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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I'm facing alot of challenges right now with homeschooling my two kids. If I can't get these things worked out, I will have to make a decision about sending one or both of them to school (I've already looked into a charter school that has a heavy emphasis on music/fine arts). I hope somebody can help, I really feel like I'm between a rock and a hard place.<br><br>
1. My five year old is bored to tears!!! He's exceedingly bright and full of energy. He's been asking to play with friends but there is only one boy near us, we are isolated in a very small rural area.<br><br>
2. Gas prices are $3.50 a gallon and everything is a half hour drive or more for us.<br><br>
3. My husband works 65 hours a week, so I don't get much of a break and I'm almost always burned out and overwhelmed.<br><br>
4. My husband isn't on board to unschool and we did try that (well, deschooling) he wants me to be structured, he wants my oldest who is 10, to be doing a certain amount of work everyday. We've had some serious fights about how we are homeschooling and it has put a strain on our marriage (me being burned out and too tired at the end of the day to have much to do with connecting to him).<br><br>
5. My son has a severe peanut/nut/milk allergy, one reason I homeschool him (kindy now)<br><br>
6. My 10 year old is dyslexic and is very much behind 'grade level' We've been told she needs vision therapy, but we don't have the $5000 for her to get it, unless I go back to work, and I can't work unless they are in school.<br><br>
7. My son doesn't seem to do well without structure. He's bored and gets into stuff and trouble. We're involved in a HS group, 4H and we generally stay busy with other social stuff.<br><br>
Finally.....because of my kids age span (4+ years) it seems like most of the stuff we do is geared toward my oldest as my son isn't quite old enough to do alot of things and even when he is, he doesn't seem interested in much and complains how bored he is.<br><br>
The bottom line is my kids needs aren't being met. My ds has become a huge problem and is causing alot of friction in the whole family dynamic.<br><br>
I don't know why HS'ing seems to come so easy to others, maybe that is a misperception though. I think the one huge factor is how much my DH is at work.<br><br>
I'm really down about this. I just don't think it should be this hard.<br><br>
Thanks for reading if you go this far!
 

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I just wanted to offer *hugs* to you. Though I'm not dealing with all your specific problems I am frustrated with my ability to find friends for my sons that aren't in school or preschool. I feel so strongly that we are doing a good thing here but there's just not enough people around that are doing it. Well I know they are there somewhere, I just haven't found them.
 

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<b><span><span style="font-size:small;"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/hug2.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Hug2"> I'm sorry you are having a hard time. My dh is not 100% with me HS'g my 5 1/2 yr old either. He is a very bright kid and gets bored very easily. I don't know what your 5 yr old knows but there are so many things you can have him do. Have him cut out magazine pictures that relate to the letters of the alphabet and make an ABC book.<br><br>
What I have found is that my son likes the computer. I found some interactive online learning activities for him to do. I found a site that taught my son short/long vowel, digraphs, controlled vowels and diphthongs sounds. It helped him alot with sounding out words and reading. He can read scholastics/bob books on his own (from the library). Go to your library (or search the web) for info that will help you with projects. Pick up art books and have him paint what he sees in the book. My son is into Thomas the tank engine and he will put train infront of him on the table and draw it. The .99 store has little work books that he enjoys doing also.<br><br>
Just make learning fun for him. My son's favorite thing is making things with play-dough. When things get overwhelming inside take them out for a walk. My son likes to point out weird bugs. You don't have to be stuck in the house because of gas prices. And don't limit learning to just text. Hope that helps, Good luck!<br><br>
Liz</span></span></b>
 

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It sounds like you have a lot of stress that isn't just about homeschooling- some issues with your dh that need to be worked through- even if he can't work less hours or anything- talking can help.<br><br>
I think you have lots of good reasons for wanting to homeschool your kids and its great you are trying your best to fill their needs. I think you did a very good job of laying out your issues here. Your 5 year old needs more structure you say- so can you make a daily chart of what he should do? He could help pick what will be on it- include meals, time for outdoor play, reading together, cleaning up- whatever makes sense to the 2 of you. I understand the desire to unschool- but if your child needs you to provide structure there is nothing wrong with that. You could even let your dh weigh in on the schedule and add a little math time each day (if that would make him feel better)- this wouldn't mean you had to do a work book during that time, you could plan to cook and measure, or play with blocks to explore shapes. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/wink1.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="wink1"> Are there any YMCA type activites you could enroll him in just for kids his age?<br><br>
For the 10 year old- I would research vision therapy online and see what you can be doing at home for starters. You could also post in the special needs parenting board here to ask about it. I would consider if totally unschooling is worth it in the household right now, or if you and your dc could do some unit studies or something that dc would enjoy and would make your dh feel better? Surely there is a topic the 2 of you could investigate together?<br><br>
At least here- school is letting out for summer, so you couldn't send the kids to school this week anyway. Take the summer and see if you can make things work at home, if you feel in the fall school is the right decision, its not like you can't change your mind again. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/duck.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Duck">:
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Sneezykids</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/8209732"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
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1. My five year old is bored to tears!!! He's exceedingly bright and full of energy. He's been asking to play with friends but there is only one boy near us, we are isolated in a very small rural area.</div>
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We just moved to the country this month, so this is something I've been thinking about IRT my kids. We do have a couple of neighbors, but none of them have kids the ages of ours. Do you schedule regular playdates with the friend who lives nearby? In the past, I've had a standing weekly get-together with a friend and her child, I'm going to try to do that in my new community.<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">2. Gas prices are $3.50 a gallon and everything is a half hour drive or more for us.</td>
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Yep, I hear you. In our case, we're 7 miles from a town of 4,000. But to go to a decent store or meet up with a bigger homeschooling community, it's about a half hour drive (or more). So I'm trying to find a balance.<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">3. My husband works 65 hours a week, so I don't get much of a break and I'm almost always burned out and overwhelmed.</td>
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That does sound overwhelming! How would your kids feel about giving you an hour or two each day to yourself? Would it be possible to schedule each day from 1pm to 3pm (or whatever time works for you) for quiet time- each person in the household gets to do whatever quiet activity they want. You'd get time for yourself, and the kids would have uninturrupted time to read, play legos, research their latest topic of interest, play video games, watch movies, etc....<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">4. My husband isn't on board to unschool and we did try that (well, deschooling) he wants me to be structured, he wants my oldest who is 10, to be doing a certain amount of work everyday. We've had some serious fights about how we are homeschooling and it has put a strain on our marriage (me being burned out and too tired at the end of the day to have much to do with connecting to him).</td>
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This sounds really hard. Would your DH be willing to work with your oldest? Perhaps in the evenings or on the weekends? For awhile, my DH was doing science experiments with our kids every Saturday (we knew another family that did this, so we tried it out, and my DH really enjoyed it)<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">5. My son has a severe peanut/nut/milk allergy, one reason I homeschool him (kindy now)<br><br>
6. My 10 year old is dyslexic and is very much behind 'grade level' We've been told she needs vision therapy, but we don't have the $5000 for her to get it, unless I go back to work, and I can't work unless they are in school.</td>
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I don't know much about vision therapy, but is there anything you can do at home? I would imagine you could find some ideas somewhere on the web. (what can't you find directions for on the internet?? <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> )<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">7. My son doesn't seem to do well without structure. He's bored and gets into stuff and trouble. We're involved in a HS group, 4H and we generally stay busy with other social stuff.</td>
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One of the best pieces of advice I ever got from this board was that making a daily schedule/routine doesn't have to be 'schooly.' You can create more structure in your day by having a reading hour, a cooking hour, a craft hour, a playdoh hour, etc. Or you can do something different each day: Monday can be beach day, Tuesday is park day, Wednesday is library day, Thursday is co-cop day, Friday is field trip day. Or if you're staying at home: Monday is baking day, Tuesday is game day, Wednesday is painting day, Thursday is puzzle day, Friday is outdoor day, and so on...<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">I'm really down about this. I just don't think it should be this hard.</td>
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I think HSing is like anything else in life. Sometimes it's hard, sometimes it's easy. To me, it doesn't necessarily sound like HSing is the problem, it's a family dynamics problem that is made obvious because you're all home together each day. I think that working with your youngest to create some sort of schedule/routine would go a long way towards helping your family.
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
<<<Sometimes it's hard, sometimes it's easy. To me, it doesn't necessarily sound like HSing is the problem, it's a family dynamics problem that is made obvious because you're all home together each day.>>><br><br>
You're right, it's not HS that is the problem, it's being together all day, everyday. And, ds. He can be a big time challenge, he reeaally wears me out!<br><br>
I did have a playdate swap with my neighbor but it only lasted a few weeks. I'll have to get it going again. Right now it's okay, but I don't like her middle child at all, he's a mean little kid who has kicked and punched my ds while playing on their trampoline. In the summer he'll be home all the time and I don't want my ds exposed to him at all. (OT..I don't know why the mom doesn't get him help, he has obvious problems!) so it's not ideal really unless her ds comes here and then I must supervise them (we live on a lake) so not much of a break, but still it's playtime for my ds and I have to do *something*.<br><br>
My dd has friends that she made in school. They play well and often. My ds doesn't know anybody because he didn't go to school. The HS'ers we've met in our area don't have same aged boys <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"><br><br>
I'm going to see if I can work up something with a schedule.
 
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