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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Things seemed to be getting better up through 3 months, but then we've had a backslide. Starting about 2 weeks ago suddenly nothing keeps these boys occupied. Now at 4 months, I can't leave the room or break eye contact without suffering a screaming match. I have a wonderful baby gym, a ceiling mobile, a swing and a bouncer. Nothing works. The cry they give out is clearly an "I'm bored" cry, which has recently been matched with my "I'm going insane" cry.

I think, at least for Sebastian (who turned over at 2.5 months and is threatening to get his legs straight under him in "downward facing dog" pre-crawl motions already), it's frustration with a lack of mobility. He loves being on his belly and can get his head and chest off the ground but then he's stuck. His brother, Tillman, doesn't show the prediliction towards motion but is bored nonetheless. Also, Sebastian out of the blue started refusing a bottle (he's breastfed, but has been getting the occasional bottle of EBM).

Sarah, I think, mentioned that 3-4 months was a hard time. What did you do to survive? When does it get better? Any tips on how to make it through?

Paula
 

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Oh yes, I remember having this difficult time with my twins!

Here are some things to try for some peace:

-load them up in the car and drive until they zonk out for a bit. Park and read, knit, whatever you'd like to do in the car for a bit.

-hold one while one is in the bouncy seat at your feet. Use your foot to really bounce the other one (you can make eye contact this way and making more of a bouncing movement might satisfy their need for more movement) I found that if I just put my twins in a bouncy by themselves they cried, if I really bounced it with my foot, though, they liked it.

-This is when I really used a mother's helper. Any young teens around that would come for a few bucks an hour to hold one while you tend to the other and then switch?

Hang in there. This too shall pass. HUGS!
 

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Yes get out. I know it is a pain but go to the Farmer'smarket, or the park or something. It helps. Mine get cabin fever after a couple of days.
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
Thanks for the tips. I do a variation of the bouncy chair with one foot while nursing/holding the other already. Honestly, it's one of the only things that works. As a multiple mom, no appendage goes unused, right?

Sadly the car is a no-go as we don't own one. The kids do conk out on the subway but there's only so long I can ride before I go insane.

As to getting out, we do. Farmer's market twice a week, daily grocery trips, play group, playground with my older son. I have a great double stroller that we take everywhere and on overage go out at least twice a day. The problem is that I have the bassinet/pram style as it's better for their backs. Pair the fact that--for once--we're having a hot summer here with Sebastian's prediliction for sleeping on his face and you end up with one sweaty, angry and thoroughly disgruntled baby. Also Tillman is easily distracted when he nurses and basically needs a quiet, comfortable and familiar place.

Ack! Okay, next question. How long does this phase last?Please?
 

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I agree! Get out! I still have to do this in the afternoon after their second nap or else I will go insane. Go for a walk. I think it lasted about 3 weeks for us and then got better, but we went through it again at six months and 9.5 months. I think we are just coming out of the one that started at 9.5 months (I sure hope so).
 

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I went through that too. Possibly teething? I personally felt a lot better after they started solids. The demand on my body to feed constantly really wore me out. They seemed happier again once they started crawling. I'm hoping Ethan will finally be happy once he is walking, but I'm starting to suspect that kid will never be content. But I know he was frustrated with his lack of mobility as a young baby. We're now experiencing double separation anxiety which is driving me CRAZY. I can't leave the room to go to the bathroom without hearing babies scream or kids walking in on me.

So one thing that really has helped DH and I that we started a few months ago was that we each get a "night out". We can't really find too many babysitter that will take all 4 of the kids, so we don't get out together as much as we should. But I started going to a knitting circle once a week while he watches the kids and it helps me SO MUCH. Its amazing what 3 hours without kids will do for your coping ability. I was really nervous about it at first but then realized he is their DAD and is perfectly capable of keeping them alive for 3 hours without my help. He goes to play disc golf on Thursdays. I'm not always happy about him being gone for so long, but its something he really enjoys and he's always in a much better mood when he gets home. So I don't mind it as much. He's much more apt to help me out with chores, etc without griping when he gets to go. Spending occaisional time apart has oddly drawn us closer. Anyway, I highly recommend taking you regular you time doing anything you like doing. Even just grocery shopping by yourself or going out with a friend.
 

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I'll second (and third and fourth!) what the pp's have said: get out of the house.

I had seriously high needs babies. In fact, the first year was so hellatious I barely remember it (nature's amnesia). My kids were not the sit back and look at stuff kind of infants. They really needed action/stimulation and things got A LOT better once they were mobile on their own.

Until then, we went out a lot for walks in the stroller/slings, in our neighborhood, malls, grocery stores, Target, whatever. When I was too exhausted to take them out, I would hire a mother's helper (a teenager) to come take them for a walk. Even having them out of the house for 45 mintues did everyone some good.
 

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Mine like to be worn in the baby carrier when they are bored, although that only accomidates one at a time. My girl is going through an especially bored phase right now. If I'm home she just cries and cries no matter what I do, but as soon as we go anywhere she is perfectly content. Luckily, my boy is so mellow he makes up for her being especially needy right now. I just know there is light at the end of the tunnel and keep on keeping on and knowing that I'm doing the best I can do for them. This too shall pass. Oh, I should add that my twins are seven months old now.
 
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