yelled when she wakes up at night. Always. And she had to have me take her to the bathroom as well. And she would often be up for hours at a time in the middle of the night rolling around, singing, talking etc. It was crazy. I don't know why I thought it would work with the baby, but I really wanted it to. We did this for six weeks. I was up with one or the other all night. And when the baby would wake up, I was so freaked out about him waking up my dd that I would rush him out of the room so his crying wouldn't stir her. Which would inevitably wake him. I felt so bad about him not getting the sleep and calm he deserved, and about me hushing my dd anytime she made a peep or cried, and I was sick with sleep deprivation that I decided to move me and ds into the next room and have dd sleep with DH in the original room. The night I moved us, my never sleeping ds slept 8 hours straight, and my dd slept through 13 hours without waking. I was shocked. And no it wasn't always like this, it was hard some nights, my dd would wake up and want me, so I would go lie down with her until she fell asleep, sometimes I would have to run back in my room and put ds back to sleep because he would wake up if I was gone for two minutes and so I would do the musical beds all night. But they weren't waking each other up, and they were sleeping much better, and I wasn't stressing about it. Most nights it was fine and if she needed me I was right there, or she would come in quietly and get me.

One thing you could do if you wanted to give this a try, and you have the room, is put a single mattress on the floor beside your bed in the other room, and if your dd wants to sleep with you she can come in and sleep on that bed with you. I would have done this if I had the room. At first I think the transition is difficult, I felt bad for moving us, and dd was confused by it, but she got used to it and I just told her that it was because the baby was waking her up and I didn't want her to be disturbed all night, I didn't want to put it on her at all. And like I said, I was only a second away and I was there. It also strengthend the bond between her and her dad. She still wants me to do those bathrooms trips, but ds isn't waking up because I hear her and jump to it. They both sleep wonderfully. I can't wait until we all sleep together again, but this is just the way it needs to be right now. I honestly wish more people had told me that co-sleeping with more than one can be difficult, because when it didn't work i felt like a failure. And I know most people can do it just fine, but my children are wakers and screamers
And it didn't work. I'm not saying it can't but you have to know when a situation is being more of a hinderance to sleep and peace, instead of a help. I don't know if this is possible for you, but I just wanted you to know that you aren't alone, that my children don't sleep well together either, and that doesn't mean you have done anything wrong. I really don't know how people do it with more than one child, and of course I am so jealous that they can. :LOL
 
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